"God, life is so unfair. I find what appears to be the sole personal teleportation device in the city, it decides it likes you, and what do you do with it? Save the city with a stunning feat of bravery and tactical prowess? No. You don't even bring me coffee--you use it to increase your repertoire of juvenile humour with a prank that three-year-olds have been carrying off successfully without teleportation probably for centuries."

Atlantis was a neutral colony before it became a prison camp, split between the mainland facilities and the ocean bound city itself for the war criminals and those convicted of crimes against humanity.

Rodney tells Santa what he wants for Christmas. Twenty years later, he finally gets it.

“What does he think we are, Fine Arts majors?” Rodney demanded.

After a meeting of the minds in a bar in Colorado Springs, John and Rodney embark on some family visits. Driving, drinking and other fun activities ensue.

When John Sheppard's father dies, he finds himself faced with an estranged brother, runaway Replicators, and a budding relationship with the ever-complex, frequently annoying Rodney McKay. There is only so much a guy can take before reaching his breaking point.

Harlequin AU (no Stargate). Kaleb's long gone, Jeannie's got a career, Madison has problems, Rodney's got Inner Power!, and Sheppard. . . is pretty much the same. Warnings: reference to the verbal abuse of a child and physical violence; Ford and Jeannie misbehave

A story about the benefits of cultural exchange, contraception, the downsides to television stardom, and what counts as pre-watershed in the Pegasus galaxy.

Of all the ways Rodney McKay had imagined fucking John Sheppard...never had a single fantasy included both an audience and taking turns with his teammates.

Badfic Summary Mini-Ficathon entry, for [info]kalpurna's summary: "When Rodney starts exhibiting strange symptoms, Dr. Beckett discovers something odd about his genetic makeup. Now Rodney must find a mate -- before his alien side chooses for him. Warnings: wingfic, tentacles (NC-17)."

Because sometimes there are accidental orgies.

Earth is gone, lost to the Ori and Atlantis has to take a hard look at how to survive now that they're on their own.

Hopeless geek Rodney McKay offers high school quarterback John Sheppard $1000 to make him cool. A story about growing up, finding out who you are, and deciding what you're going to do about it.

John stared down at his hands, a little numbly, watching Rodney wrap the long leather strap over and under his wrists, binding them together.

John, Rodney and a room full of...things.

Another off-world mission, another alien ritual – and suddenly, Rodney has tentacles and needs to mate with his mate – John.

An accident with Ancient technology sucks a John and Rodney from an alternate universe onto Atlantis – and they have very different ideas about sex, marriage and relationships.

"You can't make a sub the military commander of Atlantis," Ford said.

“Colonel John Sheppard knew, from the moment he first met Dr Rodney McKay, that the man would be trouble.” This novel-length story is a prequel to General & Dr Sheppard telling the story of how the AU John and Rodney first got together.

Rodney and John have been in a relationship for years, despite all the difficulties that arise when two subs with no dominant tendencies try to have a relationship. When Jennifer Keller arrives on Atlantis, the two of them decide that things are going to change.

John wakes up in someone else’s body.

"Hey—Elton John wants his planet back!"

Comment-fic for eliade, prompt: John/Rodney--slavery slavery slavery SLAVERY.

Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans.

Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans.

"You're not a very good Jedi, are you?" the Sith Lord said. "Oh, excuse me, I am an excellent Jedi," Rodney said.

For svmadelyn's badfic-summary challenge, summary from hyperfocused: Rodney MmmKay's mother always told him smart boys never get the hot guys. Can he pretend to be dumb so hunky pilot John Shep Hard will ask him to the Atlantis: Under the Sea prom? W/ my OC Princess Ancienta. Warnings: ANGST M/M plz rd/rvw Oh, yeah.

"Let's go with Banach-Tarski as your safeword," McKay says almost absently, lips tracing lazily along John's hairline, and John blinks. // "You want to go with a Euclidean geometric paradox for my safeword?" he asks, bemused.

John had gotten kind of blasé about offworld travel.

Rule # 1: For every scientist, there is a grunt who loves them.

"And then the door chimed, and Woolsey came in looking mournful and anxious, and everything got derailed.Death and life, hope and hopelessness, aren't just for the Pegasus galaxy. Eventually, inevitably, it's going to happen on Earth. John and Rodney, loss and family and what it means to be home."

"Hardcore BDSM, that's easy. Hickeys, though. Hickeys are hard."

Rodney had been trained for his position from near infancy. He had excelled in his studies and been selected for the apprenticeship over candidates twice his age. Now, years later, Rodney held the second most powerful position in the village. There was no one else who could do what he did. That didn’t make it any less meaningless.

The hammock was something he'd done more or less on a whim, liking the idea of it more than really expecting to use it. It's not like Rodney is much of an escape-for-a-nap in the middle of the day kind of guy, let alone a sleep-outside-with-the-bugs-and-risk-the-likelihood-of-slowly-developing-skin-cancer kind of guy.

"They all think I’m your boyfriend anyway," John said. "Yes, so? You are my boyfriend," Rodney said. "Why is this a problem?" "They thought I was before I even was!" John yelled.

In his rational mind, Rodney knew that following a girl who'd dumped you was really, really pathetic.

It was just Rodney's luck that the guy with the strongest expression of the ATA gene on Earth was some lanky alpha who couldn't follow an order as basic as "don't touch anything."