Qui-Gon takes Obi-Wan to an exotic festival for his 18th birthday. His plans for a surprise backfire in a pleasant way. Set several years before TPM.

"You're not a very good Jedi, are you?" the Sith Lord said. "Oh, excuse me, I am an excellent Jedi," Rodney said.

Obi-Wan is exhausted, drunk, and just about out of fucks to give.

“Sorry,” Poe pants, shivering as Finn’s hands still on his skin, palms warm and callous-rough. “Sorry, I get kind of loud when, uh—“ “You have sex?” Finn grins at him, lower lip between his teeth. It makes Poe want to whine. “I like it.”

“You mean to tell me you’ve never touched yourself.” Rey knows that there’s a great deal she doesn’t understand about the universe, but sometimes, compared to Finn, she feels utterly worldly. This is one of those times.

“You okay with this?” Han might have been asking him, or Leia. Probably both. Leia looked between them, a little smile tugging at one corner of her mouth. “I’m willing to share.” “Luke?” There was probably some common sense argument to be made against sleeping with both of them--but hell, he’d been blowing past the common sense arguments against sleeping with Leia for months now. He slowly nodded. “Y--” he cleared his throat. “Yeah.”

The ancient people of the Zeffo contact the Jedi in a cry for help,they need force users who can connect to the living force,who can save something dear to them. But the price of life is itself something dear,and one Obi-Wan is not sure they can pay.

The sight of Obi-Wan sprawled out in the warm, shallow pool, eyes closed as he drowses, is too much for any sentient to resist, and Kit certainly isn't about to try.

Getting flung five years into the past is pretty much a miracle. Crash-landing on the weirdest Jedi Master he's ever had the misfortune to meet is a lot more like one extended headache for Rex, especially when he also has to contend with a brand new Force sensitivity, old friends, a Force spirit wearing a familiar face, Sith Lords, ruthless cloners, and the looming shadow of a coming war. Maybe it really would have been easier to make like Obi-Wan and find a nice, sandy planet to bury himself on.

“One more,” Alpha decides, and beneath him Jon can't do anything but moan, hitching and ragged.

Boba attempts to set his father up with someone interesting. It would probably go a lot smoother if that someone wasn't a Jedi. And if there weren't monsters all around the town that were about to make themselves a problem.

When he rejoins the Order in the middle of the Clone Wars, all Ferus wants is to help as many people as possible. An emergency mission lands him in control of the 501st before he even has time to catch his balance, though, and the disappearance of the Chancellor means there's no time to waste. The galaxy's Deep Core is a treacherous maze of deadly planets and old traps, and fighting their way through is the sort of thing that would push Ferus to his limits, even without a squad of clones to protect at the same time.

Only a few years after being Knighted, one of Feemor's missions takes a turn for the worse. He's saved from certain death by a Mandalorian in black and red armor, a Mandalorian who just happens to be looking for the same long-lost artefact that Feemor is after. With Feemor injured, they have to work together to find it, but that's just the start of the trouble.

In an attempt to find an ancient weapon that will let them fight a Sith Lord on equal ground, Jon seeks out a lost Jedi Temple on a war-torn world. Saving two clone troopers isn't anywhere in the plan, and letting them tag along with him seems like inviting trouble, but Jon does it anyway. It's possible that Knol has a point about his instincts getting him killed one of these days.

Quinlan finds a man frozen in carbonite on Geonosis. That's just the start of his problems.

Jon Antilles has spent most of the war keeping his head down and staying out of the fighting. But when he and Fay find evidence of a new bioweapon going to production on a Separatist planet, they move to destroy it rather than let it be deployed against the clone armies. Dooku's presence is an unexpected complication, and rather than break cover, Jon lets himself be captured and thrown in the Count's personal dungeon. He's not the only one there, however. Rex and his men have also been captured, and they're not about to trust a stranger in their midst. Jon has to pick between keeping out of the war the way he has been or rescuing the clones, blowing his cover and losing the freedom he's fought so hard for.

The press of a body sliding into the bed behind him wakes Mace from a light sleep, too alert for any real sort of surprise, and he huffs as thick arms wrap around him, shift him. “So you took my invitation after all,” he says, and there's a sound behind him, rough and amused.

Feral gets kidnapped by a Jedi Master. It's the best thing that's ever happened to him. Aka how Plo Koon’s foray into Sith-napping saved the galaxy, featuring galactic road-trips, daring expeditions into Sith strongholds, plenty of soul-searching, pirates, the Death Watch, senators with big blasters, more pirates, and three brothers who weren’t prepared for any of it.

A week after an attack that nearly killed him and his son, Jaster Mereel finds Mostross dead on a battlefield. His killer is a Jedi, grievously wounded, who Jaster takes into his care. By Mandalorian tradition, Jon Antilles owes him a life-debt, and Jaster is cunning enough not to let such a thing slip away. It's meant to be an entirely political arrangement. It doesn't stay that way for long.

Mace's morning starts with far too much paperwork. Being kidnapped at blaster-point is honestly an improvement.

His head hurts, and Xanatos would very much like to find whoever chained him up facedown on a filthy stone floor and remove their spleen with a rusty spoon. (Or: Xanatos is not a Jedi, not a pawn, not in the right universe, and most of all he is not amused by any of this.)

