Shawn and Gus are stumped on a robbery case so Shawn calls the best thief in the family for advice.

For some reason, after his father's funeral Dave Sheppard keeps getting e-mail from Ronon Dex.

"We have the technology. We have the capability... Better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster." Notes: Hardison's story, companion to The Empath. Thanks to [info]hannasus for the beta.

"One should always look for any possible alternative to the exercise of destructive magic, for to be forced into the position of having to use it is a position of weakness." Notes: Takes place before The Empath and We Can Rebuild Him.

Steve closes his eyes in 1945 and wakes up in 2012. Well. They certainly didn’t put that on the recruiting poster. [Companion to The Minor Fall, the Major Lift.]

There’s a plan already forming in the back of Tony’s mind and he knows it’s teasing, but it’s not an opportunity he can willingly pass up. Sequel to Fuck Me Heels. Enjoy guys!

There it is, the word he's been trying harder than anything not to even think, and now that it's out there's no hiding from it. (aka the Angry Goat Noise remix; no spoilers for movie)

It's Darcy's first day as Tony Stark's new personal assistant. Only one thing in her closet suits this occasion.

EB: WHEN I SAID OKAY FINE JADE LET'S TRY TO **DISCREETLY** PUT OUT FEELERS I DIDN'T MEAN GO RIGHT UP TO HIM AND ASK HIM POINT BLANK IF HE'D LIKE TO STAR IN HIS OWN KINKTASTIC ALIEN PORNO!!!!!!!! GG: >:/ oh yes because "btw do you have a gf" totally means "hey do you wanna be the yummy filling in a twin sandwich" in normal people land. dont be a buttface, john!! >:( Sequel to Adventures in Collaborative Storytelling.

"They're not going to bite, you know," She drawled without even turning to look at him, as she forced a sausage-like Harleybertian leg in a leg-hole. She was smirking, though, he could tell from her voice. "Or projectile venom. Hell, even vomit wouldn't get that far." Prequel to Battlefield Terra. 3 000 words of Mr. Strider meeting his newborn clonebabies for the first time. Also features Doc Lalonde.

Bro makes a show of snorting, of relaxing his stance. His heart is still in his throat. His kids, his kids, someone almost took his kids. Someone did, and the only reason they didn't get away with it has nothing to do with him, nothing, and everything with that rabid weasel who won't. Step. Off. His balls. -- Pretty much as the title says.

You lose your pale virginity to John Egbert at a Gamzee Makara party.

Your name is JOHN EGBERT and you’ve just turned 21. It was pretty much the Best Birthday Ever, except for that awkward 10 minutes in the middle, but you got through that and everyone passed out in a properly drunken stupor. Inspired by The Finer Details of Gay Cluckbeast by clumsyoctopus. You wake up to someone kissing you.

Not all dreams are good memories for Tavros.

SOLLUX: tz, n0. SOLLUX: we are not even having this c0nversation. TEREZI: WHY NOT? >:[ SOLLUX: because it’s fucking ridicul0us, is why not. SOLLUX: i d0n’t like the guy. SOLLUX: he’s an asshole.

[sequel to 'Marvelous Things', from dave's POV.] "Camping?" you echo skeptically. Spending a week without internet access isn't something you're eager to volunteer for. And you're not exactly the outdoor type. Sunshine is not your friend. Why he would think you'd want to spend your spring break in the middle of nowhere, out in the open, sleeping in a tent... ... in a tent with John Egbert, in the middle of nowhere, just the two of you... sharing a sleeping bag for warmth... no one to hear his doofy giggling... or any other noises he might happen to make... A slow smile spreads over your face. "Whatever you want, baby."

Ex-military Eridan Ampora has an honorable discharge hanging on his wall, dreams of battlefields that haunt him around every turn and a pair of trolls who scurry around his house and snoop in his things when they think he isn't looking while they wait for their own scars to fade. Somehow, he thinks that that's enough. Inspired by Unwanted Free Ugly Troll.

