Tony’s almost at the door of his lab when he hears it. It’s low, throaty; just a split second of a thing. But it’s undoubtedly the sound of Barnes moaning.

Dave and Karkat have storytime with the trollmance novel. -If Dave isn’t going to get jolly over some fantasy troll getting eaten out, he is maybe going to get a little jolly over Karkat getting jolly over some fantasy troll getting eaten out.-

Care and fucking of your lispy bipolar nerd.

Conner has a very specific fantasy in mind. He wants Tim to watch, and Tim is more than glad to do so.

All Might – Toshinori – fakes it. All the time, every time, because he has to. Aizawa thinks lying and liars are the most exhausting things in life, so of course he didn't expect to fall in love, but here they are.

Five times the #1 headliner All Might and underground scrub Eraserhead teamed up, and one time they didn't. Unfortunately, the first time they meet, both heroes are already high on weaponized ecstasy – or Dust, as it's known on the street. Let the good times roll.

“It’s just not manly to leave your bro like this, after knowing he can’t do anything about it, you know?” Kirishima blabbers some kind of bullshit excuse, and the worst part is that it looks like he’s totally convinced of it. “It’s just a— handjob,” he stumbles over the word, the weight of what he’s proposing hitting him all at once, but he doesn’t stop. “—but if you're not into it we can pretend I didn't just say that.” Bakugou has to restrain himself from saying that he’s very much into it. Like, a lot, really. a.k.a Kirishima learns the reason behind Bakugou's grumpiest days, and he offers to help because that's what best bros do.

Jonny’s prostate is a gift from the gods. Patrick’s patience, also.

Zhenya is curious. Now that he’s seen Sid at a vulnerable moment, he can’t get the image out of his mind.

In which Karkat Vantas' roommate, Dave "straight as a line of coke" Strider, discovers the joys of prostate stimulation. Again. And again. And again.

“I want you to bitch me.” Tim reacted to the word so strongly he nearly fell off his chair. “Kon you- you can't say that!” It wasn't a word one should bring up in polite company, Tim had learned early on. Kon rolled his eyes emphatically. “Fine. I want you to help me transition my dynamic into one that more closely resembles how I feel inside. Happy?”

Tim gets off on getting off in public, and Jay happens to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. …Or, actually, maybe it's exactly the right place at the right time.

Damian has never experienced sexual attraction in the way a majority of the populace does, but he's never been one to let himself miss out on anything. He's also not someone who has any interest in having another person touch him. The solution? Simply doing it himself.