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Guy Bffs Try Gross Lubes Off of One Another
AU where Buzzfeed still won’t give us the Unsolved merch we deserve, but this they at least do provide.
keep you like an oath
"I'm in love with you," Ryan says, desperate. "No, you're in love with the views."
YELLOW SQUARE
“Since being the scene of those two, grisly double homicides in the early 1950’s, the Bringle House Bed and Breakfast has sat empty, waiting for the next couple stupid enough to try to stay all four nights.” “That’s us then? The couple stupid enough?” “Apparently,” Ryan said to the camera. TJ, one hand on the side of the lens, smirked, and Ryan quickly continued with, “now, we may not have any actual couples on Unsolved, but we figured the ghosts won’t be able to tell the difference if there are two people sleeping here.” “Yeah, if ghosts want to kill someone, they’re probably not looking at the fine print to decide what kind of couple their victims are,” Shane said. “Because we are, obviously, a couple.” “Wh—” “A couple of ghosthunters.” He winked dramatically at the left-most camera, and Ryan shook his head. “You realize you just admitted to being a ghosthunter, right?” (Or; Ryan and Shane spend four nights in one haunted house—four nights twisting closer to either each other, or insanity)
ghosts can't pick up power drills (probably)
“What you’re suggesting is that we have sex in the exact spot where a dude was once brutally murdered with a power drill. That is what you’re suggesting to me right now.” Shane throws up his hands. “Well, sure, when you say it like that, it sounds ridiculous.”