For PB&J: Take one part well-aged longing, one part awkwardness, two parts enthusiasm, and a dash of possessiveness. Mix well. Season to taste with the presence of a crabby moirail in the next block. Part of Miracle Child 'verse

The alternate title to this story is, ‘How Pepper Got Her Groove Back (Not That She Ever Lost It To Begin With): A Story in Cocktails’: In which Pepper rules Stark Industries with an iron first in between drink breaks, there is way higher than Level Seven clearance at SHIELD but Phil trusts her with a lot more than that, and the Avengers really have no idea how much work has to be done to keep them afloat when it doesn't directly involve explosions.

"Once there were two hockey players. One had great hair. One had a lot of brothers. This is their story." Or, Kris Letang gets a hug and Marc Staal meets a nice boy. Inspired by Morning to Wake You

Kakashi distracts Iruka from work for a while. Written for the Porn Battle prompt: Kakashi/Iruka, authority. Porn with Characterization. Vaguely associated with the Avalanche 'verse, but not actually part of the arc.

Karkat takes his time; this trick he has learned from several drill sergeants and then from being a drill sergeant, and learned well. When you're not sure what the fuck to do with a subordinate, take your time thinking it out. There is almost no way they will notice you're completely lost at sea: they'll be too busy freaking out. It's a technique he could have used more of when he was a kid. He really has no idea what to do with the guy. -- Sequel to Uniform Kink, a pesterlog/cybersex fic in which Karkat accidentally gets Equius hot under the collar with mentions of the uniform that comes with his promotion, and then decides to run with it. -- Now with Equius POV epilogue! 2000% more fluff.

Asuka I wrote you a thing. It’s a slight AU playing with the idea of the kids having minor holdovers of their game powers. Not enough to affect day-to-day life, but just enough. All ficlets take place before they’re pilots. For some of the iffier powers I made guesses about how they would translate, most notably Dirk’s. He is the ghost in the machine. 8|

CG: BY THE WAY. CG: I SERIOUSLY HOPE YOU HAVE NOT A) DRAGGED ME INTO SOME VAMPIRES/WEREWOLVES OR VAMPIRES/HUNTERS WAR, AND B) FORGOTTEN I MIGHT CARE TO BE TOLD IF YOU WERE AT WAR WITH ANY ASSHOLES OUT HERE AND *IN DEATHLY DANGER.*

*Could we have more of the arranged marriage ficlet? Pretty please? *Oh goodness is it too late to ask for a wedding night continuation? Are these prompts still a thing?? *DaveKat: First time ( could be continuation of other prompt or not) Karkat has mad bedroom skills and Dave tries to keep his cool. * Arranged Marriage Ficlet! Tomorrow! Deverginizing Dave

"Holy crap", the guy says, sprawled on Dave’s bed with arms akimbo. Dave swallows a smirk, and pushes his hand off so he can lay down beside him, side by side. No contact though, they’re both too warm and sweaty.

Follows this chapter but isn't actually a text so I don't feel right putting it with that work.

"Jane's cute," Clint says, shoveling yet another sloppy joe into his pie-hole. Darcy has been watching him inhale a disturbing amount of food for the last half-hour. This is why she likes eating lunch with the guys instead of why-yes-I'd-love-some-brussel-sprouts-on-the-side Sharon. They're good for her ego. She may eat like a hippo, but she'll never eat as much as Steve, Clint, or Barnes. "She's totally on my FUCK shortlist." All of a sudden the crystal clear sky outside cracks with the loudest thunder Darcy has ever heard in her life. The windows rattle. Everyone freezes. Darcy can practically hear everyone's assholes tighten in fear. Because across the commissary, Thor is looking at their table. And it ain't raining panties this time. Just righteous, godly anger. -- The dudes FINALLY play MARRY FUCK KILL, not-so-Avengers edition. (Because there's like ONE actual female Avenger. Thanks, SHIELD.) Wherein no one follows the rules, everyone still kills Tony, the Mets suck, (lots of theoretical threesomes?!), and Darcy turns Clint into a hypothetical honey badger. (And honey badger don't care. Honey badger don't give a shit.)

