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Kink-Bingo Round Four, Card #1
All my fan art for my very first Kink-Bingo Blackout.
Make Me Smile (Come Up and See Me)
AU. In the aftermath of October 31st, 1981, Severus Snape, Remus Lupin, and Sirius Black try to set their differences aside to keep Harry safe.
Make This Place Your Home
Sid is special, even for a wizard. Harry Potter AU.
bring it if you really want it
It starts like this: Well, okay, Patrick has no idea how it actually starts. But as pertains to him (in other words, the important part), it goes a little something like so: America, being a nation composed in large part of a melting pot of immigrants who may or may not have taken over land already owned by others using less-than-savory means, doesn’t have much of a magical national identity. Much less a magical continental identity. There’s no grand heritage going back thousands of years. Magical families home-schooled all their kids until, like, the 1800’s, and tough for the muggle-born, apparently. Hopefully you got noticed by someone who knew what to do with you before you got burned at the stake. Since you probably can’t control your powers, sport.
I Was A Teenage Werewolf
Harry Potter -- Boy-Who-Lived, Chosen One, and... well... werewolf -- has returned to Hogwarts (at Hermione’s insistence) to finish his education. On top of classes and homework, he’s living in a tent (again) and helping to run the weekly HOWL -- Hogwarts Organisation for the Welfare of Lycanthropes -- meetings. What’s more, there’s something odd about Malfoy...
The Lee Jordan Show
Welcome to the Lee Jordan show on the Wizarding Wireless Network, the best show for news, interviews, sports coverage, and entertainment on air! Tune in now!
First Drafts of the Quick-Quotes Quill
Fred and George weren't the only pair of inventors in their family. They weren't even the first to experiment in wartime.
The Visit
Draco comes to fetch Harry away from the Dursleys for seventh year.
Cartographer's Craft
In the summer after Harry's sixth year, Harry and Remus uncover a section of the Marauder's Map which has been hidden for the past twenty years, releasing a carbon copy of sixteen-year-old Sirius Black from its depths. As they prepare for the impending war, Sirius must find a place for himself in this new world, Harry must find a way to destroy Voldemort, and Remus must face his own past while trying to build a tenuous future with Tonks.
Stealing Harry
In an alternate universe where Sirius Black never went to Azkaban, Harry divides his life between the Dursleys' house and Mr. Black's bookshop -- until Sirius realises what the Dursleys are doing to him, and takes him away from their care.
Escribamens
After Lucius goes to Azkaban, Draco takes over as Lord Malfoy and learns that the family's success is based on a secret means of spying on their enemies. Knowledge is power - but when Draco learns the truth about Harry Potter, his father's strategies look a little less brilliant than he'd assumed. Text version here: http://www.hpfandom.net/eff/viewstory.php?sid=24885
Onslaught
Since Harry developed the unfortunate ability to smell magic, his life has been a series of scent-induced headaches…until the night he finds a mysterious wizard in a sun-scented Glamour.
Coffee Shop AU
Five times Stiles served mostly normal drinks in a coffee shop.
forget our future plans
The second time Derek and Stiles meet is in a gay bar. A wizarding gay bar. It's very sparkly. Series
Slayers That Were Never Called
Snippets from lives that Willow's activation spell (could have) irrevocably changed. Drabble collection.
Unexpected Connections
She'd left everything to a mysterious Longbottom great-great-uncle by the name of William with a birthdate somewhere in the ballpark of Dumbledore's.
Back Again, Harry?
Harry makes a different choice in King's Cross and is given the double-edged gift of a second chance.
The Uncle
Remus had the Dursleys whacked. Tactfully, of course, and well after Harry left the house.
Animals And Angels
Only Severus sees what's really going on here.
5 Games Jess Played In
Jess’s dad is the one who first put her on a broom, so long ago she can barely remember it. She must have loved it then, she knows, because she’s loved it every time since. There’s nothing like the feel of the wind screaming in your ears when you’re up in the air, you and your broom slicing the sky like a dart, the chill slapping color into your cheeks. Nothing like it.
