Anonymous asked: Pern dragons! Dave/Jade/Karkat! Yeah!

Anonymous asked: JohnKat urban fantasy ((that was so vaaaague aaaaaaaa urban fantasy had so many possibilities D: i went with one of the silliest because i could, bwahaha.))

Anonymous asked: John/Jade/Karkat - John and Jade are demon summoners (for reasons) trying to call up an incubus/succubus (for reasons). They get Karkat.

duosthefangirl asked: College AU where Karkat and Equius are dating and Karkat ends up accidentally admitting that he loves Equius' hair to the point of it nearly being a kink. mixed with Anonymous asked: Equikat, everyone’s a dom or sub AU.

Stiles doesn't think it's a problem. After all, what are the odds that it'll come after him? It's not like he's the only virgin left in Beacon Hills! And it's not like people are lining up to help him out, either...

She hasn’t had a partner-assisted orgasm in over a week and a half, and she is just beyond done. She wants to lie down on the cold bathroom floor and cry. Derek is starting to look like a permanently kicked puppy. “Look,” she tells him after dinner, “I love your inner self and your personality or whatever, but can I just tie you up and use your body until I come a couple times?” Derek fumbles the sudsy glass in his hand. “Awesome!” Stiles says brightly.

Derek sighs, envisioning Stiles pulling a file out of the nightstand and ruining whatever mood they might have managed to capture completely. What Stiles has in his hands when he turns back around is definitely not a file, though. Instead, it’s thick and black, curved into a wicked-looking c-shape with a small bullet vibrator jutting out of one end. “That is not what I was expecting,” Derek admits honestly. “Yeah, I can tell, you’re turning,” Stiles gestures to his own face, “you’re kind of, um, pink.”

Stiles makes a cyber sex buddy who supposedly looks like a dark-haired version of his favorite character on his favorite show. Which, coincidentally enough, is also what Derek looks a hell of a lot like.

Another kinkmeme story.

Derek maintains this wouldn't be an issue if Stiles would just learn to knock.

“Ah, yeah, Desiree, I told you I was meeting someone. Well, that someone is Derek. My boyfriend. We’re totally in love.” His heart was racing and Derek was holding him so tight it was difficult to turn enough to face the young woman. What he did see of her had his breath catching on fishhooks in his throat. She was normally a relatively pretty girl, with cute round cheeks and large dark eyes, but in that moment she looked…terrifying. Her cheeks seemed gaunt, her eyes glowing like they were little windows peeking into a deep pit of raging flame. (Or: Five or so years after the show. Stiles is in college, and finds himself getting stalked by a succubus. Derek's determined that the best way to thwart her is to prove that he and Stiles are madly in love. It's not really as much of an act as either seems to think.)

Derek as a tactile study guide for Stiles. Written for a prompt by descendingspiral on Tumblr, who asked for: Stiles needs to focus on studying for his Anatomy class. Derek volunteers his body.

Stiles starts bringing drumsticks to Pack gatherings, sitting himself on the edge of the group to tap out maddening rhythms on his knees as the werewolves train. The first time he’d pulled them out, spinning one stick in a showy twirl between his fingers, Derek had actually staggered a little, missed a basic move, and ended up on his back blinking up at fucking Jackson, of all people.

Derek goes away to deal with a hostile rival pack, and Stiles calls him up to settle his nerves. “Ah, you feeling a bit stressed out big guy?” “Yes,” he says, voice raspy. “It’s okay. I’m going to take care of you right now."

Alternate Title: "Dick Failwolf, Private Eye." (Or, Derek's hit with a Film Noir curse, which forces him to narrate his own life in luridly-detailed prose.)

"If the anchor is a person,” Stiles reads from Lydia's neat notes, “a werewolf may be assisted by carrying a token of their flesh near them at all times. The more intimate the offering, the better."

Stiles accidentally finds a trunk full of Derek's professional dom gear from when he lived in New York. They don't talk about it. Then Stiles turns eighteen, and they do.

So the first time Stiles got Derek on his back, worked him open and pressed inside with the long exhale of a perfect fit, he wasn't expecting the sound. Sure when they exchange handjobs, or blowjobs, or any other kind of orgasm, Derek can get a little vocal – sometimes even demanding in a hesitant sort of way – but the deep moans, the sharp grunts, the cursing and the constant use of Stiles' name was not expected.

Derek always gets stuck between making too much noise or just gasping silently. He knows he’d been making noise earlier; when Stiles walked them both into the bedroom he’d been humming into kisses and mumbling dry responses to Stiles saying he “had plans”; when Stiles tugged at his clothes he remembers he’d said something meant to pass for controlled about patience that had made Stiles roll his eyes. And when Stiles pulled his mouth off Derek’s dick with a slurp so lewd it had to be at least half on purpose and told him to roll over with his voice gone rough, Derek’s sure he’d breathed out, “Yeah. Yeah okay.”

How had you never noticed how lovely Karkat looked when he was all good and pissed off? With that intense scowl on his face and bared teeth and irritatingly loud voice.

Homo sapiens domesticus Humans (Homo sapiens domesticus) are short-lived primates of the family Hominidae, and the only existant species of the genus Homo. They originated in Africa, and spread to other continents of planet Earth within a megavorn. While fractious and warlike in their wild state, they are easily trained to a useful function.

