The Stone has many names and many forms, and they seek it in many ways....

The morning after. Al gets answers, Ed gets suspicious, and Roy gets busy.

They say the third time's the charm...

“The problem is that they expect you. And I would prefer you didn’t destroy half the city getting in.”

"You can't do that! This is a shounen series!" he hissed.

"Just talking and showing won't help much. He needs to try things before he can get them right."

Rebecca was getting bored with Central.

On some level, Roy knew that marriage would be a good career move.

Ed's scowl deepens. "Want us to leave and come back when we aren't virgins anymore?"

The Full Metal Alchemist, of course, accepted his assignment with all the gravity due his station.

Reeling from his own setback, Roy takes the time to advise a strange golden-eyed kid in a bar...

Fifty one-sentence chunks of an Avatar/FMA crossover. Basic idea is that after some implied (non-canon) craziness in Amestris, Ed and restored!Al find themselves lost in a desert, under stars they don't recognize and with only the vaguest memories of how they got there.

Ed did precisely that, yanking down his shirt and attempting to close his jacket around what was a quite fine, if a bit incongruent, pair of breasts.

Roy looked down at his coffee, but he'd stopped letting Hawkeye make it, so he couldn't blame it on that.

You got respect when you were the Flame Alchemist, but it was nothing compared to a man with claws and the will to use them.

Slinking closer, Roy took a deep breath and then another.

On a less horrible note! This is one of the promised FMA/DGM crossovers—some DGM characters flung randomly into FMA-verse. *eyes fic dubiously* So the world of Fullmetal Alchemist is pretty sane, balanced, and logical. Sure, things are bad sometimes, things are complicated sometimes, but they make sense. And are usually, I don’t know, indefinably wholesome. DGM, meanwhile, is such a sick, twisted, chaotic crazy-factory that there are no words. Fitting them together: fun times. Also, Ed and Allen in the same room, BEST THING EVER. XD

You can always tell it’s Sunday by the yelling from the Elric house.

Fixing Al.

As far as Edward was concerned it could just take for-damn-ever if it wanted because that’s how long he could go without taking to the Bastard.

Of course, the jar was really the professional female companionship fund; or, as Ed liked to sarcastically call it, the pussy kitty.

Endorphins then, that's what he's been missing.

Fullmetal was starting to turn slightly purple, now, which definitely clashed with his coloring...

The sheer naughtiness of it all was unexpectedly exciting, and she found herself trembling even before the cold steel met her skin.

"I can be anyone you want," He'd said, a little too quickly, a little too flatly. "I can be anything you want-" It was, Hawkeye decided, the least enthusiastic proposition she had ever received.

It's like this. I was warning folks that I hadn't yet watched the last handful of eppies for FMA, and that if anyone spoiled me, they'd have to die loud and painful. So of course people decided to "spoil" me. Like how, in ep 51, Roy gets his WINGS and Ed is stabbed with SCARY GREEN ICE STUFF, and Seifer CRIES. Yes. Yes, it's FF8. DIE, PEOPLE. *hearts*

"Is this your first time?" Olivier has never slept with a virgin.

“You’ve heard the rumors,” Mustang says, looking at Ed over the top of his latest report, “about the angels.” Ed scoffs and rolls his eyes, “Angels don’t exist, don’t be ridiculous.” “Of course, of course,” he murmurs, gaze sliding back down, “There have been multiple eye witness accounts, however.” Ed slouches into the chair and doesn’t bother to keep the contempt to from his voice when he says, “Don’t depend on anything with wings to save you. Things that were made to leave always end up doing so, in the end.” “Yes, well,” he says, “sometimes they come back.”

FMA best case scenario. But the Elrics, even at peace and completely happy in themselves, are still kind of alarming to bystanders.

Once Edward became legal, the number of office outings to the pub went up exponentially. Possibly this was because Edward was really fun to take to a pub.

The irresistible troll vs. the immovable hothead - fight!

Maes wakes up in the Elemental Countries after his death, and promptly gets into trouble. Genma gets him out of it.

Roy growing up with Madame Christmas means he grew up in a brothel. Explains a lot.

Riza takes such immense joy in ruining Roy's life that he can't even bring himself to begrudge her.

Roy gets significantly more than he bargained for with a pair of gold-eyed prostitutes.

Greed is definitely not where he used to be, and the fact that he’s alive was a big clue there. Not like there’s been any research done on what happens to a Homunculus when they die, but Greed had rather been expecting nonexistence. “Well, fuck,” he says, and hopes that Father’s end was as painful as Edward’s imagination could make it.

Edward, Tobirama, some accidental dimension travel, and questions of methodology. Plus snark.

In a world where soulmates can feel the other's pain, being Edward Elric's comes with a whole host of problems.

The Akatsuki are hired to separate a certain prince from a certain homonculus. It doesn't go quite as planned for anyone involved.

I like to daydream about Mustang and Ed's stupid adventures in diplomacy after they've taken control of the country. Emphasis on stupid. Ed is trans because 1) because and 2) silentwalrus' headcanons have seeped into the groundwater at this point.

Something explodes on Promised Day.

Sabo and Koala visit Amestris and take back a souvenir which is fortunate because Ace really needs all the help he can get after his brush with Akainu. Or Ace becomes a merman because of reasons.