when Severus gives Harry and Draco detention, he has no idea that he's in for some peripheral pleasure.

Harry and Draco try to keep quiet while Snape is sniffing around...

Underage!Sam/OFC divirginizing fic. Sam knows Dean's watching, but she doesn't.

Sora sees Riku in a new light. Then he sees Riku again in a...newer light.

Anyway, [info]vickita said something a couple of weeks back that made me think, "Ah yes, Eliot, the little black dress of Leverage fandom." and sure enough, there's fic out there pairing Eliot with pretty much everyone. So, in a way, this is her fault...

So Alec had randomly mentioned that he was actually just gonna stay home on Thanksgiving and yes, as Eliot so awesomely put it, "play stupid video games."

Actually, "pervy dragonfic" is really working for me, here.

A conversation about their personal habits leads Souji to prove to the team that he's just as capable of being dirty as they are.

Janet folded her arms around her clipboard and smiled at the two men who stood staring at her, holding specimen cups and wearing nearly identical expressions of disbelief. "Washington wants to know if multiple trips through the Stargate has had any effect on reproductive ability. They want sperm count and sperm motility of all personnel who go off world, checked."

Knocking is a virtue.

This morning I accidentally walked in on my brother and his boyfriend having sex. Thirty three times.

kynxpirations anonymeme prompt Shannon/Tim Voyeur Tomo

Written for the prompt: Scott and/or Jackson come over to see Derek and find Derek and Stiles fucking (the rougher, more animalistic, bitey, knotting, etc the better). Scott/Jackson end up secretly watching them, getting totally turned on and jerking off. Bonus if Derek is totally aware they're being watched and puts on a show (preferably, with Stiles unaware).

Clint sees everything, no matter the situation, no matter how many naked bodies there may be to distract him.

Alright, look, confession - Tony has been masturbating to Captain America since he was thirteen.

For an LJ avengerkink prompt: Steve is very confused/weirded out by the distinct lack of pubic hair on modern women (or at least the women Tony has forcibly exposed him to). Sure he's a virgin, but he's seen naughty pictures/European burlesque shows. Therefore he's more than a little apprehensive when Natasha finally gets her panties off. Luckily she's a firm believer in giving her partners something to hold on to. Steve goes wild. +1 - it happens during group sexytimes and all the others stop what they're doing to watch Steve eat her out

CG: HARLEY, WHEN I SAID THAT I WOULD RATHER CULL MYSELF WITH THE DULL END OF A SCALEMATE BEFORE I EVER GAVE YOU THE CHANCE TO RECOIL IN ABJECT REVULSION BEFORE MY HIDEOUS VISAGE CG: WHAT THE FUCK GAVE YOU THE IDEA THAT I WOULD SOMEHOW BE AMENABLE TO INSTEAD PERFORMING A DAPPER SHOW AND TELL ROUTINE?

Generally speaking, Kaner is the kind of girl you hear before you see coming. In some cases, literally. --- AKA the one where Jonny accidentally watches Kaner and Segs fucking over skype.

Danny is bruised. Their werewolf drama has officially bruised Danny. This is the worst day ever.

Kaner apparently starred in a porno at some point in his life. Jonny becomes very, very invested in watching it. Repeatedly.

It’s not-- it’s not because they’re perverted or something. It’s not. It’s a comfort thing to sit still and extend his senses, focusing on the alpha and his mate.

As road roommates and partners in crime, Burish and Sharpie consider it their god-given responsibility to torment the young stars on their team. One night, they get more then they bargained for.

Tony isn't so much introducing Steve to twenty-first century sex as enabling him. Steve already knows what he wants.

Kink meme prompt: Rin has a nightly visitor in his dorm room. They don't notice that Nitori is very much awake on the top bunk of the bed and listening to everything that's going on below him. 'Perhaps he should set up a throwaway email address and anonymously send Rin a link to the Amazon page for the Kama Sutra. Or Sex For Dummies. Or maybe one of those children’s toys with the colorful shaped pegs that fit into matching holes.' Basically, Rin is pretty much the worst roommate ever.

From the Avengers Kink Meme: http://avengerkink.livejournal.com/11065.html?thread=24876857#t24876857 "So Clint is Phil's sub. And he's stubborn and insolent and gets in trouble fairly often. He's always implying that he and Phil are really hardcore, and after a rough patch where he gets punished a lot, his friends start to worry for his safety. In fact, Clint is the gooiest, subbiest sub that ever subbed with Phil, who is incredibly gentle with him and heavy on the pampering and praise. Clint basically lives to be petted and told what a good boy he is, and his punishments are things like timeouts and very light spankings with Phil calmly telling him how disappointed he is in him, which is enough to bring Clint to sobbing contrition. So I guess there's some voyeurism or something, I just want this dynamic and the world at large seeing a radically different one. All the bonus points for some compare/contrast with Pepper and Natasha who are outwardly nearly vanilla when in fact they do crazy edgeplay and heavy pain and just don't tell anyone about it."

Derek maintains this wouldn't be an issue if Stiles would just learn to knock.

Sex gas, Latveria, and a SHIELD orgy.

Troy and Abed move in together on August 15th, but Abed doesn't really get a sense for the pattern until late September.

