Chris Colfer currently has only 1 mission: sex. Okay, no, that sounds sort of creepy. And a little obsessive, although that’s actually becoming increasingly appropriate. Look, he just wants to have sex before he shrivels up and dies. Or turns 21, preferably. And he knows exactly who he wants to be ‘the one’. Now he just has to sell the idea to Adam Lambert and let the good times roll. Or something like that. He hasn't really thought that far ahead. (But that might be a lie.)

Darren looks at Chris a little helplessly. “I think I could name, maybe, two people who have won American Idol. And that’s only because we’ve covered them on Glee.” “Oh.” Chris frowns slight before perking up once more. “Well, he’s super cute and religious but not like, over the top about it. He wouldn’t swear so he kept saying Gosh and Darn on the show.” “And you had a crush.” Darren finishes, smiling at Chris. “Ohhh, you get to flirt with your teenage crush!” Now he’s bouncing up and down on the couch. “This is fabulous!”

I wasn’t going to post this because it’s INSANE, but then...well. PWP! I wrote it! This never happens, guys, so...enjoy. In case you’re like WHO IN THE HELL IS BRENDON URIE? Here is a visual. He’s really hot and he makes funny faces like Darren does when he sings. Obviously they are MFEO.

Chris winds up on Chord's lap during the Glee Live! tour. A lot. Blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol.

They are making out, in a manner the script even goes so far as to call "heated," and Chris is really, really wishing he spent more of his time making out with people he didn't work with so he'd have some kind of frame of reference for this type of thing.

"Check it out, I think you've found a nerd soulmate," Mark whispers loudly, especially for a dude who was home-schooled and likes to bird watch. But Chris obligingly looks across the aisle to the opposing gate and holy crap- there's a Yoda backpack leaning up against the leg of a skinny redhead.

“He’s kind of a slut, isn’t he?” Naya murmurs in Darren’s ear, making him jump. “I love it.”

You should totally write something about Darren and Chris relieving the tension of shooting this episode (3x05).

"What, you don't roll around with all your clothes on when you're having sex?" Darren asks, and Chris snorts into his shoulder. "Because that's, like, the only way I'll do it. Either roll or go home."

For this prompt on the kink meme: Chris was fine with Kurt getting his first kiss with a boy before he did, and he was fine with Kurt getting a boyfriend before he did. But when he reads the script for the senior prom episode (a.k.a. the one where Kurt and pretty much all of ND book hotel rooms and go all the way), he decides that he's had enough of being jealous that his on-screen alter ego is getting all the action. After a long and thorough process of deciding who the lucky recipient of his V-card is going to be (seriously, he made flowcharts), he decides on Darren, who -- after being reassured that Chris hasn't fallen madly in love with him, he just wants Darren to fuck him in the ass -- Darren happily obliges. Hot first-time sex ensues.

Here is the second edition of Awesome Ladies Podfic Anthology! This collection brings together 104 woman-centered stories by 86 different authors and 47 different podficcers in 64 fandoms, for a total running time of a little over seven and a half hours!!!

In which there are parties, awkwardness and orgasms.

“You really are good at that,” Dylan says, echoing his thoughts. “Good at what, exactly?” Chris says, lifting one finger to his mouth and licking it, which makes Dylan’s eyelashes flutter. “All of it,” Dylan sighs. “All of it. All the parts.”