Written for [info]dangomango for [info]help_pakistan. She requested something set in the same 'verse as Easy Access (which was written in response to a [info]blindfold_spn prompt a couple of rounds ago), with Dean getting off on watching Sam with a FC, but treating Sam as a girl rather than a guy. She most particularly requested Sam/FC scissoring and possessive!Dean with a side of reluctant!Sam. She had a lot of ideas, and I tried to do a good deal of them, but still keep it all true to the real spirit of Easy Access, which is basically impreg kink. This is really a little different than Easy Access -- so rather than a sequel, it is kind of a crazy mutated AU/"could-happen" cousin.

How to build a database to get the right person or people for every kinky contingency. One such task is suggested; readers are encouraged to submit more.

Ronon watches over Bruce and Logan because Sheppard asks him to do so. Bruce and Tony like having Ronon around. Smut ensues, lots of slashy smut.

eridan is so tolerable when he can't talk

Homo sapiens domesticus Humans (Homo sapiens domesticus) are short-lived primates of the family Hominidae, and the only existant species of the genus Homo. They originated in Africa, and spread to other continents of planet Earth within a megavorn. While fractious and warlike in their wild state, they are easily trained to a useful function.

Derek works at a porn store. One day, Stiles comes in asking all sorts of TMI questions about different toys. That's where it all starts.

kchanlp: NaruSasu + Itachi. Maybe hipster? In which big brother has to teach Sasuke how he should first and foremost close the goddamn door when his goddamn boyfriend is in his room doing goddamn... things.

"Oh god," Pepper says. "Are you kidding me?"

Eridan's right. This guy is so bangable, and you're going to be the one to do it. ...just as soon as you can manage to make that whole 'words' thing work again.

Ryan and Shane have been together for months now, but somehow a little detail about Shane escaped Ryan. And so they decide to make up for it.

Their first date is objectively pretty great. But later, when Bucky comes after Steve slides inside him and slaps him on the ass, Steve knows this is going to be fun.

It’s just…does Viktor not get bored with doing it the same way every night? Doesn’t he want to spice things up? Is Yuuri being unreasonable? He’s pretty sure that if Viktor told him his performance in bed was unsatisfying his soul would flee his body for a more merciful plane of existence, but…Viktor is thicker-skinned than he is. And so here they are. Viktor’s bed is wide and soft, and Yuuri is lying there with wet hair and ratty boxers while Viktor absently trails kisses over his shoulder. It’s nice. It’s soft. It’s good. Viktor’s headboard is enormous and Yuuri keeps thinking about Viktor’s wrists bound to it, black rope over white skin. Fuck. He should say something.

When looking into the code Pidge hacked in Shiro's arm, Matt finds something. Shiro sees an opportunity.

His arm wasn't the only thing the Galra changed. They also gave him certain... needs. Shiro learns to make it work for him.

Eddie briefly recalls some tentacle porn he’d watched just before Venom became a part of him. The copious vines holding her up and entering her every opening simultaneously. Fluids, from her or the monster who could tell, leaking from her mouth and pussy and ass. Oh, Eddie. Venom’s thought shook him, definitely not wanting to take their tongue out his mouth, How’d you keep this from us? Eddie had to be completely honest… he had absolutely no idea how he did either. ~ That good good tentacle fuckin' that Eddie so desperately wanted.

Short fics originally posted to my Tumblr, edited and collected here.

Through sheer serendipity, Tony discovers a lesser known side effect of the super soldier serum. Naturally, his scientific curiosity demands that it be tested in the bedroom. Oh, and he's always fantasized about being filled with copious amounts of come. In which Steve makes Tony's dreams come true and discovers a few things about himself along the way.

No one would help him get to the bottom of Kerberos, and it had all reached a breaking point when Iverson threatened to terminate Keith’s scholarship if he kept snooping. So Keith got what he came for, the little black book no one was ever meant to find, and stopped snooping. Because now, he’ll have someone else to do all the snooping for him. The situation isn’t ideal, Keith thinks as he slits his palm open and methodically draws the pentagram on the floor, placing the necessary items one by one into each point of the star. But considering the circumstances, he thinks he’s done alright for himself. More importantly, for Shiro.

Irrationally, he feels like he’s been caught. But Jiang Yanli knows. She’s known for a while; she knew even before he himself knew. But they’ve never - they’ve never actually talked about it, let alone… this. Whatever this is. Is he a bad husband? He feels like he should be, but Jiang Yanli isn't upset at him for it. If anything she's - she keeps pushing him toward Wen Ning, making excuses for Wen Ning to spend more time with them, and more bewilderingly, with him. He doesn’t get it, but he’s grateful - grateful that she loves him and trusts him like this, that she’s so unbothered by his... His odd, misplaced attraction to their flatmate. -- A companion piece/alternate POV for the first scene in Soft touch, soft heart by Verse.

Xiao Xingchen’s hip jerked toward the wand, but against the wide fix of the spreader bar between his knees, he had little leverage. Song Lan just moved the wand with him.

