"Um. I don't know if you noticed, but sometimes I make bad choices about who to trust." Crow tipped his head neutrally. "So that's not my job anymore," Patrick said. "The making choices part. I still do the trusting part. I'm good at that." Or, as described by Petra, the story where Kaner is "like a therapy puppy on a leash, humping people's legs an making them smile."

Huh, was Tony's first thought when the spell broke and all of a sudden his brain came back online.

It starts out ironically, of course, but by the time Dave's wearing a corset and a swanky evening dress and Terezi's in a three-piece suit, Jade wants nothing more than to get them both into bed as soon as possible.

Once upon a time there was virginal, chaste Kagome. And then there wasn't.

“You know what I am?” Kuroo asks. He’s not looking up at Kenma, instead concentrating too much on pushing his shirt up over his chest. …Shit, Kenma owes Shouyou a thousand yen. (( or: shouyou and kenma make a lot of bets, kenma meets a ridiculously handsome stranger, and a ridiculously handsome stranger treats kenma to a night he couldn't forget even if he wanted to. it's a good thing he doesn't. ))

Law suffers some well-deserved revenge from Ceasar following the events of Punk Hazard, and it's up to Kid to help him out. Set after the current events of the manga (~chapter 717 as of this posting).

Through sheer serendipity, Tony discovers a lesser known side effect of the super soldier serum. Naturally, his scientific curiosity demands that it be tested in the bedroom. Oh, and he's always fantasized about being filled with copious amounts of come. In which Steve makes Tony's dreams come true and discovers a few things about himself along the way.

“It’s just not manly to leave your bro like this, after knowing he can’t do anything about it, you know?” Kirishima blabbers some kind of bullshit excuse, and the worst part is that it looks like he’s totally convinced of it. “It’s just a— handjob,” he stumbles over the word, the weight of what he’s proposing hitting him all at once, but he doesn’t stop. “—but if you're not into it we can pretend I didn't just say that.” Bakugou has to restrain himself from saying that he’s very much into it. Like, a lot, really. a.k.a Kirishima learns the reason behind Bakugou's grumpiest days, and he offers to help because that's what best bros do.

It happens a few more times, always with just the thinnest veneer of bro-y joking, until Xiao Zhan figures this is just a thing they do sometimes. Casual sexting among friends must just be something Yibo needs, and Xiao Zhan is selfishly glad he gets to provide it for him. He doesn't think about who else Yibo might have figured out as well as he's figured out Xiao Zhan, who else might get to do this with Yibo.

So.... what exactly did Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang get up to while Wei Ying was getting Lan Zhan drunk? In at least one reality, the answer is: Wow. Just. Really, quite a lot. or JC and NH have drunken virginal sex and discover that they are exactly each other's type. In that order. or NH discovers that JC has an unusual physiology and proceeds to lock that shit down.

Jin Guangyao lifts his head and smiles. "I'm considering a problem." "Can I be of any assistance with it?" He drops a kiss on Lan Xichen's chest. With the nail of one finger he lightly traces the characters for irony on Lan Xichen's side. "Not this one, er-ge."

Dating Xiao Xingchen came with something called the Fuck-it List. or; Song Lan arranges a gangbang for his boyfriend.

I wouldn't mind, Mingjue's voice echoes in his mind. If you wanted to be - with him, also. We share everything. au where mingcheng start banging during sunshot, and this fixes a lot of things. life gets more complicated, however, when nie mingjue notices his brother's feelings for his lover.

Everyone knows that the esteemed First Jade of Lan, the honorable Zewu-jun, future sect leader of Gusu Lan and paragon of strength, is an alpha - and a powerful one at that. While sheltering him from the Wen, Meng Yao discovers otherwise.

Lan Zhan is glaring at him. That's probably fair. The last time they'd seen each other, Wei Ying had been digging through Lan Zhan's garbage. They'd made eye contact over the shredded bags, the week's trash scattered around him like stinky, oversized Lego. Lan Zhan's eyes had been wide with horror, and Wei Ying's had been equally wide with feigned innocence. He'd reached out slowly, maintaining the eye contact, and then flipped over the food waste bin full of onion peel and carrot skin as a distraction and slunk off into the night. Probably not his finest moment. - Modern AU dragon!LWJ meets fox!WWX.

“You were watching me,” the kid says, in a soft colorless voice. It could be a threat if it wanted to be, easily, but in that tone it’s just a statement of fact. “Yeah, I’m sure it’s the first time anyone’s ever looked at you,” Baiyi says. He sips his drink. “You must not get any attention in that outfit.” The corner of the kid’s red mouth quirks up. “I’m sure you get attention in those,” he says.

Wen Kexing stumbles upon the fact that Han Ying apparently ruins every one of his orgasms - because it would be *disrespectful* otherwise. He's not about to ignore *that*, now is he.

Wei Ying might be an alpha but that doesn't mean she doesn't want to get fucked and knotted sometimes, okay? So, after buying herself a knotting dildo, she sets out to make her dreams come true. Unfortunately, the dildo gets a little... stuck... Luckily, her roommate, Lan Zhan, is home to lend a helping hand!

“I dunno, I just—” Tony wrung his hands and dropped his head as tears began to well up, overwhelmed. “I don’t—” “Oh, baby boy,” Steve said. “Why didn’tcha come ‘ta me earlier?” Tony whimpered, frustrated. Steve sighed and began to unbuckle his pants. "Don't ya worry now," he promised, rucking up Tony's dress. "I give it ta you, promise."

This is an AU about a dick piercing.

Beau was willing to bet that a lot of people's weird superstitions started out like his. Something that had been a dumb bet or stupid competition in college or Juniors, but then fuck if they didn't score that night. So it became a thing, and since enough of them have weird fucking things they'd rather not get chirped about, it just becomes normal. All that said, Beau probably could have braced himself a little better for the inevitable, which was Flower pausing in his rapid-fire and unintelligible conversation with Tanger to grin like the cat that had caught the canary and ask, in the most delighted tone possible, "Sunshine, are you wearing panties?"

The naiad moved in shortly after Sid finished his house, that first summer, a week after he filled the pool. He noticed some splashing one morning while he was eating breakfast, and when he went outside to investigate, she popped her head up out of the water, clung to the side of the pool, and hissed at him. “Uh,” Sid said, still holding a slice of toast in one hand. Dew from the grass chilled his bare feet. “Are you—hi?”

“I didn’t fuck Mitch,” Dylan hisses into Connor’s ear, squeezing Connor’s hips tightly. Connor’s right on the edge when Dylan presses his lips to Connor’s ear and whispers, viciously, “But I wanted to.”

Nate looks away, shifting his weight between his feet. “Uh, it’s a contract,” he says. EJ stares at him for a moment. “I didn’t know you were seeing someone,” he blurts out once he’s done staring because that’s the only reasonable explanation for this. Nate looks up at him, confused and weirded out at the same time. “I’m not,” he says. “It’s for you,” he adds. In which the NHL requires subs over the age of 31 to be collared, and EJ finds himself in a tough spot.

Gendry gets invited back for drinks with his boyfriend and his boyfriend's cousin and his boyfriend's cousin's boyfriend, and then things get... out of hand.

Penny is frustrated, hopeless, and fed up with being all three things. Shane is there, too.