The Republic hasn't had a standing army in over two thousand years. Even before the Reformation, there was no war on a grand enough scale to justify the expense. It feels like a bad joke, when the Chancellor decrees it, when the Senate allows it. The Jedi aren't a military. The Jedi have never been a military. They give Obi-Wan a battalion. They give him a battlecruiser, a Marshall Commander, they knight his Padawan. He looks over all the clerical minutiae a military runs on and wishes they'd given him a secretary. cody, obi-wan, and ghost company at the beginning of the war, learning to work together, trust each other, maybe even like each other

Obi-Wan went over thirty years without a heat. It was hardly unusual or unexpected. Everyone knew omega reproductive systems were finicky. Omegas were incredibly fertile while in heat. Nature had, perhaps, compensated for the situation by ensuring they only went into heat when...conditions were correct. OR, the Dark Side AU where the Empire is already in power, the Jedi are long gone, and Obi-Wan Kenobi ends up leading an army to wipe out the Emperor's enemies. Things get more complicated when he goes into heat.

Of all the potential downsides to anchoring his mind to his clone commander’s, Tae hadn’t ever considered this one.

“Who’s in the next room?” Obi-Wan asks, low and soft right next to Hardcase’s ear.

When Jon Antilles takes command of the 501st Legion, he brings a whole host of secrets along with him. They're not his secrets alone, however, and when Jesse starts to dig, in the name of getting to know their new general, he very quickly finds himself tangled up in matters that could reshape the entire galaxy.

“No,” Padmé says, breathless but full of iron. “Hands on the floor.”

When Jon goes undercover to rescue a stolen padawan in the sprawling Mandalorian Empire, he expects danger and potential death. He doesn't expect to be captured by the Mand'alor himself during a raid. It's been thousands of years since the Jedi Order operated openly, and Jon isn't about to be the one to reveal their existence, but between Katooni needing to learn control, Jaster Mereel being nothing like what Jon expects, and threats within the Mandalorian court itself, the danger of exposure just keeps growing.

If someone was intending to assemble a team of heroes to help save the day, they rather missed the mark, in Granta's opinion.

When Dark Woman orders him to fall in the name of finding the Sith Lord and ending the war, Jon obeys the way he always does. If it's in the name of saving more lives, he can believe it's worth it, no matter what he has to do. Rex and Cody getting dragged down with him was never something he intended.

Fox has a second chance, a to-do list, a stolen lightsaber, and a complete willingness to give everyone around him grey hairs. And a Jedi Master to seduce. It's going to be a ride.

The Republic falls in the span of a day. Xanatos, desperate to keep his son out of the line of fire, makes a reckless deal with the new emperor, whose face he's never seen. But there are dark secrets behind the emperor's fury and prophecies that won't let themselves be thwarted, and Xanatos is nothing but a pawn in a far greater game.

A lifetime of hunting demons never prepared Jon for suddenly finding himself the fake ex-boyfriend of a man with incredibly conniving adult children. Jaster, for his part, got in over his head about the time he lied to Arla and Jango about where his hickey came from. The demon hunters are just a little extra depth, at this point.

When Fox and his men capture a Jedi, the first caught in the Empire in decades, it's the final piece Fox needs to set his plans into motion. Assassinating the Emperor isn't going to be an easy task, though, and to get the training he needs to manage it, he'll have to keep Jon close and avoid the Emperor's suspicion, because anything else is a certain death sentence. The solution, of course, is only the start of even more problems.

They were made for the Jedi. That’s the party line, anyway, and Rex says, “Yes, sir” because he was trained by the best, but he doesn’t believe it. And then Knight Kenobi becomes part of the 501st. He wears beskar’gam and headbutts droids and one time he confesses that the last time he fought in a war, he had to leave the Order to do it. Rex still doesn’t believe that he and his brothers were made for the Jedi, but he thinks maybe, this Jedi was made for them. Or, the one where Torrent is Like That, and Cody blames them for all his premature gray hairs.

“How you feeling, sir?” he asked, eyeing his General. They’d, at least, managed to all evac back to the shuttles without losing anyone, leaving the noxious-smelling laboratory where they’d found a pack of Seppy scientists working on new biological weapons behind. “I’ll be fine, Commander,” Obi-Wan said, without opening his eyes, his voice thick and hoarse. “But comm ahead, would you, and make sure the medics are ready for me.” OR, the one were Obi-Wan gets dosed with an especially nasty toxin, and Cody helps him survive the following hours.

One inch sideways on Alpha’s bunk and Quinlan slams face-first into the memory of Obi-Wan in the same position he’s in right now.

“’M supposed to be on duty,” Fox manages, and that argument probably would have worked better an hour ago, when he was being frog-marched out of his office as Thorn waved a solemn and mocking goodbye. It definitely doesn’t carry a lot of weight when he’s pinned between Thire and the tiles, real water running down his back and endlessly hot.

Boba Fett likes to be in control. Din Djarin feels more out of control with every passing day. Giving control over to Boba would make both of them happy. Din just doesn't understand why that has to be so complicated. (Or, rebuilding an entire culture is hard. Boba helps, more or less.)

“I can feel how much you want to come,” Obi-Wan murmured soothingly. “Would you like that? To come right now so that you can sit here properly as long as I’d like?” Or, Obi-Wan and Anakin relax, and Obi-Wan helps Anakin be good for him.

Anakin has a habit of getting laid with clones, but somehow manages to keep it discreet enough for everyone's safety. That is, until Rex walks in on him riding Fives.

“You have a choice,” Cody begins. “I don’t want any of you to think that you don’t. If you want no part of this, all you have to do is say so. But if I know any of you half as well as I think I do, this choice won’t be particularly hard to make.” He takes a deep breath and counts his heartbeats against the reverent silence of the mess hall. “We may belong to the Republic, but we were made for the Jetti.” And thus, the 212th Attack Battalion abducts their General. (It's for his own health, really.)

Two months after the Guard officially moves to Coruscant, the lawyer shows up. _ In which Obi-Wan Kenobi never returns to the Jedi order after the war on Melidaa/Dann and instead finds another way to follow the Force's will. Namely, by fighting sentient-rights abuses all over the galaxy and emancipating the Grand Army of the Republic, one clone trooper at a time.