just two hormonal teenaged boys talking about their dicks.

Love advice with Canadians: the clueless leading the clueless who is in love with clueless.

Armin, Eren and Mikasa inherit a brothel. A very classy brothel, that's popular with the military. They have no idea what they're doing, but with Armin's cunning, Mikasa's ability to kick ass, and Eren's mysterious kink-discovering skills, they pull through okay. Mostly.

From snkkink. On the night of their graduation, the 104th recruits have a wild celebration and get drunk. Really drunk. None more drunk than Those Three. (And they are crazy drunks.) The last anyone sees of them, they are in full 3DMG and hurtling themselves off Wall Rose, screaming something about seeing the ocean. The next morning, the hangover is impressive, three graduates are missing, and a path of destruction leads away from Wall Rose. As for Armin, Eren and Mikasa, they wake up at the ocean. They're not sure how they got there, but getting back is one hell of an adventure. There may have been some cults founded. Armin might be an evil mastermind. And, hey, Eren can turn into a Titan. That might just be the least weird part.

In which people with floofy pauldrons like Cullen should probably not stand so close to the woman waving around a lit candle on the end of a board.

Jason Todd isn't what Batman made him, he isn't what the Joker made him, he isn't what the League of Assassins made him, and he isn't what the Lazarus Pit made him. He's his own person and he's taking himself back, one home renovation at a time. Also he might just make friends with the people who are supposed to be his brothers while he's at it.

fic where there is a supernatural threat to New York City and the Avengers show up to handle it but when they get there the Ghostbusters are already dusting off their hands and hosing off the slime

From the Legendary Sannin, to Jiraiya's genin team with Namikaze Minato, to Minato's genin team of Rin, Obito, and Kakashi... Team Seven can't manage to hand in normal paperwork. The genin are either completely oblivious or having fun with this, the jounin-sensei are one step away from ripping all their hair out, and the formidable order of desk-shinobi is not pleased with this. And then there's Team Kakashi.

A collection of ficlet-like rambles and other HP-centric stuff from my tumblr. Ficlet-Ramble #1: Seventh-Year will put Your Name in GOF for a Sickle You’re a first-year who can’t cast Wingardium Leviosa yet? Whatever, sure, just pay up. There’s no way you're going to be chosen against Angelina “Can Probably Crush You With Her Thighs” Johnson, but at least you can tell all your eleven-year-old buddies that you Did A Cool Thing.

For a prompt from the lovely Holly: The Free! anime featuring Tobirama as a swimmer, with a water addiction like Haruka - and the same penchant for undressing at the first sight of water. Cue Madara blushing and flailing, while Tobirama gives zero shits.

Fuck. Victor looked awful today after he got off the ice. He wasn’t even looking at the medal before they took it away to get his name engraved. He looked like he wasn’t even there. Yuri just wishes Victor would talk to someone (preferably not him) because fuck, he needs him. Victor’s actually a pretty good guy, once you get past the questionable taste in clothes (he forbids animal patterns. Like, really, dude? Such an old man) and, somehow, he’s always managed to inspire Yuri. He’s shown him moves, scolded him when he stayed too late the rink, and he’s always commented on all of his performances, just to show he was watching. And Victor likes watching movies with him, and volunteers to watch his siblings from time to time, when Yuri just needs to get away, for once. Victor buys him cat stickers for his birthday, even though he pretends it’s a kid’s gift and he doesn’t like it, and doesn’t say anything when he puts them on his notebooks. Victor’s kind of like an older brother, if Yuri wanted one. Which he doesn’t. He really doesn’t. // Yuri is done with Victor's shit. And he's done with Yuuri's too, fuck him. He's so done.

Zoro and Sanji's second time. The less said about the first...

"Zoro!" Luffy gave him a happy grin, looked out at sea...swung his head about to give his first mate a slightly longer look centered on the latter's new bust line, then back up at Zoro's face as he waved excitedly. "Hurry up! Nami says the log pose will set here if we wait too long, and then we won't be able to sail to Merman Island because we'll be set on another course. Hey, do you know your clothes are too big?"

concept: willy wonka and harry potter take place in the same universe the ministry of magic haaaates Willy Wonka

Aka everyone is a superhero or a sidekick or a damsel in distress in true comic style. Includes terrible hero names, almost everyone wearing spandex (Sakumo why must you be sensible and break the mold you nerd), ridiculousness, secret identity fails, and all of my favorite crack pairings. I would be sorry, but that would require a sense of shame and I misplaced mine long ago.