The Changeling
Ginny is sorted into Slytherin. It takes her seven years to figure out why.
no place like home
When Petunia Dursley refused to take Harry in she forfeited his birthright protection, so Dumbledore took the baby to the safest place he knew: Hogwarts. The applicable staff (mostly just… not Snape) took Harry in on a rotating schedule as he grew from baby to toddler to child. They traded extra credit for babysitting among the older students, and Harry grew up knowing a few dozen different laps that were safe and warm to nap in. This was a Harry who grew up among books, among old transient walls and learned professors. They gave Binns night duty sometimes, and let him talk young Harry to sleep. This was a Harry whose world changed, on principle, daily. The stairs moved. The walls became doors. You had to keep your eyes open–you had to pay attention. So he did. He grew up in a school. Knowledge was power, but knowledge was also joy. This was his sanctuary. There was magic in his world from birth.
wavin' your banner all over the place
“Derek,” Cora growls from halfway across the Quidditch pitch, her bat paused mid-air like she’d been about to go for a swing. “What the holy hell is your weirdo Gryffindor boyfriend doing?”
00.06
"'4 and 14 adopt a newborn baby together. What do they name it, how do they raise it, etc, etc. Do they eventually get it siblings? Do they ditch it in a dumpster on prom night because its not as fun as they thought?' THIS IS QUITE LITERALLY THE WEIRDEST THING I HAVE EVER WRITTEN. And yet, I am oddly charmed by it."
It's Witchcraft
Tobirama comes down to breakfast on the first day of classes to find the Great Hall full of snickering, his husband conspicuously absent, and his brother face-down in his eggs.
the heir of something or other
Slytherins–- this is a group who laughs when Neville falls off a broom and breaks his wrist. And what if we had Harry there, who had always been the one laughed at, who had a nice thirst to prove himself, who had green trim on his robes instead of red? This Harry still stepped out in front of Malfoy’s best sneer and demanded Neville’s Rememberall back–- though he got a detention from it, not a Seekership. When kids in the Slytherin Common Room tossed jeers at the pudgy feet of Millicent Bulstrode, Harry rose up to do something about it. When Quirrell shouted “troll in the dungeons, thought you ought to know,” and Harry overheard that there was a girl in the bathroom crying, he still ran off to make sure she got out okay. Harry did not ask Millicent to come with him; this was not a boy who asked for things. When he had asked for things, Dudley had laughed, Petunia had scowled, and Vernon had said, “no,” or just kept reading the newspaper like he hadn’t heard anything at all. But when Harry went, Millicent bunched up her robes in her hands and followed.
Percy Weasley and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
In which fourteen-year-old Percy Weasley is very stressed, does not get enough sleep, and accidentally and unknowingly saves the Wizarding World because of bad aim.
The Great Muggle Tattoo Adventure
After the war, Harry needs his new flat furnished, and Luna and Neville help him out. Neville doesn't want to look on Diagon Alley because he's hoping Harry's Muggle-knowledge can help him find a tattoo parlor -- he wants a Muggle-style tattoo. So they head back to an area near where Harry grew up. While on that outing, Luna is entranced by a vintage Muggle clothing shop, which she and Harry peruse together.
It's All Relative
Professor Trelawney's prophecy about Luna really did seem crazy on the surface. But it was about to change everything she thought she ever knew about her life. (A crossover with the Percy Jackson/Heroes of Olympus series.)
a fucking space opera (or Six Characters Who Didn't Board the USS Enterprise)
"His life's a fucking space opera. And not even the erotic type that airs on New HBO. No, it's the animated comic type where the captain goes splat against the wall every episode and the pointy-eared bastard quirks his pointy eyebrow and steps on the captain's flattened remains."
I Put a Spell On You
Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs and Gryffindors, oh my. (Or, Tobirama has a date. He will probably live to regret it.) Prequel to It’s Witchcraft.
as green as a fresh pickled toad
A collection of ficlet-like rambles and other HP-centric stuff from my tumblr. Ficlet-Ramble #1: Seventh-Year will put Your Name in GOF for a Sickle You’re a first-year who can’t cast Wingardium Leviosa yet? Whatever, sure, just pay up. There’s no way you're going to be chosen against Angelina “Can Probably Crush You With Her Thighs” Johnson, but at least you can tell all your eleven-year-old buddies that you Did A Cool Thing.