“You’re Captain America!” I said, because he was. “Uh, hulloooo, standing right here,” Tony told me. He was using his obnoxious voice. “I know you’re there,” I said. “But Captain America! You didn’t tell me Captain America was going to be here!” A sequel to 'A Connection Is a Thing Which Requires Maintenance.'

It's three hours before JARVIS tells Steve that Tony is ready.

Because apparently this is a continuing series where Leverage crosses over into everything. Where the crew meet Castiel

The ability to render oneself intangible at will occasionally turns up as a superpower. These questions you have? Don't ask them. Notes: Takes place before The Empath and We Can Rebuild Him, but after Entropy and Chaos Magic.

The further adventures of Sidney Crosby, Professional Troll, as told by Beau Bennett. A sequel of sorts to Drop it Low, but it also stands alone.

Makoto insists that it should hurt. Shouldn't it hurt? Companion piece to This Gentle Heart Will Mess You Up by Ad_Astra (permission granted).

In an unguarded moment, Oberyn asks if Sansa's parents ever gave one another surprise gifts. For the first time in a long time, Sansa remembers her family when they were whole and happy. In the "For Fear Tonight is All" universe.

It was seven forty four PM, not that Iruka was watching the clock at all. He'd be an idiot to watch the time and expect Hatake Kakashi to show up for a date at eight o'clock.

Somewhere far away, far from the home she once knew – the home she can no longer remember, or she can but she does not wish too – there is a girl who does not remember her name, nor anything of the life she came from. Until the night she dreams of wolves.

“An exciting change for the greatest pilot in the Resistance,” the General tells him, “I would hope that we have a more successful trip than last time.” “I would argue that my last mission was very successful, ma’am.” In more ways than she knows. It’s early enough that Finn is still pretending to be asleep, and Rey is curled next to him, a tiny lump in the pile of blankets. (a sequel to room of heartbeats)

Anonymous asked: BT guys shower gangbang fantasy/embarassing wet dream? (yay for fishing old prompts out of the abyss! weirdass floaty dream ahoy. contain vague dream porn, stealth angst and dreamy creepiness. also probably happens either during the first half of chapter 7 or before chpt7 entirely.)

“Are you sure I can convince him?” Madara asks dubiously. Hashirama nods. “Only you can convince him,” Hashirama says. Then, solemnly, “Madara, you’re our only hope.”

A yellowblooded troll kid walks into a cult-run computer servicing joint, and immediately regrets it. Inspired by Cultstuck!

Sanji and Zoro show a little of their affection and mutual respect (the uninitiated say it looks a lot like 'trying to beat the shit out of each other', but that's because they don't know these two guys very well)

Sid had been simmering all day and now he was ebullient, a full boil, about to spill over. set after the October 12th, 2013 Lightning game

In his defense, he hadn't expected the Tenth to ask for individual reports.

Christophe goes through his planned day like normal. He didn’t tell Yuuri this, but noon in Japan is five AM in Switzerland. He was not up when Yuuri called. The cause was worthy.

A follow-up to Would Have, And Did. In which Rilienus' lover enjoys watching him have sex with other men, Rilienus enjoys being the centre of attention, Dorian is in charge of it all and The Iron Bull thinks that's hot. (Also some feelings).

“What’s the internet say about all this sexual tension?” Kuroo asks, and Kenma’s attention snaps back to the screen. “Nothing I didn’t see earlier. It should lessen over time, but it’s meant to cement the new bond between mated individuals. Through sex, I guess.” (( or: kenma must navigate his new and unwanted werewolf marriage with kuroo, and honestly, it would be a lot easier if they didn't get boners every time they made eye contact ))

Kirishima might not be first in the class but he's way smarter than to take Bakugou at his word about exactly what he's ready for during his next heat.

“You sure you want to do this?” Kurama rumbles. Underneath him, Shisui makes a strangled sound, sucking in a hard breath and squeezing his eyes shut. “Oh gods, please don’t do the voice thing or there won't be anything to do.”

The rumor spoke of a boy who could speak with the dead, a glimmer of hope for ones like you, ones unable to rest in peace.