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FANDOM IS SRS BZNESS
So then, because he’s Hardison, he created a fandom.
The Great Muppet-Angel-Leverage Caper
This story starts, as many of the greatest stories in history do, with a talking frog. You could argue that it starts sometime before that, with a vampire that's been turned into a puppet. According to Eliot, the word again should be tagged onto the end of that sentence. Or you could argue that it starts with that said puppet walking into a bar.
Improvise
Avengers at the State Fair: “What is Thor eating?” James asked. “Walking taco. With … ice cream.” "How many tickets did Coulson give him?” "Too many.”
Zombie Invasions are Boring, Let's Play Video Games Instead
"On the bright side," Dick says as he shimmies down the building, "You didn't raise a group of homicidal, raging, vengeful killers and sociopaths so much as you raised a group of emotionally-volatile, obsessive, spiteful vigilantes and paper pushers."
The Unicorns Were Unplanned
"Why does Ra's know how old my piercings are?" Tim asks, and does he know where they are.
Archangel in Exile
Apparently Supernatural was real, which was presumably why Gabriel was bleeding out onto Richard’s floor. (In which the actors of Supernatural find that reality is stranger and more disturbing than they previously believed, even counting Misha, and an injured archangel discovers that his universe is the subject of a TV show.)
The mind is its own place
“Eternity is really rather boring, John. Mortal life seemed as though it would be far more interesting.” Sherlock is actually the Devil, but he decided to live as a mortal because ruling Hell was boring.
In Fair Verona (the no such thing as dignity remix)
Looking at the contemplative expression on Lucifer's face, Sam thinks that this has the potential to be either very bad, or completely awesome. Two humans and two archangels in the Cage.
In Fair Verona
Lucifer's cage is kind of cramped quarters.
Cards Against Certain Avengers
Cards Against Humanity is not a good game to play with the Avengers, just not for the reasons that Clint was expecting.
Secrets And Lies
Naruto has a secret. So does Sasuke. And Sakura. Just how were the genin teams picked again?
let's do that again
The SNK characters' happy reincarnated life is rudely interrupted by kaiju marching out of the Pacific. They are 100% done with this crap.
Dragon’s Teeth
The Aegis swings by Earth with a request of Her Royal Highness every once in a while.
This Humanity's One Miracle Answer Specimen
THOMAS is the gladers' one hope of escaping the maze. He's also a brain in a jar.
Kink-quisition
Cassandra stumbles across a secret literature-exchange society in Skyhold. She disapproves, of course. Deeply. (That person who keeps prompting for crossovers with characters out of Varric's novels? Not her.)
How Team Seven Got Their Summon Animals
"Once upon a time in Fire Country, O my Best Beloved, three Ninjas went on a D-rank mission to retrieve a Cat..." A tale in the style of Rudyard Kipling's Just So Stories. Very silly.
Aesthetic
Despite the fact that Nozaki constantly insists that he’ll follow Ken-san to any department, they hadn’t quite figured that he meant it. That was mistake number one. Letting Nozaki-kun have free rein when it came to positioning them for his artwork, that was mistake number two.
If Jane Austen wrote The Empire Strikes Back
He dueled him for many a long minute, and then trapping him at the end of a gantry, removed his hand from his wrist. Luke was surprised, but said not a word beyond his cry of pain. After a silence of several minutes, Vader came towards him in an agitated manner, and thus began,
Customer Service in the Food Industry
They were starving. That was reason enough for Zeff to open the Baratie's doors and feed them, whoever the hell they were.
Hoth Headcanons and the Saga of Stabby
We all know that Hoth was a simmering mess of hormones and stress and I would pay good money for a soap opera about them. Here are some things which Definitely Happened. (Featuring Stabby who is definitely not a space doomba.)
Spawn
"You're fucking with me." Tim blinks up at his uncle – and he's never seen his uncle in full armor before, not in person. It's kind of daunting. "Please tell me you're fucking with me, spawn."
Cookie Predictions
It starts when he’s five, when his mother brings home a bag of fortune cookies and explains what the strips of paper inside them are for.
When Bookmarks Were In Mustache Land
GEEK CHORUS Holy shit. These guys are great. MACIEJ Singular! It's just little ol' me over here. GEEK CHORUS This dude is like Tom Hardy. He can't possibly be real. Maybe we should try this Pinboard thing out. LONGTIME PINBOARD USERS What's this? People are bookmarking fanfic on our website? Whatever will we do? MACIEJ I dunno guys, maybe try "/search/?query=bigboypanties+&mine"?
