Deadpool vs. Kylo Ren. The conclusion is foregone.

'cause we make a great team Boredom's a real killer when you've topped your resume by taking down an international criminal organization. Wade's been in the market for a new pet project, and who should happen to come along but our friendly neighborhood Spider-Man? Peter's understandably a little shy of our charming Merc with the Mouth, but luckily for him, he happens to know a certain damsel not-so-much-in-distress that's willing to serve as an excellent character witness. From there it's just a short hop, skip, and one huge leap for spiderkind into a whole new world of trouble for our web-slinging hero. Good thing he's starting to learn to like trouble. Featuring: stalking (for justice and otherwise), showtunes, a series of increasingly improbable dinner dates, the Apartment of Doom, a judicious amount of mad science, homoerotic fight sequences, highly sexual tai-chi, musical montages, and a truly sickening amount of domestic bliss.

“Wade and I have a tradition whenever one of us turns out not to be dead.” She smiles at Cable politely. “Would you like to stay for dinner?” “And by dinner, she means bare minimum twelve hours of the most animalistic ravaging of each others’ naughty bits that you can see outside Bangkok, big boy. Really putting the freak in fan-freaking-tastic multi-orgasmic cum-marathon.” “So what do you say?” Cable grinds his jaw for a second, but honestly, who would pass up these A-listers? “Why the hell not?”

It's been a reasonably quiet night thus far, enough so that Peter's well ahead of the game on his usual patrol route, nothing really pinging his radar until he reached this quiet strip of apartment buildings. Only now that he's here, he can't figure out where the danger's coming from, or even what his senses are classifying as danger this time. There's got to be something, though...right?