"As it turns out, fighting crime is the easy part."

"The Bastard is not in love with me, and I can prove it. With science!"

“Write what you know” was good enough advice for Jo March, so it’s good enough for Patrick Kane.

David stared up at him as he came to the table, and then Cook put a hand on David's shoulder and leaned over him. There was a really—really—weird moment when David thought for a second that Cook was about to—was going to—and David's stomach squeezed into a tiny knot, but Cook was just reaching over to grab the jacket he'd left on his seat.

Parker recruits Eliot for a side job. Comedy and horror ensue.

"The king sent me to get you," Merlin said, with a tone that implied strongly that he wasn't rolling his eyes where Arthur could see, but just wait until his back was turned. "He said you're to get changed into formal clothes and meet him in the Great Hall, there's a delegation coming from the Summer Court."

Arthur is a BNF and Merlin is his prized beta

Steve takes things like personal responsibility and respect seriously. Tony's got people he pays to take care of that kind of thing, and anyway, he's pretty sure that he's going to die of some exotic disease in his workshop, because Dummy's still a little spotty about what is 'clean' enough to put on an open wound. The rest of the Avengers are in this for personal gain, except for Clint, he just enjoys being a dick. And some things shouldn't be a chore.

After one scandal too many, Patrick Kane gets traded. Eventually it stops being the worst thing to ever happen to him.