“The electrician is a Tang dynasty spy,” he says, dumping some of his eggs in Tang Fan’s bowl. Tang Fan nods, shovels more food in his mouth, and starts talking again.

If he hadn't seen a vibrating butt plug on top of the stack of "absolutely mission critical clothes" Wang Zhi had left for him, Sui Zhou would have dismissed the faint buzzing as a phone vibrating, and Tang Fan's look of shock as a surprising bite of food. It's not. He is definitely wearing a vibrating butt plug and it definitely just turned on. Sui Zhou is not sure what to do with this information.

Three days after Wang Zhi leaves the capital, bits and pieces of his extensive library begin arriving at Sui Zhou's house.

“It is fair.” Tang Fan says decisively, getting up, heading to the bedroom. “While I think about what kind of purchase that could make you act like this, you can think about whether it is worth keeping a secret.” or Sui Zhou goes on Tao/bao

"Surely I don't need underthings to be in proper disguise," Tang Fan says, chewing on his lip.

In which there’s a jewellery thief on the loose, Tang Fan plays dress up, gets a mild concussion and also a boyfriend.

Dong-er wasn’t dumb, she had seen these symptoms before, she knew what they meant. Tang Da-ge’s pregnant.

The Emperor looks at Tang Fan’s confused face and elaborates. “Tang Fan, you have caused quite a stir in the palace,” he pauses, “as Lady Tang.” Tang Fan frowns at Sui Zhou and Wang Zhi, both who are not quite meeting his eyes. “Your majesty, I don’t understand.” The Emperor smiles. “It is simple. The Empress Dowager wants a wedding. If you marry into the palace, Noble Consort Wan will be unhappy. If you don’t marry Sui Zhou, the Empress Dowager will be unhappy. We don’t want them unhappy.” - In which every party is once again scheming, Tang Fan and Sui Zhou are pawns, but somehow it ends up okay.

Under absolutely no circumstances is Runqing allowed to touch the wok.

Tang Fan chats up a drunk patron to get some evidence.

If Tang Fan believed Sui Zhou harbored any amorous intent towards him, well, to put it mildly, Sui Zhou wouldn’t need to lace his tea with any aphrodisiacs.

To draw out a likely blackmailer, Sui Zhou and Tang Fan have to manufacture some blackmail material.

Tang Fan writes a new romance novel that reaches new heights of obvious pining, Wang Zhi takes matters into his own hands, a guest comes to stay, and Sui Zhou continues to be a irresponsible combination of jealous and oblivious. (This takes place somewhere nebulously in the middle of the series, but really it could happen at any point, no spoilers)

Sui Zhou just wants a drink to take the edge off after a shit day.

Tang Fan needs some help blocking out some positions for his latest novel.