Some things are always going to be confusing for Steve. It doesn't matter that it's been a few months since he'd woken up in the twentieth-first century, or that he is more or less used that things changed and that the world is very different from the one he'd left behind.

Derek had the bad habit of stealing Stiles' phone every time he came over. He didn't have one of his own, and Stiles had never seen a problem with him shooting off a text to someone as long as he didn't rack up minutes or download games...or porn.

Derek gives Stiles his jacket.

Modern-Day High School AU. It’s not until Hank realises half the class are glancing towards the back of the classroom with something like nerves and something like schadenfreude that he finds out Alex Summers is back.

There's no "I" in "Avenger."

"I’m trying to like you, Tony. You’re just making it very hard." Steve Rogers/Tony Stark

Tony has a point system for the times he can get Steve to be less than perfect.

Five times Beijing 2008 Olympics Gold Medalist Tony Stark thinks it's going to be no more difficult a job to get ready for London 2012, than what he has just achieved. That is, of course, before Coach Fury comes to visit, and offers him a once-in-a-lifetime chance to be a part of something much bigger than himself. Swimming AU.

Five times Beijing 2008 Olympics Gold Medalist Tony Stark thinks it's going to be no more difficult a job to get ready for London 2012, than what he has just achieved. That is, of course, before Coach Fury comes to visit, and offers him a once-in-a-lifetime chance to be a part of something much bigger than himself. Swimming AU.

OR: Five Times Everyone Else Noticed Steve and Tony Were Married and One Time They Noticed It Themselves In which Steve and Tony are married, except they're not, Natasha wishes for popcorn, Bruce has to share a lab, and everyone learns to never hide Thor's PopTarts.

“That you’re in love with each other. God, it’s like—it’s kind of ridiculous.” When he says this, Bruce snaps his gaze back up, frowning. “You two are so stubborn and blind, but the whole world knows that science boyfriends—I mean, honestly—isn’t just a pet term for you two. Even Jarvis knows, okay. You two are so stupid.”

Clint is really bad at being single. Fury hands Coulson a mission: Find Clint Barton a boyfriend.

You're still Dave Strider, and you're pretty sure a certain troll is burning up your lifetime supply of chill. Dave has convinced himself that the thing he has with Karkat is about lust and only lust -- yet when the curiosity of his his closest friends forces him to examine it in more detail, he's acutely uncomfortable with what he finds. --- Sequel to Lousy Stupid Goddamned Pretty Troll Boy.

The Game is over. You've won. But it was a long, hard, painful victory, and the rewards have a catch, and you're all a little broken. But you'll stick together anyway because that's just what you do. You help each other cope and somehow in the end you'll make it through. ((Humanstuck AU: Mainly Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas. Dave second-person POV. Post-Sburb.))

In which feelings are hard, relationships are complicated, and Seers spend a lot of time laughing at Knights.

She's silhouetted in the bright morning light; a shining angel that sets off your headache almost immediately and proclaims Hark ye, maiden of the grain and grapes, today will be a Day Moste Shittey.

Dave and John are college students with no money and one job between them. Unable to pay their bills or cover food costs, dire steps must be taken in order to rectify this. these new steps are a catalyst for a drastic shift in their relationship. this is homosexual. the author does not know how the porn industry works. shhhhhhh...

“It's a contingency plan in case of accidental teenagering,” says Stark.

Stiles learns that even with werewolves, giant lizards and psychopathic hunters on the loose, life can still find other ways to screw with you. Case in point: everyone keeps assuming he and Derek are a couple. What the hell?

Tony's life is almost perfect. He lives in a converted warehouse full of friends (and one frenemy), has a job that leaves him plenty of time to think about other things and a regular Friday night campaign. If his best friend, Steve Rogers, hadn't moved away to New York and left him behind, then perfection would've been achieved. Tony can roll with the punches though and he's almost all the way over that little bump in the road (shut up Bruce, he totally is) when Steve moves back, looking taller and broader and more confident than ever and Tony's left with a converted warehouse full of friends (and one frenemy), a job that leaves him plenty of time to think about other things, a regular Friday night campaign and the uncomfortable realization that maybe he's in love with his best friend and has been since he was sixteen.

It turns out that buddyfucking your best friend without shit getting weird requires constant vigilance.

kalpurna: is it weird that I want an original character to call Stiles a cock tease and Stiles is like WHAT and Derek is like what. drunktuesdays: lol that's so specific! why? kalpurna: BECAUSE YOU MADE A TUMBLR POST THAT USED THAT PHRASE AND EVERYTHING IS ABOUT TEEN WOLF + PEOPLE SHOULD TRY TO GET ON STILES'S DICK AND DEREK SHOULD NOT BE ABLE TO HANDLE IT???? MAYBE I JUST LIKE TO THINK ABOUT STILES TEASING COCKS???????????????? For Kalpurna, from whom I stole all the best lines.

“I called you a slave-driver!” Stiles cried hysterically. “I called you an ogre! I stole all the blue paperclips!” Derek raised an eyebrow at him. “That’s company property!” he shouted, waving his arms madly in distress. Derek ran a hand over his face. “It’s not theft if the vice president of the company gives you permission.” (Otherwise known as the Elevator AU)

"So," says Stiles, lips barely able to move against Derek's shoulder. "This is a thing, huh? I don't think we can deny that it's a thing. A conspiracy. All supernatural beings want us to be trapped in enclosed spaces."

