xiii. no stranger to love “Houston, we have a problem,” says Phichit Chulanont as he looks up from his phone.

Wei Wuxian meets his soulmate when they reach for the same bunch of daffodils at the local bodega. Too bad he immediately puts his foot in his mouth. How can he repair the damage and convince this beautiful man to date him? Let the group text conversation begin! (for the 50 Meetcutes meme - You reach for the same bouquet in a flower shop)

So.... what exactly did Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang get up to while Wei Ying was getting Lan Zhan drunk? In at least one reality, the answer is: Wow. Just. Really, quite a lot. or JC and NH have drunken virginal sex and discover that they are exactly each other's type. In that order. or NH discovers that JC has an unusual physiology and proceeds to lock that shit down.

A month and a half into his duties, a letter arrives. Lan Zhan, it reads, I miss you already. Throw over your responsibilities and meet me at the western ridge at Qixi. Yours, Wei WuXian. -- Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi parted ways after Yunping — but not forever. [!!CQL verse!!]

After the dramatic bodega courtship saga, our favorite duo finally have a date scheduled. Naturally, the rest of the squad needs to weigh in on the first-date preparations. And during the date itself, the group chat discussion is hot and heavy! (Sequel to 'Bodega Love')

"You can't seriously be suggesting that we elect Sect Leader Yao to be Chief Cultivator!" “I don’t see the problem,” Nie Mingjue said, heroically maintaining a straight face despite the slightest curve in his eyes that indicated a man who knew exactly what the problem with his suggestion was. “According to all the stories I’ve heard him tell, Sect Leader Yao has been at the forefront of every action in the past few years, large or small - no matter where or how implausibly quickly he must have traveled to get there.”

Lan Xichen wished that people in Qinghe weren't so notoriously reluctant to share personal information. It was one thing not to know exactly how old someone was, or what their given name was, but entirely another thing to belatedly find out that there was a new baby in the family.

As a result of his newfound cultivation, Wei Wuxian was having trouble sleeping - and then he realizes that he sleeps just fine during war council meetings. What could possibly be the cause? The only thing that seems to be in common is the presence of one Sect Leader Nie... And so Project "Sleep with Nie Mingjue" is born! (shut up, Jiang Cheng, the name is fine - who could possibly misunderstand?)

Once upon a time in Yiling, a rumor started about the Yiling Patriarch having started to collect a harem of beautiful young men from a variety of sects. (it was Nie Huaisang's fault) (to be fair, the porn didn't help)

“Thank you all for coming,” Lan Xichen said, pouring tea for the other three people at the table. “I think you all know why I’ve asked you to gather here today.” “Sure,” Nie Mingjue said, accepting the cup. “Because our younger siblings have decided to join together to become a criminal gang.” “That seems like an unduly harsh way to put it,” Jiang Yanli murmured, inclining her head in thanks to Lan Xichen as she took her own. “After all, they’re helping people, aren’t they?” Wen Qing huffed. “Leverage,” she drawled. “If I ever find out who gave them that idea…!”

A very specific part of Jin Ling's Yunmeng Jiang heritage makes itself known when he comes of age. His friends help him out.

Prompt: We keep hearing little bits about the Nie bros dad, but what about their moms?

prompt: The junior generation is full of girls

Prompt: NMJ and JGY spend an entire banquet on the same page and in perfect agreement on something - and that something is that the random, minor sect leader's daughter that is CLEARLY trying to get with LXC is Not Good Enough For Him and they both need to make sure the OTHER doesn't accidentally maim and/or poison her throughout the night.

"Hi, I'm Wei Wuxian. I'm a Career Omega and this is my fourth season on the show. I like spicy food, archery and alphas who are funny. Or maybe I don't, I haven't rolled over for one yet." On-screen, Wei Wuxian winks at the audience laughter. Hot or Knot is the world's most popular reality TV show. Part dating show, part survival show, Hot or Knot is everyone's guilty pleasure - and Wei Wuxian is a fan favourite. - The Love Island/Hunger Games reality dating tv show A/B/O au

The first time Jin Guangshan mentioned it, Jin Guangyao felt a great surge of relief – at last, he thought. At last someone else that isn’t me notices it!