“You okay with this?” Han might have been asking him, or Leia. Probably both. Leia looked between them, a little smile tugging at one corner of her mouth. “I’m willing to share.” “Luke?” There was probably some common sense argument to be made against sleeping with both of them--but hell, he’d been blowing past the common sense arguments against sleeping with Leia for months now. He slowly nodded. “Y--” he cleared his throat. “Yeah.”

Back at home, when he has time to examine it more closely, it quickly becomes obvious why this ritual never turned up in all his early research. It's not a typical soul summoning ritual. It's not a cultivation ritual at all; as Nie Huaisang puzzles through it, the closest category he can put it in is folk magic...not only that, but sex magic.

Modern AU: Nie Huaisang is at University, studying business (as is his duty) rather than Fine Arts (his passion). He is also, however, moonlighting as a photographic artist anonymously posting a series of high-end erotic self portraits, under the nom de guerre of FanBoy, in which his face is never visible. He's posting porn online, basically. But it's none of your trashy amateur shit - it's GORGEOUS. Nie Mingjue has a certain "type" (the details of which he chooses very carefully not to reflect upon) and as such he very swiftly becomes the number one fan of this mysterious photographer/model. Identity porn and actual porn and angst and more porn ensue.

It starts with a curse, Jin Guangyao’s last revenge, seeking to tarnish what he could never touch. Lan Xichen is prepared to die from it, if he must, taking the shame of it to his grave. He doesn’t expect his brother’s lover to figure out the situation, let alone that Wei Wuxian might be their best hope of dealing with the curse in a way that leaves all three of them with their self-respect intact. And he certainly doesn’t expect being slowly, carefully drawn into their relationship, and learning how to live again.

Lan Xichen stares at his brother, pure and untouched. His brother, who has never panted with want and come undone under anyone’s hands, not even his own. His brother, who is asking so sweetly and innocently, to be taught.

The fault, Nie Mingjue thinks later, lies squarely with the blasted weather.

Wei Ying isn't sure how it came to this—how Lan Zhan fucking her while Wei Ying babbles about getting pregnant turned into Wei Ying babbling about Lan Xichen getting her pregnant for Lan Zhan, while Lan Zhan fucks her. Talking about being pregnant during sex is nothing new for her. She and Lan Zhan have been married for three years now, and along with settling down in the Cloud Recesses, they've settled into their marriage and what they like best in bed. Wei Ying isn't even embarrassed about it anymore; not when Lan Zhan loves it so much. Wei Ying and Lan Zhan share fantasies and plan for a baby.

MDZS ships, and a headcanon for each one

Nie Huaisang would do anything to help his brother. Now he knows the very thing required, and it forces every choked, desperate thought to the surface. Everything hiding beneath 'Da-ge smiled at me' rises forcefully up through him so that his mouth is filled with the taste of wanting. Yes, Nie Huaisang would do anything to help his brother, but especially this.

Xichen's cheeks are flushed a pale pink and it suddenly occurs to Mingjue that Xichen isn't doing that fancy Lan technique of using his core to evaporate the alcohol before it can affect him. Which means Xichen wants to get drunk. Which means only bad things for Mingjue, generally. Good, but very bad things.

"Tell me about what I need to do," Qin Su says, steeling herself, forcing her anxiety down. She doesn't have a choice, she has to put aside her fears and do this. Jin Guangyao scoops back strands of her hair and twists them deftly into braids. "It can't be too scripted, or he won't believe it. Nie Mingjue values honesty and forthrightness, and despises liars and schemers." Qin Su exhales sharply at the confirmation of what she'd already known, the potential danger that lies ahead. "So I need to seduce him without letting him know I'm seducing him?" [Fix-it AU in which QS finds out the truth of her parentage and plots with JGY to get her a husband. Things Ensue.]

Wei Ying’s gaze is so intent on his face, Lan Wangji can feel it, even without looking him in the eye. Wei Ying can read him so well. Almost as well as . . . Lan Wangji swallows. Even thinking the name feels like a dishonor in this moment, as his body is humming and pulsing at the familiar, much-trodden path his thoughts are slipping down.

Huaisang ran his fingers up over Mingjue’s thigh and abdomen, smoothing in slow circles as he spoke, “Just relax, Da-ge. I’ll take good care of you.”

In the end, there isn’t much of a discussion. With the sabre spirit boiling in Mingjue’s blood, it has to be Huaisang. Huaisang has regular courses, has never actually been stabbed or tortured on the field of battle. They know their duty to the family. If Mingjue can’t risk a child, Huaisang will do it. But she's not doing it alone.

