Alternate names – ‘this human emotion called ‘butt-touch,’’ ‘but who tops,’ ‘parkourstuck’ Steps 1. Be Dave Strider, human, tricker extraordinaire and minor GrubTube sensation. Meet some douchebag at a practice session. 2. Be Karkat Vantas, troll, traceur with a few tricks and an ornery fucker with something to hide. 3. Step into the trick, keep your core tight, and flip. 4. Keep flipping. 5. Now kiss. Tips -Drink plenty of water. -Don’t slow down as you’re approaching the obstacle! That’s stutter-stepping, and you will fuck up hard. -Knees up, shoulders back. -Quit worrying already and touch his hot butt.

The halls of the Gods are empty, echoing with unheard prayers. The forces of corruption and decay are growing in power. Soon they shall sweep across the world like an unholy plague. From the deep caverns beneath the majestic Dragonshard Mountains, across the mighty Greenweald Forest, to the fair city of Porthaven on the storm-wracked coast, there are fourteen people with the mark of a divine ruler on their skin. They do not know it, but they and only they can save the world from apocalypse and ruin. So naturally, they're going to spend as long as possible arsing about slaying monsters and looting ancient temples. 'Cos, you know, adventurers.

Fenris has kept busy since the events at Kirkwall. Tracking Tevinter slavers in the South leads him to the Temple of Sacred Ashes the night before the Conclave. From there, everything begins to fall apart. OR: Fenris is the Inquisitor and he has no patience for Venatori bullshit.

Shang Qinghua goes to take a self-indulgent peek at his baby protagonist son and gets a kick to the shrivelled heart for his troubles. He gave up on changing the story years ago! Yet he finds himself helping his protagonist son's adoptive mother anyway. Just this one change won't matter too much, right? One little change leads to more. Shang Qinghua never meant to care, but he becomes invested in making sure that his new family survives the looming plot. With the changes to the world cascading around him, with his position as a traitor pulling him between his sect and a certain ice demon, and with the protagonist growing up so quickly, how is one displaced author meant to ensure that everything turns out all right? A Pre-Canon to Canon Divergence story.

In the first months of the war, A'Sharad finds a whole tribe of his people viciously slaughtered, with only one survivor. What begins as an investigation to find the culprit and a mission from the Council to support Tatooine's petition to enter the Republic rapidly turns into something else entirely, though, and A'Sharad, his padawan, and their tiny clone squad find themselves caught up in mysteries that can be traced all the way back to the start of the Republic.

Shang Hua really lucked out being reborn as the much-coddled son of one of the most ferocious demon matriarchs of the north. There are only a few, minor, inconsequential downsides.

Jango Fett makes a comeback as Mand’alor during the Mandalorian Civil Wars by reviving an archaic tradition – rescuing an enemy in battle in order to wed them into one’s clan. Such was often, in the past, how the ending of feuds began. So he rescues Lady Satine Kryze and her Jedi Protector, Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi. As for marrying them into his clan – well. Clan Fett is a Clan of exactly one, at the moment. He’s thought this through. Really. Not getting more than he bargained for with two catty and lovesick teenaged revolutionaries at all. It’s fine. Things are fine. He is completely in control. (Is he, though?)