There's something different about the weight of these eyes. Something that makes Jason sit up and take notice.

kchanlp: NaruSasu + Itachi. Maybe hipster? In which big brother has to teach Sasuke how he should first and foremost close the goddamn door when his goddamn boyfriend is in his room doing goddamn... things.

Tony Stark is all about the advancement of science, but...he probably should have clued Steve in a little sooner. Steve just thinks it's a bad idea to volunteer for anything that involves Reed Richards.

Alec wants something, but he's not sure what it is. Eliot figures it out.

Jack's just taking pictures whenever he sees something worth photographing, something that seems to fit what he's being told in class, about line and shape and color and beauty. It's like the camera knew before Jack did.

"Since you got your powers, you've—" Cisco trails off, waving his hands vaguely. "What?" Cisco raises his eyebrows and waves his hands more pointedly toward his crotch. Barry feels his face heating up. "Cisco!" "I'm asking for science, dude!"

2014: Ice Bucket Challenge. 2015: Wax Off Heart Disease. 2016: mass hysteria.

He’s Dave motherfuckin’ Strider. He saved two—no, three, kind of—universes and has made out with aliens, okay? He has made time his bitch, died for his cause time and time again, and had an ultimate rap off with an Insane Clown Posse wannabe while the fucker was on a murder spree. He doesn’t give two shits what other people think of him.

Tony’s almost at the door of his lab when he hears it. It’s low, throaty; just a split second of a thing. But it’s undoubtedly the sound of Barnes moaning.

For an anon prompt on my Tumblr that I kind of hijacked: gai/obito tho, kakashi's utterly terrified of the two ever coming together. "I've met Gai, Kakashi, and guess what? I'm going /to befriend him/." "You wouldn't DARE, Obito." "Oh, I would. We're going to be best friends." Obito and Gai hit it off instantly, and it all goes downhill from there. Kakashi finds them making out once and it's so horrible. He's never going to get that image out of his mind.

Equius grew tired of the solitude of his workshop and decided to venture out to the castle that appeared in his bubble in search of the company of another. What he found was far from what he could have ever expected.

Why the Beforan equivalent of yourself didn't appear here, you're not sure, though you suspect it has something to do with direct and indirect transference and the extent to which each of you had contact with game code prior to this remix of the universe; the Ancestors from Alternia had vague memories of being their Beforan selves, so both versions re-instanced, but as far as you know you're the only version of Sollux Captor the game was aware of. Poor Sollux, you jeer internally, all alone in the world. If you were to quadrant yourself, you're not sure whether self-hate or self-pity would be the dominant emotion, but either way, you're getting off on it. God, you make yourself sick. You hold your bulge like you're trying to restrain it, but who the fuck are you kidding. It wraps around your fingers, both tendrils snaking and coiling harder the more you try to will them to stop, like don't-think-of-a-trunkbeast, and you rub at them distractedly because you can't stand not to. Sollux Captor, system architect of the new universe, reduced to thinking with his bulge by two copies of his ancestor being obnoxious at each other. Fuck your hot life.

The problem is that you’re at the mercy of a useless, outmoded, ass-backwards mess of a biological process. The drones are gone. They’re never coming again. But your body sure thinks they are. It was— You wouldn’t say it was fine, but it was at least tolerable for a while. Realistically speaking, there was always a reasonable (ninety-nine percent) chance that you’d be culled the first time you tried to supply the drones with a pail, and you’ve been bracing yourself to deal with this since you pupated, for fuck’s sake. It feels like a kick to the shame gloves when your body betrays you and decides, whoops, no, it’s time to be all about filling pails for the glory of the empire.

Damn puberty. Lance blames space. Space puberty. Space puberty is making life super difficult for him--especially since now, he can't STOP looking at Shiro and his buff arms and his great thighs and his great actually everything. [Lance, due to the wonders of Space Puberty, is super into Shiro. Only problem is, he's not exactly sure what else to do besides desperately obsess over how hot their leader is.]

Conner has a very specific fantasy in mind. He wants Tim to watch, and Tim is more than glad to do so.

Wufei is made to watch and wait.

Keith and Shiro play chicken. Sex chicken. Everybody wins. "What do you think you're doing?" "What does it look like I'm doing?" Shiro has an excellent poker face; it doesn't even flicker when he says, "Demonstrating the male version of the human reproductive system. Why are you doing it on my lap?"

Of all the wonderful things to come out of peace talks, Tobirama relishes Izuna's jealousy the most.

This might as well happen, right? Get possessed by an alien parasite, save the world, get fucked by an alien parasite… it’s all in the same vein. It’s not like this is any more fucked up than the rest of it.

“Let’s play a game,” Xingchen says. Song Lan and Xue Yang share a look.

“I still - I don't-” Shiro feels like his brain is broken. “I still don't get why this is necessary.” “All aspects of physical stamina are tested during the trials,” Kolivan replies, standing next to him as both of them watch the screen. “Awakening the blade is only the first step. Your friend is an omega, and all omegas currently serving with the Blades have lasted an hour or more on this device. It is protocol.”

To draw out a likely blackmailer, Sui Zhou and Tang Fan have to manufacture some blackmail material.