Huaisang pulls against the heavy, taut drape of the hanfu’s collar and the layers underneath, revealing barely a triangle of his pale clavicle and shoulder as he fans himself from the heat. It’s a tantalizing strip of skin, and before Mingjue can drag his eyes away, the glint of silver catches his gaze. Is that - ? Mingjue only gets a glimpse. Nestled between Huaisang’s skin and the gauzy white inner robe, there’s a strip of silver-black. A strap. A - a bra strap. It burns at the back of his mind for hours, like an ember in the dark, a glow he can see even with his eyes closed. What is Huaisang hiding, underneath all those layers?

Qin Su is finally going to sleep with her new boyfriend the coming weekend. She likes to look immaculate when she has sex with someone for the first time. Perfume, nice lingerie and all that. Unfortunately the place she usually goes to for her bikini waxes is fully booked.

Meng Yao had spent years not thinking of Jin Zixuan as anything other than an obstacle in the way of his ultimate goal – his father’s recognition, himself as the heir and eventual master of Lanling Jin – and he bitterly resented Wen Ruohan for trashing all that effort. It was impossible to think that way with Jin Zixuan shivering in front of him, chained down to the floor of the palace within the Nightless City. And yet, it was equally impossible to act to save him - Or was it?

“Don’t worry A-Cheng, this is the kind of party that expects everyone to be using fake names. It would be horribly against the rules for anyone to acknowledge who you actually are, even if they do recognise either of you. Trust me, there will be far more interesting things going on than watching Chifeng-zun and Sandu Shengshou tonight. All you have to do is play it cool, make it seem like you’re there for the same reasons as everyone else, and nobody will meet your eyes. Piece of cake!” Huaisang sounds positively chipper, which means Jiang Cheng is almost certainly going to have the worst night of his life tonight. Or: Jiang Cheng and Nie Mingjue steal a sex party

It doesn’t occur to him to ask what helping would entail until Mikey gives him a sideways look. “Don’t think it’s the kind of help you should ask your brother for,” he says. “But thanks.” Gerard tries to think of something he wouldn’t help Mikey do, but there’s nothing. He’d drive a getaway car, bury a body, even give him bone marrow, and he’s seen the needles they use to get at that shit. “There’s no such thing,” he says. Mikey shrugs, picks up an ad for lipstick and starts tearing around the edge of the logo. “It’s kind of a sex thing,” he mumbles.

The first time Jin Guangshan mentioned it, Jin Guangyao felt a great surge of relief – at last, he thought. At last someone else that isn’t me notices it!

Connor honestly doesn’t mean to snoop.

Taylor loves it, everyone watching while he fucks himself on Adam’s dick and Adam’s hands are tight on his hips while he tells Taylor how good he looks, how everyone wants to be where Adam is. He loved it back in juniors and it’s even better now.

If Connor was a good person - if he was a Good Simple Boring Canadian Boy - he wouldn’t watch his best friend get fucked by his older brother.

But then Jordie puts his weight more heavily on top of him and something switches, and it’s like all the fear is draining out of Jamie’s body. His arms and legs and stomach go calm and floaty. Jordie’s heavy, but Jamie doesn’t feel the weight anymore. It just feels so good.

Jamie’s always known his girlfriend has a dirty mind.

“Maybe you should practice on me,” Jordie says.

“Nick,” Marcus whimpers out after a long silence, the two of them just staring at each other. “Fuck. Does it stop hurting?” “I told you to ask me things,” Nick says, and he’s trying to not lose himself right now, but it’s a struggle. “And also like—Jesus, kiddo, don’t wipe the slick on the shared towels after you shower.”

Dylan is his brother. Ryan loves him, and it’s ordinary. One slip doesn’t mean anything. The complicated dreams he’s had since the trip are rare. He has it under control.

Gendry gets invited back for drinks with his boyfriend and his boyfriend's cousin and his boyfriend's cousin's boyfriend, and then things get... out of hand.

"It's not like he's noticing anything you're doing. Face it Greyjoy: when he's on top like that, you could be anyone in the world and he'd enjoy fucking himself on you just as much.” In which Theon is easily manipulated, Jon is a smug git about it, and Robb would like to get off at some point.

Neither Jon nor Robb will ever be what they want to, but Robb will let Jon treat him as such, anyway.

Jon joins his king, and brother, in bed. And his queen.

Jason moves his limp cock out of the way before spreading his lips wide with two fingers. His hole flutters, and off-white come drips down his perineum. "Whoops," he deadpans. "Looks like I've been naughty, Daddy." Bruce hums. He rolls back his sleeves before stepping forward. "Who did this to you, baby?" Jason's grin is positively feral when he answers: "Dick."

“You let me go, I will find a ship and sail away,” Aegon pleaded. “Never to be found.”

Just once, when the trade to Dallas is announced, Tyler forgets to give a shit and asks Brownie if he can read it. Maybe that’ll cheer him up in fucking Texas, he thinks, but Brownie just stares. “Never seen those kinda letters before, dude. Like, that’s not even an alphabet that exists, I bet.” Then he seems to remember that this is Tyler’s soulmark they’re talking about. “Sorry, man. I have no idea. Sucks.”