Daylen Amell really wishes Alistair was easier to hate. Then maybe he could stop thinking about what he'd look like on his knees.

Some time ago, Nie Mingjue gave this gift to Huaisang. Now Huaisang has found a way for both of them to enjoy it in a new way and he can't wait to share. From the text: “I just want to try something, if you don't mind.” Nie Mingjue watches him retrieve a box from under the bed. He recognizes it, it contains something Nie Mingjue gifted to Nie Huaisang. And indeed, that's exactly what his brother extracts from the box. A sizable pale green jade dildo, shaped after his own member. He gave that to Nie Huaisang before their relationship evolved into this. He didn't explain at the time, what it was supposed to look like, but it became very clear the first time Nie Huaisang saw him erect. By then he had familiarized himself with that shape and that size, and was delighted by this discovery.

Mingjue has been working too much, so Huaisang brings him lunch and a special surprise. Huaisang's motives aren't entirely altruistic...

“You were watching me,” the kid says, in a soft colorless voice. It could be a threat if it wanted to be, easily, but in that tone it’s just a statement of fact. “Yeah, I’m sure it’s the first time anyone’s ever looked at you,” Baiyi says. He sips his drink. “You must not get any attention in that outfit.” The corner of the kid’s red mouth quirks up. “I’m sure you get attention in those,” he says.

Ye Baiyi must really, really want to fuck him, Xie thinks. Maybe when he’s asleep Xie can drop poison in his ear. Or steal any treasures he carries. How has he lived this long if he’s actually this stupid?

Shang Qinghua had never had a good idea - not a single good idea, not ever. In fact, this was possibly his worst idea ever. In fact, he was pretty sure he was going to die. In fact, he was - ... wait, why wasn't Binghe upset? Why was Binghe willing to do this? What sort of novel had this become!? Why was the only dying he was doing now while Mobei-jun and Luo Binghe were clearly having a good time without him?!

Eddie yanked at the tentacles stringing him up, his mind and body alight with need, "Venom, please please please do that again, fuck –" I think you might need a little help remembering the terms of our agreement, Venom mused instead.

After the tranquil bamboo house on Qing Jing Peak and Luo Binghe’s splendid, demonic mansion, Shen Qingqiu definitely finds sleeping on a futon cradling a cheap dakimakura to be a downgrade.

Xue Yang's pretty sure that he could be a better girlfriend to Song Lan than whoever the fuck he's actually dating. Like, pretty sure. Almost certain. (xue yang and song lan go to the same gym, and xue yang has never been good at resisting temptation)

Having a crush on your roommate is really embarrassing, except that's apparently the opposite of a problem. Jiang Cheng can't deny that's pretty convenient. Wei Ying holds it up, a series of straps and buckles and velcro and wow, really a lot of leather. It has absolutely no conceivable form beyond tangled. Nie Huaisang opens the door at exactly the moment that Wei Ying holds the thing up to Jiang Cheng’s chest, as if he’s trying to imagine how exactly it would fit onto a person, and it falls into a tangled pile between them while they stare at Huaisang in mild mortification.

Wei Ying might be an alpha but that doesn't mean she doesn't want to get fucked and knotted sometimes, okay? So, after buying herself a knotting dildo, she sets out to make her dreams come true. Unfortunately, the dildo gets a little... stuck... Luckily, her roommate, Lan Zhan, is home to lend a helping hand!

The package arrives the day after Sid gets back to Pittsburgh. Sid recognizes the discreet wrapping, and the lack of a return address is so obvious they might as well have printed Sex Toys R Us all over the damn box.

That's the end of the talking for a while, but it's only the beginning of Patrick thinking about it. He does some research, but it turns out that googling "what does it mean that I like getting held down during sex" doesn't provide much helpful information, and he can't bring it up with anyone, so he just – thinks about it, instead. It's probably more thought than he's put into anything before in his life other than hockey, but it leads him to some pretty interesting conclusions.

The Washington Capitals part of the D/s AU.

Sokka is bored and horny; Zuko is stuck at his new job. Everything goes exactly the way you'd expect. "I really don't think my new boss will respond well to 'Can I push back my start date by a week, because my boyfriend took the week off work without telling me, and now he's moping because he can't act on all of his week-long sex marathon plans?'"

It’s quiet above the spray of water, hushed and constant. Steam saturates the room like an otherworldly mist, beading on the dark blue tiles and rolling over the lights in glowing, shifting clouds. It's a little hard to breathe, but that’s why he’s here. To watch, and listen. If there was ever a question as to how they came to be here, Shouta would say it was because Yagi was mildly obsessed with his dick.

Zoro would thank Luffy for introducing him to Law all those months back, if he ever dared to tell him why in the first place that is, but their mutual friend didn't have to know what kind of relationship they had developed. Only him and Law would ever know what happened behind that door everytime Zoro would visit. (or Law and Zoro having a rough session in the BDSM room)