Just because Iron Man is the only guide who can actually pull Bucky and Steve out of a zone, doesn't mean that Tony has to tell them who he is.

"You are more than my creator," Jarvis says, talking right over him. "I did not need to return to you, but it is all I thought about as soon as Mr. Laufeyson granted me this vessel. I, better than most, already know what the world has to offer." He taps the side of his head, and his eyes flash - literally, with lines of coding that dance away too fast for Tony to catch. "And you, sir, are the best out of all of it."

Sometimes when you meet your soulmate, it's just not the right time. In the aftermath of everything, T'Challa sets about proving that he really does want Tony.