He was completely unfazed by Ryuji’s doubt. “I can be very charming,” Akira assured him magnanimously. “I’ll have you know I’m a man of many talents. I’m sure any number of my skills will help me win him over.” Ryuji raised a sardonic eyebrow at him. “‘Talents?’ What, you mean like breaking and entering, assault, and hostage negotiation?” A blank, glasses-blocked stare. “You don’t think those will help?”

Harmon knows how this goes. He's from Nevarra, and he's read books. Plural. If you want to fight a dragon you need to find a Kindly Mentor who can teach you all their Secret Strategies. So all he needs to do is find this old Tal-Vashoth dragonslayer his cousin keeps going on about, get him to teach Harmon about dragons, convince everyone else to go along with his dragon-hunting plans, fight a dragon, and win. Easy, right? Starring one cheerful qunari grandpa, one grumpy necromancer grandpa, and a bunch of Nevarran mercenaries who are about to have a very educational experience.

Obito glances over Sakura, sprawled out on the couch painting her nails, and raises a brow. “I thought Kakashi told you to leave?” “Ha.” Sakura checks her nails, then starts applying another coat. “He has like three hundred sports channels. I'm not moving an inch.”

At Shells Town, Luffy does not meet Roronoa Zoro. Instead, he acquires a sword.

Once upon a time in Yiling, a rumor started about the Yiling Patriarch having started to collect a harem of beautiful young men from a variety of sects. (it was Nie Huaisang's fault) (to be fair, the porn didn't help)

“Thank you all for coming,” Lan Xichen said, pouring tea for the other three people at the table. “I think you all know why I’ve asked you to gather here today.” “Sure,” Nie Mingjue said, accepting the cup. “Because our younger siblings have decided to join together to become a criminal gang.” “That seems like an unduly harsh way to put it,” Jiang Yanli murmured, inclining her head in thanks to Lan Xichen as she took her own. “After all, they’re helping people, aren’t they?” Wen Qing huffed. “Leverage,” she drawled. “If I ever find out who gave them that idea…!”

A very specific part of Jin Ling's Yunmeng Jiang heritage makes itself known when he comes of age. His friends help him out.

In an attempt to find an ancient weapon that will let them fight a Sith Lord on equal ground, Jon seeks out a lost Jedi Temple on a war-torn world. Saving two clone troopers isn't anywhere in the plan, and letting them tag along with him seems like inviting trouble, but Jon does it anyway. It's possible that Knol has a point about his instincts getting him killed one of these days.

Boba attempts to set his father up with someone interesting. It would probably go a lot smoother if that someone wasn't a Jedi. And if there weren't monsters all around the town that were about to make themselves a problem.

"Hi, I'm Wei Wuxian. I'm a Career Omega and this is my fourth season on the show. I like spicy food, archery and alphas who are funny. Or maybe I don't, I haven't rolled over for one yet." On-screen, Wei Wuxian winks at the audience laughter. Hot or Knot is the world's most popular reality TV show. Part dating show, part survival show, Hot or Knot is everyone's guilty pleasure - and Wei Wuxian is a fan favourite. - The Love Island/Hunger Games reality dating tv show A/B/O au

CPS Agent, pointing at Tim Drake: We need to take him with us Red Hood: He's fine where he is CPS: He's a minor Hood: Timbo, you a minor? Tim: Can't prove it CPS: I mean, I can. There are records – Tim, who has just finishing hacking CPS to remove his own file: Oh really, tell me more about these records +++ A CPS agent gets sent to investigate a tip that Tim Drake has been abandoned by his parents and is living with the Red Hood. The CPS agent leaves with no Tim Drake, a date with Red Hood's lieutenant, and an intern who's promising to fix the IT systems at his office. It's a weird day for Theo.

The Republic sends a combat photographer to be attached to the 212th until further notice, citing the need for a morale boost. The clones make up a fake clone, citing the absolute fact that it is very funny. Somehow, these two things save the galaxy.

"So, uh . . ." Kon says, skeptically eyeing the softly glowing rock in his hand. Metallo, like, threw it at his head. He has no idea why. "Is this supposed to do something or . . . ?" "It's pink," Kara says leerily, staying very firmly back.