(563): Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards.

It’s not his proudest moment, but Sakumo takes one look at the newest occupant of the gym and walks into a wall.

For a prompt on my Tumblr: Playboy!Orochimaru who ends up with Single Dad!Sakumo in the end. No understands what happened.

Mikoto does not want her elderly relatives trying to pick out her future husband. Kushina has a brilliant idea. (Oh no... she's hot.)

Wen Qing: okay so like Wen Qing: were either of you going to warn me Wen Qing: that Yu Ziyuan and Jiang Fengmian were Like That? Jin Zixuan: oh no Lan Wangji: I take it you had your first Family Dinner. Lan Wangji: I apologize for the lapse.

Jiang Cheng has no explanation for the way rope quiets the noise in his head, the endless imprecations his own internal voice hurls at him. He settles on his own couch, ties himself up, and reads.

modern au Lotus Pier is a company that Jiang Fengmian and Yu Ziyuan started together when they got married

JIANG CHENG: I’m passing the phone to someone who once did a cannonball into the lake before ever learning how to swim and puked up water for a week.