Say Boys Don't You See Them Bones
In which Tsuna’s the Corpse Whisperer. (Or: In the months he spends at the Varia Compound at Timoteo’s behest, Tsuna manages to stumble across enough forgotten dead bodies to fill entire cemeteries. And everyone is terribly amused. Except, y’know, for him.)
The Ship Has NOT Sailed
Jason has small, meaningless interactions with his family. The media outlets of Gotham disagree.
Burning Leaf
In a world where Fugaku has three sons, he wishes he'd stopped at the one. There's nothing wrong with the youngest, it's just... The middle child.
Where is the power that made your pride?
Hibari Kyouya travels in time and takes over the world. Basically crack.
Bruce Wayne Youtube Compilations
tim drake’s snapchat is 90% him making bruce wayne do normal middle-class american things and filming the results.
i laugh at the concept of life as a simple result of the sun
“-my mother was not Lyanna fucking Stark!” Jon exclaimed, before turning and kicking, vehemently at the sofa, enough to leave brown dustmarks on the purple cloth. He turned back to her, lifting a finger threateningly. “I don’t care what you say. But our father would never- never- sleep with his sister, in fact I don’t even know why I’m telling you this because guess what, Sansa? You should already know that!” [Sansa tries to tell Jon who his mother is. Jon thinks he’s an incest-baby. Which........ isn’t wrong.]
Now in the errant sun
In which Tsuna has some fairly inconvenient opinions, Iemitsu has been happily living in denial for years, and Reborn now somehow has to sell organised crime to a bunch of student hippie activists. He is not amused.
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world
Tsuna is dead. Hayato decides that is Not Acceptable. And proceeds to break space time to fix it. He regrets nothing. Except for the fact that he arrives back in Italy, half a world away from his Sky. He then embarks on the epic mafia road trip from hell to find his Sky, along with three escaped lab experiments, one kidnapped mafia heir, one runaway schoolkid on a field trip to Paris, and a dog called Spot. Or the one where Hayato is incredibly Extra about everything, and no-one but Dino notices.
Uchiha Itachi must die
Itachi was a good looking troubled teenager left to wander the country unsupervised in the company of a group of insane criminals. He may have made a few questionable decisions involving alcohol and women. It is also worth noting that no-one actually got around to explaining the use of a condom to him. The results are depressingly predictable. Or the one where Itachi missed shinobi sex ed and ended up creating spawn across half the elemental nations, which Sasuke somehow ends up responsible for.
Naruto and the Children of Chaos (Or: how to raise adorable murder children and take over the mafia world)
When Uzumaki Naruto breathed his last, he didn’t expect to wake up in the world of the living again. He was old, and tired, and so, so ready to move on. And, well...he wanted to see his wife again, dammit. But, of course, that wasn't what happened. Why? Naruto screamed at the powers-that-loved-to-fuck-with-his-life-and-now-his-afterlife-too, with tears streaking down his cheeks, feeling cold, weak, hungry, and utterly disgusted. Because you’re everybody’s bitch, Kurama helpfully supplied.
That's a bribe.
"So," User(s) panted, pulling out of the WSFS lawyer(s) and falling sideways onto the bed. "You'll let us say we all won Hugos now right?"
Time Travel, Obviously
“If we get home, you mean,” the Jin sect junior muttered. “Where even are we? And who’s the guy playing Chenqing?” Wei Wuxian was mildly offended. Who in the world knew enough to recognize Chenqing on sight but couldn’t recognize him? “I’m pretty sure that’s Senior Wei,” the shorter Lan sect junior said. “Just, you know, not…Senior Mo.”
Chief Cultivator Yao
"You can't seriously be suggesting that we elect Sect Leader Yao to be Chief Cultivator!" “I don’t see the problem,” Nie Mingjue said, heroically maintaining a straight face despite the slightest curve in his eyes that indicated a man who knew exactly what the problem with his suggestion was. “According to all the stories I’ve heard him tell, Sect Leader Yao has been at the forefront of every action in the past few years, large or small - no matter where or how implausibly quickly he must have traveled to get there.”
