Bonding over sleepless nights, incoherency, and pizza. Because sometimes, you need a friend. "Sure you won't come up for a drink? You know, as long as you're in the neighborhood." "I bet you say that to all the defrosted soldiers on your doorstep at three in the morning."

EB: WHEN I SAID OKAY FINE JADE LET'S TRY TO **DISCREETLY** PUT OUT FEELERS I DIDN'T MEAN GO RIGHT UP TO HIM AND ASK HIM POINT BLANK IF HE'D LIKE TO STAR IN HIS OWN KINKTASTIC ALIEN PORNO!!!!!!!! GG: >:/ oh yes because "btw do you have a gf" totally means "hey do you wanna be the yummy filling in a twin sandwich" in normal people land. dont be a buttface, john!! >:( Sequel to Adventures in Collaborative Storytelling.

Choose lasagna as good first meal for boy humans (1) and boy trolls (1) to show you can overcome this cooking thing. Feel impugned when Rose suggests you would both eat popcorn between two slices of bread and call it a day. Advise her you only did that the once.

"and you never guessed/the one you loved best/to draw always drew/pictures of you/undressed." A fairly plotless accumulation of pornographic pennings, courtesy of one Dave Strider.

“It's a contingency plan in case of accidental teenagering,” says Stark.

The pack asks Stiles to find a way to get Derek to chill out. This is the best he can come up with.

It is important to keep in mind that when a human says, "I hate you," it is most certainly not a come-on. The only thing more horrific than human apathy is human hatred. They do, after all, have two words for friendship. Or so we thought.

Stiles has a preference for written porn. He also has a thing for Derek's voice. So when Derek finds his erotica collection, this is clearly either the best or the worst thing that's ever happened to him.

rom the 2011 kink meme. The prompt was: In Fast and Furious when Braga asks Dom and Brian if they know each other, what if instead of saying 'He used to date my sister' Dom decided not to make Brian's undercover assignment easy for him and mess with his head a little by saying 'We used to date' instead.

His body had grown, not quite to full adulthood, but close enough. With that came things that didn’t quite add up for the young boy stuck living in it.

Abed leaves a message for Annie and Troy. Complicated film theory, and three revelations (of which only one is surprising), lie therein.

30 young sand sibling drabbles, wherein Temari is (sometimes) a lady, Kankurou doesn't play nice with the other kids, and Gaara is perhaps a little socially inept.

The Leverage team gets called in to find and help someone caught between something he doesn't think he's earned and something no one deserves. A MCU Leverage AU that solely exists because Parker would GROK Bucky so fucking hard, y’all. This started as a joke about Magic Mike XXL, and is, in whole, the fault of Katemonster, They Who Transcend All Genders.

aka Steve Accidentally Joins the NY Pride Parade. He had just meant to go to the grocer’s. They needed eggs.

Somewhere far away, far from the home she once knew – the home she can no longer remember, or she can but she does not wish too – there is a girl who does not remember her name, nor anything of the life she came from. Until the night she dreams of wolves.

In which a case of early-morning mistaken identity goes very, very right.

Dave and Karkat have storytime with the trollmance novel. -If Dave isn’t going to get jolly over some fantasy troll getting eaten out, he is maybe going to get a little jolly over Karkat getting jolly over some fantasy troll getting eaten out.-

When you ask if you can tie Karkat up tonight, he’s basically not surprised at all. It’s not an all-the-time-always thing, but it’s pretty standard! So he’s not surprised, no, but he still goes bright red and shrugs with one shoulder and says sure, he guesses he doesn’t have a problem with it (like you can’t totally see just how hard he’s blushing). It’s pretty dang adorable.

Dorian enjoys being fingered while Bull watches television and Bull certainly has no complaints.

It's Sid's job as captain to match up the subs on his team with suitable Doms. It doesn't take long to figure out that the only Dom he would trust Jamie Benn's particular needs to is himself.

Usually I’m not the kinda guy to end things prematurely, but you may have noticed that a certain scene in my movie (I know you know the one I mean) got cut off before it really had a chance to get started. So here it is, for all your perverted pegging pleasure: my full-length, uncut account of International Women’s Day.

Yuri has joined the conversation. v-nikiforov: d i b s

Yuuri pounded on the back door of the strip club urgently. A security guard opened it, took one look at the desperate, drunk, giggling man in front of him, and started to close it promptly. “Wait!” Yuuri blurted out, trying to look serious. “Please, just hear what I have to say.” “Please listen to him,” Phichit begged, his eyes glittering with maniacal glee. “This might be the best thing that will ever happen in my entire life.” (post episode 10 - in which Yuuri gets drunk, Viktor probably gets a boner, and Phichit finally gives his best man's speech)

“Do you have any kinks?” Viktor looked down at Phichit, surprised. “Excuse me?” “Fetishes. Turn-ons. Things that make you go, ‘Oooh! Wow! Yeah!’” “I know what a kink is. Why are you asking me that kind of question?” “Don’t look so scandalized. It’s for my psychology project. Which I just told you about, but you were too busy drooling over Yuuri to listen,” Phichit said. (post episode 7 - In which Viktor is enlightened, Phichit is a little shit, and Yuuri frantically searches for ways to keep surprising Viktor)

From the other end of the ship, panting as though he has run from the depths of his workshop, Usopp is the next to let out a scream: “Why is there a SHARK ON THE DECK!?”

