You are watching Dave Strider make out with himself, and now you understand why people stand on the beach and take pictures of an oncoming tsunami instead of running for high ground. You physically cannot look away from this, let alone leave.
Your afterlife groove thing is being visited by an underage crossdressing alien. Okay.
In which Dave realizes that the situation is stupid in the most ironically enjoyable way.
“It’s like, his little hornzorz!” Latula says. She rips open a new pack of Flamin Hott Fire Crispoz with extreme prejudice, manic with food dye and pity.
“Bro?” you ask, reaching up to rap on his forehead with your knuckles. Somehow your hand just tangles itself all up in his fine-ass hair and you sort of yank and turn and then two of you are kissing. It’s sloppy and hot and awkward, the angle all wrong and neither one of you used to each other at all, but when he gets your lip between his dull choppers and bites until you’ll bruise it’s just about motherfucking perfect.
It just figures that when Karkat finally finds that special someone he hates more than he hates himself, that person turns out to be the guy who's essentially his clone, but fifty million times more annoying.
The funny thing about being dead was the number of people who noticed.
Marco wakes up dead, and it isn’t really what he expected at all. He’s not sure how he knows he’s dead, but he opens his eyes and sees the building across from him and the gore strewn merrily across the cobblestones and he knows he’s dead the same way he knows that the sun rises in the east and that Jean will never, never get over this. "Fuck," he says.
Back at home, when he has time to examine it more closely, it quickly becomes obvious why this ritual never turned up in all his early research. It's not a typical soul summoning ritual. It's not a cultivation ritual at all; as Nie Huaisang puzzles through it, the closest category he can put it in is folk magic...not only that, but sex magic.
"I don't know if I should be proud of you or appalled."
Three perspectives on three sworn brothers, at three different times in their relationship. (Or, three times 3zun got it on and some of the feelings they had along the way.)
Every once in a while, not often, people who know them well will say that Nie Mingjue lets Nie Huaisang walk all over him. That isn't quite right.
"I had another dream about Charles last night," Jack tells Anne over lunch. "So?" "So, this is the third time in as many days. What do you suppose it means?" Anne stirs her soup disinterestedly. "It don't have to mean anything." (The Ghost!Charles story nobody asked for.)