The Qiongqi
In preparing their ambush, the Jin sect was careful to get rid of all the human corpses at the Qiongqi Path - They forgot that the reason the path got its name was that, many years ago, Wen Mao killed the great beast, the Qiongi - and when Wei Wuxian started playing, he noticed that there was still some dead thing, deep beneath the ground...
Tigers
In which Jin Guangyao and Lan Xichen discover something very interesting about the Nie sect, and what exactly a "qi deviation" means when it comes to the main Nie clan. ...also, tigers.
A Sick Thought
“It’s not wrong if you write it down,” Mo Xuanyu muttered to himself like a mantra as he scribbled down a rough explanation of what he was going to do. “If you write it down, it’s just an experiment, and that makes it okay.” That’s what they used to say back at Koi Tower, back when they were doing all those bad things. They also said that you’re supposed to try stuff out before you do the real thing, because practice makes perfect. And anyway, surely it wouldn't hurt to put the cat in the middle of the body-sacrificing array before he put himself in - the array ran on resentment, on revenge, and how much resentment could a cat possibly have?
Death-Sharing
“You are never allowed to do this again,” Jiang Cheng’s mother said, her voice harsh in the way that means she was scared, because she hated being scared. “Never again, you hear me?” “I hear you, a-niang,” Jiang Cheng said. “Did it live?” “Yes, of course it lived,” Madame Yu snapped. “You’re the one that nearly died! You can’t – death-sharing is a rare gift, A-Cheng, but you can’t use it too often, you hear me? Every time you use it, your own life gets shorter. You must never do it again. And you mustn’t tell anyone else about it! No one at all! Swear to me!” “I swear,” he said. “No one at all.”
Untitled Goose of the Ming Dynasty
It's a lovely morning in the capital, and you have acquired a horrible goose.
Where The Sky Meets The Sea
The children of the Sea have always chased after the horizon with a fire in their hearts that drove them ever forward to reach the place were the sky kisses the water. Not even death can stop the Will of D from echoing across the world. Sawada Tsunayoshi is the responsible older brother to three wild and mischievous little brothers. Tsuna loves them and they love him back. Now if only the world around them would stop catching fire so easily all the time, that would be fantastic. (The Will of D joins with the Flames of Sky in a Harmony that will bring forth the storm of change.)
Feminine Mystique
“- and in one generation, they were all women, every single one of them!” “That seems remarkably unlikely,” Wen Ruohan remarked, and looked sidelong at Lan Qiren. “Don’t you think, Sect Leader Lan?” Lan Qiren had no idea the trouble his answer was about to cause.
Catching Bees
“You scored very highly—” “As fuckin’ usual.” “—but your interpersonal skills are still unbelievably low. If you are going to be a pro hero you need to be capable of working on a team—sometimes even one composed of people you don’t like.” Aizawa seemed to have roused himself from the edge of sleep long enough to impart this wisdom to Blasty. “Whatever. Just tell me what I’m doing.” Bakugou didn’t seem very moved. Mina thought one might need a backhoe to achieve such a thing. Aizawa zipped himself up in his sleeping bag. “Go around the classroom and give everyone an honest compliment.”
How a Romance Novel Saved the Galaxy
In one galaxy, the novel was never read. In another, it starts a landslide. Or what happens when the Mandalorians learn that the Jedi are exactly what most of them look for in a partner.
Glitterbomb
Absurdity, what if the people in the Qui-gon Jinn Hate Squad from ArianaDeralte's How a Romance Novel Saved the Galaxy decided to send Qui-gon a glitter-bomb card?
Got Without Merit
Jin Guangshan has a certain reputation when it comes to bastard children - a reputation he lives up to when Meng Yao arrives at, and is summarily thrown out of, Jinlin Tower. Unfortunately for Jin Guangshan, his actions are witnessed by all the other sect leaders of the time...and Lan Qiren, at least, has some objections.
Trust Me, I'm an Alchemist
In which Yuri Plisetsky began life with the name Edward Elric, and this has made the world of figure skating a significantly stranger and more alarming place. “Are you saying you lived a life of crime before you began skating?” “I’m gonna have to check the statute of limitations on a couple things and get back to you on that.”
Looping Back to the Beginning
Where Class 1-A finds itself in a time loop centered around their first year at UA. After getting over the usual angst, they decide that the best way to grow as heroes is by antagonizing dangerous villains for fun and amusement.
vegetarian option
Something explodes on Promised Day.