Always respect strangers, for they may not be what they seem.

After being tortured by a group of hunters, Derek goes into heat. Stiles helps him through it. Written for the 24-hour porn challenge community, Stop, Drop, and Howl.

Show of hands, who didn’t read it as a porn prompt? anyone? anyone? bueller? Contains sort-of-public sex, oral and penetrative sex, some slurry retention.

Dummy discovers self-expression through sculpture.

Steve Rogers discovers the Grinch, but he already knew Dr. Seuss...

Sex gas, Latveria, and a SHIELD orgy.

In which Tony Stark is training John Sheppard for another mouthy scientist, far in his future.

After the defeat of Aizen, Ichigo has lost his superpowers but not his skills so he's been hiring himself out to any sports team looking for a strong player. When Nagisa Hazuki approaches Ichigo to join the Iwatobi High School Swimming Club, something piques Ichigo's interest....

*Could we have more of the arranged marriage ficlet? Pretty please? *Oh goodness is it too late to ask for a wedding night continuation? Are these prompts still a thing?? *DaveKat: First time ( could be continuation of other prompt or not) Karkat has mad bedroom skills and Dave tries to keep his cool. * Arranged Marriage Ficlet! Tomorrow! Deverginizing Dave

CG: BY THE WAY. CG: I SERIOUSLY HOPE YOU HAVE NOT A) DRAGGED ME INTO SOME VAMPIRES/WEREWOLVES OR VAMPIRES/HUNTERS WAR, AND B) FORGOTTEN I MIGHT CARE TO BE TOLD IF YOU WERE AT WAR WITH ANY ASSHOLES OUT HERE AND *IN DEATHLY DANGER.*

There's a part of Derek that he hates most of all - it's only caused him trouble. He pushes people away and finds a workaround and it's fine, until the day Stiles goes searching through his things.

Derek didn't mean to nod off during home room, but he'll be eternally grateful he did. And so will his family, if his warning can get to them in time.

Jonny reads. Jonny reads plenty. Jonny is college educated (sort of) and Sharpy can suck his dick, because he reads all the fucking time, okay. Except, see, he sort of doesn’t, and then Sharpy challenged him to a book club, and how do you even do that, book clubs aren’t supposed to have winners, but apparently the Blackhawks Book Club will, and PR is trying to make a thing out of it to encourage literacy and promote the library system in the city or something, so the whole team and a lot of the staff have to go find and read this book, and basically what all this means is that it’s a week before Christmas and Jonathan Toews is grumbling to himself and scowling at a shelf in the library like he wants it to be set on fire, because the shelf is missing the book he’s supposed to be reading for this stupid club that he is going to win. “Can I help you find something?” someone asks, and Jonny jumps.

Weird and comfortable aren't mutually exclusive; Steve Rogers is going to do exactly what he wants this Christmas.

One of Pepper’s favorite activities after a long day is putting on sci-fi movies and watching Tony dissect their bad science. He’ll happily spend two hours curled up against her and ranting about the flawed central plan in Armageddon and how REALLY, HE HOPES AN ASTEROID HEADS FOR EARTH, HE’LL SHOW HOLLYWOOD HOW TO REALISTICALLY AVOID AN EXTINCTION-LEVEL EVENT, DAMMIT. Pepper finds it oddly relaxing, like angry genius white noise. Add in Bruce, and she could sell tickets.

Pepper is BFFs with one of Neal Caffrey’s aliases because ~art luv~ and they meet and hijinks with Extremis and theft.

Sakura spends a year in Narnia. Susan watches, and does her best to help.

Look at me, Skye thought, but the creepy telepathic bio-engineering that had been going on in the basement of tonight's party clearly hadn't rubbed off on her.

noviblue asked: 1. Bro/Signless (my rarepair

It's hard being a graduate student, trying to write a thesis, create a revolutionary computer program, or prove the existence of dragons while living in a shitty apartment with your two girlfriends. It's hard, but at least your girlfriends understand.

Oshie really wants Kaner to measure Jonny's dick.

An alternative future for Cordelia who has just returned from the higher dimensions. AtS/Leverage Crossover

"After multiple times of people trying to use him as a virgin sacrifice, Tim decides it's time to lose his V-card. Enter Kon-el."

It startles him to see a human shape on his altar tonight.

The camera zooms in on the face of a very beautiful woman who looks vaguely familiar. “Who’s the babe?” Stiles jokes, turning to look over at Derek. “My mom,” Derek replies with a glare. “Oh, shit, dude, I’m sor—” Stiles breaks off his apology as his eyes drift back towards the screen. Beside Mrs. Hale is another familiar face. One he hasn’t seen in a long time. His mother.

Though if Hiccup had to be completely honest, he wasn’t here for the lecture. Something something boring matrices; right, like that was going to pull him out of bed. Such riveting stuff. No, the only reason that Hiccup was here at this ungodly hour and willing to put up with the droning from the professor was for the guy he sat next to.

Jack Frost and Steve Rogers go way back. Written for prompt on avengerkink, vague spoilers for Rise of the Guardians.

Derek’s body works differently tonight.

Brian has hidden his submissive orientation most of his life out of necessity more than desire and he's been fine. Really. Until he meets Dominic Toretto then fine doesn't really fit the situation anymore. A BDSM-universe AU of The Fast and the Furious.