You know how this is going to go.

Tsuna and Xanxus get married. Tsuna and Xanxus get even.

In which Tsuna’s the Corpse Whisperer. (Or: In the months he spends at the Varia Compound at Timoteo’s behest, Tsuna manages to stumble across enough forgotten dead bodies to fill entire cemeteries. And everyone is terribly amused. Except, y’know, for him.)

Lance likes games. Through a lot of trial and error, this is what Keith has learned: the more random and casual Lance is being, the closer Keith needs to be listening, because it means Lance is trying to tell him something important.

Tsuna has never wanted to be a mafia boss. Nobody else seems to understand this. Perhaps its time to make them.

Tsuna has never wanted to be a mafia boss. Nobody else seems to understand this. Perhaps its time to make them.

Bianchi is asexual. Unfortunately, she is an asexual woman in the mafia. And for women in the mafia, that is Not. An. Option.

“It was science,” Tobirama huffs, turning his glare on Madara. “You left your DNA all over me, Uchiha. I was hardly about to pass up the opportunity.” Obito debates clamping his hands over his ears and humming loudly. He did not need to know that in any shape or form, oh god.

Maes wakes up in the Elemental Countries after his death, and promptly gets into trouble. Genma gets him out of it.

Adele has some questions about Xander and Xiang's relationship.

“You get either one more complaint or one more kiss before I gag you,” Shōta interrupts. “Choose wisely.”

In which Ren can be just as exasperating to Nora as Nora can be to him.

Two dorks raise a baby and don't even realise they're doing it together until it's too late Alternatively, Ryan Bergara is Trying His Best Thanks

"Hey there, ghosts," Midoriya says, "it's me, ya boy." The dorms are haunted. Shenanigans ensue.

[a tribute to dornish women; sainted, besmirched, or misunderstood] Doran went still in a temper; cold, steady as the mountain passes in the moments before lightning struck. Oberyn raged, louder than any storm. Elia smiled, thin and small, and struck.

Everyone knows about Duo's ghosts. He collects them. But when he collects them, they feel lighter somehow. Some ghosts stay longer than others. For Unnatural November.

Everyone is so focused on preparing for the hurricane that they miss a series of storms, each one longer than the last. You don't get to where Claire has without having a hell of a good method of compartmentalizing things that need to get done from things that don't have the luxury of happening.

“You know,” Zabuza gets out on a laugh, “I didn’t think you had it in you.” Kakashi shoves his knee up higher, slams into him so hard it makes Zabuza gasp. “I'm not the one with it in me,” he says mildly.

The dragons were devoted to the children first and foremost, but Drogon would snap and flame at anyone who came too close to Rhaella, Balerion could on occasion be found curled up on Elia's lap while she worked, and Ghost had once arranged himself just so along the back of the Iron Throne while Lyanna held court in her husband's absence - it was the most productive court session she'd ever been party to. Or, Rhaegar marries Lyanna Stark, and runs away with Elia Martell

When Ryan comes home, covered in blood, Shane is ready for it.

“What,” Kakuzu says flatly. The redheaded witch who foiled his assassination sips her tea, for all the world like Kakuzu isn't trussed up like a sacrificial offering at her feet. “I said my husband thinks you're handsome,” she repeats, as if that will remove the sheer insanity from those five words. “I tried to kill him,” Kakuzu says incredulously. “I stabbed him in the chest.”

“Thank you,” he says, and the words feel like they don’t fit right in his mouth. What are you supposed to say, really, when someone gives you a piece of their spirit-form? Especially under these circumstances. Shisui wishes treason came with some kind of manual. Maybe a book full of helpful hints. When plotting to overturn decades of hatred and stop a war by lying to the whole world, be careful not to offend the man giving you his teeth to wear as earrings.

When Jace gets dark urges to be bitten and kissed, fucked and used, it's Simon he goes to. Like an addict looking for a fix to hit the right spot he keeps on coming back for more.

Kakashi is enjoying this a hell of a lot more than he thought he would, and he had high expectations going in.

“What is that?” Tobirama demands incredulously. “Your way out of this system,” Kushina says cheerfully, and Tobirama suddenly understands far better why she’s hanging on his arm like she’s going to physically pin him in place.