"He misses his regular appointment to get shorn because he's too busy trying to keep Scott out of trouble and he starts to look a little bit like a hedgehog. By the time he misses the rescheduled appointment though, his hair's grown out enough that he really can't be bothered."

None of them have discussed the fact that Duncs is dating knock-off Seabses, because what can they really do about it?

Derek and Stiles go hunting. Kind of.

Danny is bruised. Their werewolf drama has officially bruised Danny. This is the worst day ever.

It takes 140 characters or less and one absolute fucking moron to change Jon's entire life forever. He should have known all along it would be Kaner. It always is.

None of them have discussed the fact that Duncs is dating knock-off Seabses, because what can they really do about it?

“We should have sober sex,” Patrick says, rolling his neck until it pops loudly. He really should be thinking about getting up off of the floor. “Why would we do that?” Jonny asks, twisting to look down at Patrick like he just suggested that they throw puppies into traffic.

Trades suck. One way to avoid them? Marrying your best friend.

Sidney's drunk when he orders a Russian bride. He doesn't expect anyone to show up - and he definitely doesn't expect that person to be an awkward-looking guy who barely speaks English.

Brent doesn't understand why his linemate and roommate is being so weird about his Olympic fling with Johnny Weir.

Taylor Hall doesn't think a destroyed slice of chocolate cake, a broken bed and his line-mates wearing his clothes necessarily means anything. The rest of the team don't agree.

Patrick writes his name on Jonny's to-send Christmas cards. It leads to feelings.

AKA the one with the phone sex. In which Kaner finds out Jonny wants to fuck him and is pretty okay with that turn of events. Phone sex, picnic baskets, crazy eyes, hockey and insanity ensue.

Ryan supposes that’s fair, if he was dating someone, he wouldn’t have put so much thought into choreographing a threesome either.

Normally, Laura is perfectly willing to delicately coach her baby brother through the endless labyrinth of his emotional manpain, but Laura’s dissertation is due in two days and she just flat out doesn’t have the time.

For the longest time this fic was unofficially titled 'Kaner's not a hooker but Tazer probably wants him to be', and I really can't think of a better way to summarise it than that. Many words of Tazer fantasising, pining, jerking off, and paying for sex, because that's apparently how he rolls.

And of course, because Sharpy is the most ill-mannered Canadian ever, he opens up the newspaper like he doesn't have the most entertaining thing in Chicago across the table from him anyway. He's totally pretending to read it, just to make Patrick salty, but two can play at that game, so he snatches the Sunday inserts out of the folds, smirking at Sharpy. But he glances down and staring up at him, looking like, all of eighteen and strangely soft and sweet is Jonathan fucking Toews.

They've been hooking up for more than a year, undefined and mostly unspoken, when Johnny first speaks French in bed with Kaner.

In which Patrick Kane gets a little hysterically obsessed with Jonathan Toews' sexual prowess.

Kaner tries to fuck his way out of love. That goes as well as you might imagine. That's my summary. But liketheroad's summary is also applicable: In which THERE IS A BACHELOR AUCTION TO SAVE ALL THE PUPPIES OF CHICAGO AND TAZER IS THE ONE WHO HAS TO SAVE THOSE PUPPIES AND KANER TRIES TO FUCK HIS WAY OUT OF LOVE BUT OH TOO BAD FOR YOU KANER, YOU HAVE TOO MANY FEELINGS FOR THAT.

sometimes you have to go down before you can go out.

Patrick knows the Blackhawks have been not-so-subtly shopping around for someone who could bond with number-three-draft-pick Jonathan Toews, but it’s still a little weird for him to be sitting down with a couple of their suits in a conference room he didn’t even know existed.

It's the first time Gou has seen Samezuka's captain in a swimsuit. It's the first time Seijuurou's seen her in a swimsuit. It's clear both of them are ill-equipped to handle this situation. Shameless fluff, blushing, and muscle-appreciation. Written for a kink meme prompt: "So Seijuurou is the captain of the Samezuka team. Gou is the manager of the Iwatobi one. Both teams compete together. Cue the two of them seeing each other at a meet, both only wearing swimwear, and nearly going into cardiac arrest over each other."

What it says on the tin. Canon-AU for Season 3 (obvs the finale hasn't aired yet so no real confirmation that it's canon-compliant)

Stiles would say his relationship with Derek is about fifteen percent empty threats, thirty percent sass, ten percent avoiding violence together, and five percent eyebrows. If anyone asked, he would say the remaining forty percent is mutual orgasms. It’s a good thing no one ever asks.

Kink meme prompt: Rin has a nightly visitor in his dorm room. They don't notice that Nitori is very much awake on the top bunk of the bed and listening to everything that's going on below him. 'Perhaps he should set up a throwaway email address and anonymously send Rin a link to the Amazon page for the Kama Sutra. Or Sex For Dummies. Or maybe one of those children’s toys with the colorful shaped pegs that fit into matching holes.' Basically, Rin is pretty much the worst roommate ever.