or : In Which Dave Strider Is An Asexual Transsexual Off To Room With His Best Internet Friend John Egbert, Who Is Initially Unaware Of Dave’s Trans Status, While They Both Attend Western Washington University. Co-Starring Rose Lalonde As Dave’s Nosy And Also Identical And Cisexual Lesbian Twin Sister, And Karkat Vantas And Sollux Captor As Particularly Irritating Suite Mates. Featuring All The Trolls As Humans, Jade And Jake As John’s Gun Wielding Genius Cousins, And Dirk “Bro” Strider As The Hardest Character To Write. Also Includes Stupid Pranks, Second Hand Details, A Handful Of Sexuality Crisises, A Number Of Awkward Crushes Of Varying Levels Of Platonic, Flirting With Varying Levels Of Success, Instances Of Sloppy Makeouts, One Polyamorous Relationship, A Handful Of Lesbians, More Bullshit Than True Facts, And A Summary That Is Apparently Too Long.

Karkat is failing programming, English 101, and laundry. John can smell weakness, and like the best palhoncho he attacks weakness with friendship, relentless and obnoxious friendship. He has, however, delegated all of the butt touching to Jade and Dave.

Your name is Dave Strider and you are 26 years old. You have just gotten engaged. The problem being that you have just gotten engaged to your best male friend in a furious fit of stupidity, champagne, one-upmanship and a weird warm-glowy feeling that occasionally (or more than occasionally) rolls around in the pit of your stomach and makes you act like a moron. You have, over the past 13 years and much careful experimentation, dubbed this “The Egbert Effect”. You would like to state, for the record, that you are definitely, completely and 100% NOT A HOMOSEXUAL. As Bro carefully describes to you what, as the DJ, he’s going to play at the reception (almost entirely a medley of Nicki Minaj and Ke$ha), you carefully nurse a Rock Star and vodka like a 16 year old girl who just popped her cherry at prom and try to figure out what the fuck happened over the past decade or so to land you in this mess.

In which Dave Strider, Karkat Vantas, and John Egbert decide to rent a house near campus pre-furnished to save themselves the unutterable joy of Ikea allen-wrenches, Dave discovers why you should never attempt to move a universe without assistance, and Karkat is the best housemate: it is hands-down no-questions-asked him.

Karter Vantas loses his bus pass and gets a couple of quarters from some random guy, who turns out to be mind-blowingly annoying. To cope with his fiery rage, Karter posts a long-winded, colorful rant on the Missed Connections section of craigslist, and then puts it out of his mind. What ends up happening is the very last thing he ever could have expected: he gets a response.

After Bro takes off for an overseas job, Dave Strider finds himself with a condo, bills, and nary a way to pay for it all. He does what any normal college guy would do; puts up an roommate wanted ad on craigslist. He gets a little bit more than he bargained for... in a very good way.

Sanji doesn't think much will come out of his one-sided crush on the green-haired tiger. After all, he's only seen him a handful of times. At least, until they become roommates.

Arya likes the way things are with her soulmate—playing softball in dreams, talking about nothing and everything. But it still feels like cheating when she dreams of Gendry.

A fic based lightly on a reddit post— "I (21f) have a crush on my roommate (20f). I can't figure out if she actually likes me back or not or is just being friendly. She cooks for me and knows all my favorite foods, and brings me lunch. She buys me anything I want, and her family all joke about our wedding. I once fell asleep on her lap and when I woke up she was stroking my hair and I almost had a stroke. I can't figure out if she's flirting with me or not. Help!"

"请原谅我多情的打扰" Lan Wangji is, for some contrived reason, dragged to a strip club and forced to confront his own repression. Wei Wuxian is, due to Lan Wangji's inexplicably terrible luck, also in his class.

Lan Wangji was dreadfully concerned when he learnt his best friend's brother was a ghoul. Jiang Cheng really wished his brother's new stalker wasn't a dove. Wei Wuxian was just happy his friends and family seemed to care so much about him. No wonder it took them all so long to figure out what Qishan Wen were up too.

The juniors squad gets an apartment together at university and hijinks ensue. Or, how Jingyi and Sizhui finally got their shit together, Zizhen figured himself out, and Jin Ling had a really good time.

A generous allowance from his parents or Wei Wuxian in his life: Jiang Cheng would make the same choice a thousand times over, but his grad school stipend is barely enough to support himself, let alone the two of them. An arrangement with an older man might keep his head above water—if he doesn't wade in too deep.

In which Karkat Vantas' roommate, Dave "straight as a line of coke" Strider, discovers the joys of prostate stimulation. Again. And again. And again.

Andrew and the Idiotic, Thirsty, Ill-advised, Very Off-Limits Crush on his College Roommate's Younger Brother.

Tim Drake stops stalking Gotham’s nocturnal wildlife when she goes to college. Unfortunately, they don’t return the favor.

When Danny gets a scholarship to Gotham University, it's a chance for a new life; a chance to do everything he never could back in Amity. One of those things is exploring his sexuality with whatever willing partners come his way. He honestly didn't mean to sleep his way through most of the Wayne family. Nor did he intend to fall in love with a vigilante crime lord, but hey, that's what happens in Gotham. It's all fine until he's invited to dinner at Wayne Manor.