"This is totally worse than the time they didn't tell me Cadbury chocolate is so much better here because they wanted to keep it all for themselves, the assholes. Flying broomsticks."

"There are a lot of things John hates about his job."

Saving And Being Saved: "Five boys and Battle School. Nobody is satisfied, but one can imagine Graff doesn't care." Fangs Up: "Someone finally takes notice of the fact that Gabe Saporta says he spoke to a snake." One Man Band: "It takes Spencer a while to figure it out, but he doesn't let it change how he behaves when he does." Patrick Stump's Strip Joint, or The One Where They're All Strippers Apart From Patrick Who Has Taken Up Handicrafts (Not Like That): "The one where they're all (pretty terrible) strippers, Patrick owns the strip joint, and his therapist has suggested he take up a hobby."

BOB IN SPACE: "Bob really hated it when aliens tried to eat his team." untitled sga/bandom ficlet: "For seven days after he arrives in Atlantis, Ryan doesn't say a word to anyone." Otherworldly Experiences: "Four times Mikey ended up in the Pegasus galaxy." Like Souls That Balance Joy And Pain: "Eugene is, quite literally, tangled." All The Days We Never Lived: "Five ways that Tangled didn't end." Hell Yeah I'm the Motherfucking Princess: "Gerard is a pretty pretty princess, but a very sad one, because his parents except him to marry a prince and all the princes suck! So his only joy comes from visiting Mikey, who is accidentally a dragon, and drawing. Until one day, Frank enters his life! And suddenly, both Gerard's life and the diversionary ruffles on his pants have meaning." Blueprints For Building Better Boys: ""Eight years ago," Amanda begins, "Dr. Monae and myself began work on the ArchAndroid project. By the time they were ready, we'd designed and tested everything, right down to the cybernetics and the synthetic organs. Two months ago, we switched them on for the first time." Frank, Gerard, Ray, and Mikey are the ArchAndroids. Frank's got a faulty personality circuit, Gerard's primary memory chip is kind of temperamental, there's a bug somewhere in Mikey's speech protocol, and Ray's anger response lags like a motherfucker. They're also the world's most potty-mouthed robots, although with any luck there won't be any occasion for the world's press to find out about that." The Winner Takes It All: "It's Decaydance Stage-Gay Chicken. Let's play."

Mikey needs a date for a work event. Gerard steps in.

Come Now, We're Children (Let's Play A Game): He has no idea what you're supposed to say when you find one of your...werewolf acquaintances, completely out of their mind, growling like they're about to see what your insides taste like. There's no handbook for this. Stiles is thinking that if he survives he might write one. Totally Not A Meet-Cute: "Gerard has had a crush on Train Guy for a while, but just going up and talking to him would be weird. He needs a reason, right?" In the Belly Of: "Because space whales…fish…are a thing. In multiple universes. (Look, Todd asked and I said Okay, and this is what happened. I don’t know either.)" Turn Your Head: "Written for the genderplay square at kink_bingo's April 2012 "gift baskets" challenge." Apple Bottom Jeans (And Other Love Songs): "Or, how Steve Rogers--kind of--learns to dance."

Frank toyed with the idea of asking for help, but in the end, decided against it. He wasn’t embarrassed, exactly, or ashamed, but this was new and unsettling and he wasn’t ready to share it with anyone else. He couldn’t meet his own gaze in the mirror and his skin felt tight and prickly as he stripped away the layers of clothes and slid into the shower. He was blushing, he could feel the heat in his face and it pissed him off, because there was no shame in what he was going to do, and yet— He didn’t want to examine what he was feeling too closely.

Being exhausted is nothing like being drunk, but some nights Gerard gets too tired to remember that.

"I met the drummer of My Chemical Romance in a drum circle at Daytona Beach. Spring break, 1996. We had a brief affair.”

In which Gerard Way takes a stand against discrimination, Adam Lambert discovers the importance of dice, Kris Allen is not kidnapped against his will, and the folks at 19E learn to love the stage!(?)gay. Welcome to the Zombies Ate Your Idols tour, 2010!

MCR/Adam high school au crossover fic where they go LARPing.

Frank bemoans the fact that the Way brothers are motherfucking cockteases. Gerard is VERY VERY SINCERE. Mikey shrugs. Often. Pete just needs a profound deep dicking. Frank can maybe help him out with that.

"'4 and 14 adopt a newborn baby together. What do they name it, how do they raise it, etc, etc. Do they eventually get it siblings? Do they ditch it in a dumpster on prom night because its not as fun as they thought?' THIS IS QUITE LITERALLY THE WEIRDEST THING I HAVE EVER WRITTEN. And yet, I am oddly charmed by it."