CRAAAAAACK! Potential Valdemar AUs

Steve Rogers is a capable leader, a kind and cheerful man, a good friend, a strong role model, and a loyal soldier. He's also teetering on the edge of suicide.

John wakes up in someone else’s body.

Bruce Wayne can't possibly be as dumb as he acts, and Clark Kent isn't as ordinary as he appears.

"The first time Steve meets Toni is about a week after he wakes up."

Eliot goes temporarily missing on a job in a greenhouse and Hardison goes to find him.

Eliot found a way to make his style work at Dalton Academy. It just worked a little too well.

After the fighting is over, then come the hot baths, ice packs, resurrection from the dead, political maneuvering, and happy endings (not like that, Tony).

Steve thinks about sex a lot, and he'd like to have some, if he could just stop being an idiot around the people he'd like to have it with.

How to build a database to get the right person or people for every kinky contingency. One such task is suggested; readers are encouraged to submit more.

Teen Wolf/SGA team-fic, with Lydia being awesome. “This is a terrible idea,” Stiles tells the room again. “You’ll all be sorry when Derek pushes me off a cliff.”

In which xeno/inflation/mpreg/egg-laying is taken entirely too seriously, compulsive world building is showcased, and I pretend really hard that Gamzee might ever be a sympathetic character again. Originally found at: http://homesmut.dreamwidth.org/8447.html?thread=39867903

"We should check on Prospit," Jane says, one week into your probably pointless run through the gas-and-zombies weirdness that Sburb turned out to be.

John and Karkat find themselves on opposite ends of the universe after the game.

"Okay. Let's work on shelter first. You ever build a treehouse?" Sh-t, Tavros's little impressed face kind of gets you right in the pump biscuit.

"Cordelia's been in the game long enough that she can spot a secret identity from a mile away."

There are moments in Jim's life that act as axis points.

Twisted Gifted: Some gifts really need to be returned. Truths, Lies and the Tipping Point: The news report seems more interested in the argument between the team during the fight than the way they eventually won. And then it gets worse. Minions First: Technically, and she will use this contextually with the phrase "meet cute" in the future, the first time Darcy Lewis ever talked to Clint Barton was in a storage closet.

prompt 069. House/Wilson -- first time with a dildo.

Yeah, Billy's a superhero, and that's awesome. But he's still a teenager, and that means answering to his folks.

All Our Exploring: "We shall not cease from exploration And the end of all our exploring Will be to arrive where we started And know the place for the first time." - T.S. Eliot, Little Gidding. sometimes i feel: "I think I've missed a crucial turn in this conversation," Stiles says, practically into Scott's mouth because holy shit they are so so close now what is this, is this real. in a shower of: jonny washes patrick's hair; patrick doesn't hate it. Keep an Open Mind: They’ve had this connection for nearly as long as they’ve known each other; Patrick doesn’t know why it happened, what made it so that out of all the people in the world, it’s Johnny and only Johnny whose thoughts he can read, but there it is. One day it was just Patrick in his head, and the next, he’d woken up with the background awareness of Johnny in there too, and a panicked, thumping voice saying, Oh, shit. You too? Strange Days: "I don't want to talk to Deaton. I don't want to be another supernatural problem to be dealt with." No Business Like Show Business: In which Merlin is promoted from production intern to talent, is easily mortified, and has Post-It arguments with Arthur while the art department watches in glee. Also, there are gay dragons. Gone to the Dogs: Jonathan Toews turns into a puppy. Then some other stuff happens. what i'm saying is i need you here: Pat’s been carrying around these feelings for Johnny like an extra limb for years, now. It sucks, a little bit, but mostly it’s not too bad. Sometimes it blindsides her, though, like when the lockout ends and she comes back home. The Law of Conservation of Pants: Or, Five Things Darcy Lewis Thought She Knew Before She Met the Avengers (And One Thing That Will Always Be True). In which Darcy is put in charge of Social Media relations for the Avengers and finds that 5/6th of them challenge the things she thought she believed.

In breaking news, surprising no one, Sharpy is a dick.

Avatar Toph does not like the North Pole. AU.

Fighters and Sacrifices.

Mako still gives you tentacles. And how.

Riku didn't actually create this monster; Zack was just born like that.

He's not the Sephiroth Zack knew...and Zack is totally on-board with that.

People come to Waypoint for a reason.

"My name is Karkat Vantas," you say when the recording starts. "Imperial ID number 4136-1211-15201. I'm applying for status as a pail slave. I'm," you swallow hard to try to clear the lump from your throat, "I'm unfit for standard contribution due to abnormal hemotype, but I want to serve my Empire to the best of my ability. I understand the physical demands of the position and," your voice cracks, "I'm training to be better prepared for them. I swear to cooperate readily and faithfully with my assigned user. I surrender my body to Imperial custody. All hail Her Imperious Condescension, and all hail her glorious Empire."

Zack has the best worst ideas.

Their luck is running just about average.

One is a majorly kinky adult man in his prime, who got to go to nightclubs and met people and had one night stands and learned through trial and error, and is now fairly relaxed about his needs. The other is a teenager who thanks to the internet and his own reasoning has a lot of intellectual understanding and nothing else and zero real social experience, and the same needs and instincts and no outlet for them.

You wake up to the sound of rain thundering hard and heavy against the roof of your apartment building.

The Seven-Headed Serpent is sent on loan to Hydra. It goes about as well as you'd expect.

It's like this. I was warning folks that I hadn't yet watched the last handful of eppies for FMA, and that if anyone spoiled me, they'd have to die loud and painful. So of course people decided to "spoil" me. Like how, in ep 51, Roy gets his WINGS and Ed is stabbed with SCARY GREEN ICE STUFF, and Seifer CRIES. Yes. Yes, it's FF8. DIE, PEOPLE. *hearts*

So, I wrote some Tyler Seguin/Jamie Benn porn based on this amazing post by [personal profile] sinsense about the universe she and others had created where promising rookies in the NHL were assigned an older player to ~kneel~ for as a training measure. GO READ THAT POST it is amazing if you're into that sort of thing.

Semi-related to my feelings about the combine: I snicker every time sports writers talk about a team "topping" or "edging" or "knotting" another team (because I am twelve), but it's those stories about how you can "ruin" a young player that make me think dirty things. Like, obviously letting your whole team gangbang your rookie will ruin him. So you have to pair each rookie up with an older, more experienced player as a mentor (Kaner with Sharpy, AGally with Prust, etc). Because, especially for the highly ranked rookies, it’s a lot of pressure, they can get wound too tight, so they need to be put on their knees regularly by someone they trust. The Bruins didn’t do that for Segs, they let anyone fuck him, and look what happened. The Stars put him with Jamie over the summer and it settles him right down.