Welcome to: If Male Superhero Costumes were Designed Like Female Superhero Costumes!

When Johnny comes back from the Negative Zone, he needs all the support he can get. He wants it from his lover and his ex-wife. Peter and Lyja want what's best for him.

The blur has resolved itself into a man, mostly covered in red and blue, who turns his masked head and snarks cheerfully at Tony.

Flash first sees them when Parker is at his locker one morning. Just peeking out of the cuff of one of the sleeves of his sweatshirt. Bruises, mottled and bluish-black, like Parker's been in a fight.

For the prompt: "Troy takes control of the Dreamatorium one day and enacts a fantasy that he wants."

It was MJ who said that she runs a nightclub that Gwen’s never been to.

Gwen Stacy falls, and survives at the cost of another life. The world mourns Spider Man and Gwen mourns Peter Parker, whose existence seems to have faded into the background. But the world needed Spider Man, and few people needed Peter. In order to do what was needed, to be who the world needed, she must first become hope in his stead. The night after his funeral, she gets to work on her own suit.

"Do I look like that much of a damsel in distress to you?"

In a world where the first words your soulmate will say to you appear on your left wrist at your tenth birthday, Peter gets the short end of the stick.

Peter was having the worst day the author could've come up with - and that's even before he accidently killed Deadpool.

Spider-Man comes out of the closet. Peter Parker would give anything to crawl back in.

Peter’s known Wade for a while now, so he can maybe see how this makes sense -- like, maybe Wade has a thing about going commando and just happened to have an old girlfriend’s panties lying around, one thing led to another…but… “And the bra?” Peter croaks.

"Why don’t you ever let me see it? If you have the name already, why can’t you tell me whose it is? I thought we were best friends." Everyone gets their Name when they turn twenty-one. It isn’t their own name either. It’s the name of their Soulmate. When Wade Wilson wakes on his twenty-first birthday, he looks down at his chest and sees Peter Benjamin Parker. He stares for a moment then shrugs, gets dressed, and doesn’t think about it for another six weeks.

"The first time Peter’s timer stops he is eleven years old. It times out in the middle of the night and wakes him up like an electric shock. The blank timer stares at him from his wrist as he yells and screams for his aunt and uncle." Spideypool AU with timers where Wade keeps getting killed and making Peter's timer go blank. By the time they meet he's pretty pissed off. This was certainly a summary with words, but they were not good ones. Based off a tumblr prompt that I cannot find anymore.

Peter first meets Deadpool when he's nine years old, shaking in a basement somewhere and waiting to die.

In a world where Omegas far outnumber Alphas, a dowry system is in place. The Omega’s family offers a dowry in order to secure a respectable Alpha match, with the highest dowries netting the “best” Alphas. Aunt May struggles to secure an Alpha for her Omega nephew’s first heat. All her meager savings can afford is a butt-ugly (by his own admission) Alpha without much experience to speak of. Peter would rather go unmated than lose his virginity to a guy that can’t go five seconds without making a Monty Python reference. However, it seems Peter has no choice…

What is it about Spidey that gets me so worked up? The sassy banter? The lithe physique? The skin-tight spandex? The bondage? [Bingo.] {It’s totally the bondage.}

In another time and place, Wade would have gone back to Weasel’s bar and met the love of his life, Vanessa. However, in this life, predicated by a squeaky skateboard wheel, he met Peter instead. Between robot invasions, mad scientists, and civil disagreements, they have their work cut out for them. Many Princess Peach references are made.

Peter and Wade try out one of Wade's kinks.

Something strange happened to Wade. Well, something strange always happens to Wade. But this type of strange involves an alien ray, Wanda (aka Lady Deadpool), and some slight errors with his regeneration in another universe. Luckily, the Merc with the Mouth has an Ultimate Amazing boyfriend and a newly adopted sister/doppelganger to help him through. Or Deadpool is atomized, and comes back home with lady parts.

They were in another timeline. It happened occasionally. Who even knew how Wade got involved. He was just trying to show Darcy how many tacos he could fit in his mouth (six), and then blammo: Big flash of light, whirling space vortex, the indescribable sensation of the universe contracting with you inside it to the size of a single electron, and then everybody was spat out in a heap on the sidewalk of a place that looked like -- but probably wasn’t -- New York, and all of Wade’s tacos de sesos were lost to the interdimensional void. “Nooo,” Wade whispered, heartbroken. “Tacos.”

Wade naked was a sight to behold; something akin to the traumatised beauty of broken glass, a burnt out forest, a dilapidated building. Or so Peter thought as Wade stripped away his costume and headed to the bathroom.

"Kid," says Tony Stark wearily, "Please gimme a reason Loki's been spotted talking to Spiderman that isn't 'I wanted to be his friend'. Please. Tell me you can do that." Peter hums. "I could?" "And that reason would be the truth?" Peter shrugs into his sweater. "If you wanted it to be the truth it could be." "That right there, that right there, is why I know it's gonna be a lie." *** Peter befriends Loki, and then some.

"When his dad finds out about him being Spider-Man, it's not in any way that Miles has hoped it would happen." Jefferson finds out about Miles's secret.

Anonymous asked: they're CLONES people. it's obviously clones jfc i hate this website New York's started to notice that there might be more than just one Spider-Man in town.

Peter cut in with his hands raised, placating, “We’re here because –” “You’re in mortal danger,” Noir said. “-we have something to...tell…you – okay well, I was going to be a little less blunt about it, but I suppose that’s-” “The truth!” Ham said with vigor. (Miles doesn't know who or what Venom is, but according to his friends he's about to find out.)

Wade frowns. He's had the word 'Endurance' on his wrist his whole life, in black block letters that have grown with him. He knows it means he's half of a pair, though it's too early yet to know whether he's going to be a Fighter or a Sacrifice. His dad's convinced he's going to be a Fighter--'the boy does have a type'--and he likes the sound of that. He's just not sure what his Name has to do with getting married.

Deadpool is going into heat, and he's just lost all his suppressants. To top it off, Paste Pot Pete blew up his favorite pharmacy. Spider-Man shows up as he's chasing the villain, but they end up glued together. (Thanks to Deadpool wrecking Paste Pot's equipment.) Deadpool has the chemicals Spidey needs to make a solvent to separate them back at his apartment, but does he really want his hero to find out that he's not an alpha?

Wade turns to find a very wide-eyed Peter sitting on his couch, freshly showered and fully at home-away-from-home, which would be great if Wade had any clothes on. Scrambling buck-ass-naked through the window of his own apartment was not how he intended to come out to Spiderman, but well, these sorts of things just happen to him. Gotta look into acid proof suits. “Heya Spidey,” Wade says because, well, nothing to be done about it now. He holds his arms out looking down at his own body, and well—yeah, that’s still a sight, ain’t it? “Sorry, pal, didn’t mean to shaft the funhouse onto you unawares. Get it? Shaft?” (Peter sees Wade naked and they jump into this head first. Pun intended.)

Peter’s just trying to live his life as a normal omega — as normal as an omega can be after being bitten by a radioactive spider. What he certainly did not need while out of costume and quickly falling into heat was to run into Deadpool. Alphas usually didn’t take kindly to what happened to Peter during his unique, super-powered heats. Turns out, Deadpool is the absolute opposite of upset about it.

Peter finally has a day to himself, and he decides to relax, maybe take out a couple of toys. But then Deadpool comes by and finds this remote on the counter and oh God the vibrator's still inside of him.