the family potter
When Harry was eleven years old, his Hogwarts letter came by owl. He'd been accidentally blowing windows open and lighting cauliflower on fire for years. James took Harry to go get his wand at Ollivanders, and Lily took Dudley to the Owl Emporium where he tried to convince her they should build an aviary in the backyard. They came home with a fat black cat who hissed at everyone. Dudley named him Spooks, and Lily called him Monster. "Did you have to?" said James. "That is the meanest beast I've ever met, and I've known Remus unmedicated on full moons and a pubescent Sirius thwarted in love." Lily, who had ink on her cheek and a ballpoint pen stuck behind her ear, waved vaguely at the living room without looking up from her arrest report. Dudley was asleep in an armchair. The cat sprawled across his lap. Both its front paws were wrapped around Dudley's arm as it cleaned his wrist with aggressive fondness. "Alright," said James. "Yeah, you had to."
The Ministry of Magic vs. The Magical Meastros
concept: willy wonka and harry potter take place in the same universe the ministry of magic haaaates Willy Wonka
the dogfather
“I’m not a reverse werewolf either,” says the man. “I’m your godfather.”
no way (I won't say it)
All of this, Kakashi would like it noted, is because he has terrible friends.
Cartographer's Craft
In the summer after Harry's sixth year, Harry and Remus uncover a section of the Marauder's Map which has been hidden for the past twenty years, releasing a carbon copy of sixteen-year-old Sirius Black from its depths. As they prepare for the impending war, Sirius must find a place for himself in this new world, Harry must find a way to destroy Voldemort, and Remus must face his own past while trying to build a tenuous future with Tonks.
Nature's Revenge
Obito turns himself into the Whomping Willow. It goes great, right up until people start making a nuisance of themselves under his roots.
Harry Potter and the Problem of Potions
Once upon a time, Harry Potter hid for two hours from Dudley in a chemistry classroom, while a nice graduate student explained about the scientific method and interesting facts about acids. A pebble thrown into the water causes ripples. Contains, in no particular order: magic candymaking, Harry falling in love with a house, evil kitten Draco Malfoy, and Hermione attempting to apply logic to the wizarding world.
Legal Alien
Going to high school maybe wasn't a good idea, but at least the Air Force got him an apartment from a good neighbourhood and with interesting neighbours.
you're as sharp as a knife and you fit like a glove
Sirius Black grabs his godson and flees to Italy after Godric's Hollow. Landing in the middle of organized crime, curses, and malevolent ghosts was most definitely not part of the plan, but there might be a few perks.
IRL And All Realities
The first time he picked up Gryffindor's sword he had been young and terrified. The second time he fumbled the hilt, he had still been young and he had still been terrified. The third time? He was not much older and no more prepared for the world he had just entered, nor for the enemy he will face in order to win this twisted game of life and death.
Basic Instincts
“Who are you?” Graves demanded hoarsely. “I’m Newt. Scamander. Err. Pleased to meet you. I mean, I would’ve been pleased to meet you, under normal circumstances.” “Scamander.” Graves frowned to himself. For someone who was supposedly in a bad rut, he seemed perfectly in control. “Your accent, it’s British. Any relation to Theseus Scamander? Head of the DMLE?” “I’m his younger brother.” “Are you an Auror?” “No. I’m a magizoologist.” Graves exhaled, exasperated. “A what? Is this a rescue or are you a hostage?” “Sort of neither,” Newt admitted.
IRL And All Realities
The first time he picked up Gryffindor's sword he had been young and terrified. The second time he fumbled the hilt, he had still been young and he had still been terrified. The third time? He was not much older and no more prepared for the world he had just entered, nor for the enemy he will face in order to win this twisted game of life and death.
A Perfectly Ordinary Life
Dudley Dursley's life is exactly as he'd like it: ordinary.
Translations
Salazar Slytherin has made his decision. There's only one thing left to worry about.
Canadian Quidditch
Geno loves kids, but not the way Sid loves kids. Sid has a younger sister; Geno lived with Seryozha and Ksenia and Natalie for two years. Which is to say, he survived potty training and checkers and temper tantrums, as well as several toddler ballet recitals. Every time they work with the Little Penguins, it's like Sid is fresh off a thorough Obliviation. Geno, meanwhile, is prepared for war.
