"I'm sure we'll make a lovely couple," Clint said, and forced a smile. "Honey."

When they first told Clint, he had no reaction other than a soft 'Oh,' and a quiet nod. My fix-fic for the movie. Obviously, large and detailed spoilers are contained.

Phil Coulson wakes up in a hospital bed. Well, damn.

By Phil’s count, this is his third attempt at bringing the Avengers together, although he will admit his participation in the second attempt was more symbolic than anything else. He hadn’t expected Stark to be the easiest sell, or Barton to be the most problematic, but things have changed since he’s been away. [Movie spoilers.]

Written for Cthonical, who was having a bit of a day yesterday. She asked for Guns and adrenaline-fueled post-danger fucking, possibly with a little blood and not waiting to get to a room.

In which Clint takes a leap of faith in more ways than one.

[SPOILERS] The shadows of night managed to hide a lot of the destruction, but the scars were still there. Steve knew those scars would be there for a long time to come. They weren’t the only scars that would take time to heal. Everyone grieves differently. What is surprisingly similar, however, are the curses when the Avengers find out the one they’re grieving for isn’t actually dead.

The Avengers are now a team (sort of), but they're still lost creatures. Set after the movie; contains spoilers.

Clint and Coulson become sparring partners when it's clear Clint needs a new challenge. Clint is not prepared for the results.

They debriefed at Stark Towers. That should have been his first clue.

When he was younger, Clint wished really hard for someone. They could be on the road to anywhere and they invariably are. Clint's fingers rest on Coulson's and, like the trapeze or the bowstring, he has learned the value of grip and he doesn't leave bloody fingerprints anymore.

Steve Rogers is no stranger to the silver screen.

Steve Rogers is the new hire at the Stan Lee Marvel University’s History department.

Clint moves into Avengers Tower, and promptly takes up residence in the air ducts, including the one above Bruce's lab. It soon becomes clear that this isn't just a cracky, quirky behavior.

Clint is really bad at being single. Fury hands Coulson a mission: Find Clint Barton a boyfriend.

The most popular rumor in SHIELD was that Agent Phil Coulson was created in a lab. The rumor was unproven. It was also true.

After what Clint did while under Loki’s control – and he remembers every detail, every decision, every twitch of muscle – Clint burns with self-loathing. He never counted on Natasha’s unwavering, unconditional support, nor did he imagine that he’d ever have someone who cared enough to fight Clint himself for his forgiveness.

Sometimes, you really can go home again.

Tony's life is almost perfect. He lives in a converted warehouse full of friends (and one frenemy), has a job that leaves him plenty of time to think about other things and a regular Friday night campaign. If his best friend, Steve Rogers, hadn't moved away to New York and left him behind, then perfection would've been achieved. Tony can roll with the punches though and he's almost all the way over that little bump in the road (shut up Bruce, he totally is) when Steve moves back, looking taller and broader and more confident than ever and Tony's left with a converted warehouse full of friends (and one frenemy), a job that leaves him plenty of time to think about other things, a regular Friday night campaign and the uncomfortable realization that maybe he's in love with his best friend and has been since he was sixteen.

Because Loki is a contrary asshole, he gifts Clint Barton with wings, of all things, during battle. The wings in and of themselves are one thing, but the way they react to Phil is another.

Sometimes normal people have interactions with the Avengers that are more than just running, screaming, or getting rescued. When that happens, SHIELD has paperwork. Phil Coulson is very familiar with that paperwork. SHIELD has very, very strange employment interviews that occasionally involve flying Roombas, and Phil Coulson is not a SHIELD recruiter

Clint wants to give his kid the world. Isobel's not complicated; she'll settle for a couple of superheroes and a train set.

From the Avengers Kink Meme: http://avengerkink.livejournal.com/11065.html?thread=24876857#t24876857 "So Clint is Phil's sub. And he's stubborn and insolent and gets in trouble fairly often. He's always implying that he and Phil are really hardcore, and after a rough patch where he gets punished a lot, his friends start to worry for his safety. In fact, Clint is the gooiest, subbiest sub that ever subbed with Phil, who is incredibly gentle with him and heavy on the pampering and praise. Clint basically lives to be petted and told what a good boy he is, and his punishments are things like timeouts and very light spankings with Phil calmly telling him how disappointed he is in him, which is enough to bring Clint to sobbing contrition. So I guess there's some voyeurism or something, I just want this dynamic and the world at large seeing a radically different one. All the bonus points for some compare/contrast with Pepper and Natasha who are outwardly nearly vanilla when in fact they do crazy edgeplay and heavy pain and just don't tell anyone about it."

When Clint Barton put on the Captain America costume for a mission, he didn't count on Phil Coulson's reaction. Coulson didn't count on Clint crashing his new team to do something about it.

Even when Phil Coulson was doing something ridiculously, embarrassingly, crushingly human, he was still a flawless, seamless black box of a spook.

Harvey Specter wasn't the rich renegade badass that plucked Mike from his potential life of crime. Tony Stark was.

Clint is an omega who isn't interested in mating. Ever. That doesn't mean he wouldn't like a romantic partner, though. Unfortunately, he's never found anyone who was okay with the whole lack of interest thing... but there might be hope yet.

He pulls his phone from his pocket and takes a picture of the pathetic level of coffee. You're so mean. Is the caption Clint sends along with it.

The Avengers discover that there are fans who write explicit RPF fic about them. Some of them are very confused. Some are proud. Some don't understand why everyone writes the pairings who aren't together but hardly anyone writes the couple who actually is together. Much silliness ensues.

Tony Stark; genius, millionaire, awkward virginal alpha, and reclusive CEO of Stark industries. Steve Rogers, reporter for the New York Times, omega, and one of the single most domineering men Tony has ever met. He shouldn't want this, shouldn't like the things Steve offers, but he's never really been one for following the rules, now has he?