Puck’s still got a first time he can give Kurt. At least he can if a) Puck can get him to understand that, b) Puck doesn’t fuck up, and c) if the prissy little shit’ll stop treating Puck like a fucking girl and just take it.

Derek works at a porn store. One day, Stiles comes in asking all sorts of TMI questions about different toys. That's where it all starts.

“It’s like my ad says,” Tang Fan says. “We can talk. Or you can talk, and I can listen, or I can talk to you. About anything. Or … I could talk dirty to you?” Tang Fan does have regulars who want sex stuff, but really, what he does only qualifies as phone sex maybe one call in twenty. Mostly, it’s just Tang Fan chatting with lonely people. But he can handle the sexy stuff, obviously, and if the Man with the Sexy Voice wants sexy, Tang Fan is very willing to — actually, he decides, a little unnerved by his own enthusiasm, better not to finish that thought. This is a business transaction, after all. This is the gig economy. “Not this time,” the Man with the Sexy Voice says, almost apologetic, like he’s forgotten that he’s paying Tang Fan for this. “Just — maybe if you could talk to me about something you find interesting?” In which Tang Fan develops some rather inconvenient feelings for a late-night caller to his phone sex line.

The single faceless, anonymous photograph on the profile that catches his eye is shot in elegant black-and-white, and there’s something about the crispness of the focus and the markedly off-center composition that says art, for once, rather than mugshot. The caption below is equally sparse: “5’6. Demanding.” (Or: Meng Yao gets wrecked by that Good Lan Dick. Lan Xichen gets wrecked by Meng Yao's Whole Deal.)

He doesn’t look up when Baiyi passes. Probably doesn’t even remember him. So what. You don't need a rosebush to remember you, you just enjoy catching sight of it here and there.

Patrick's text says: sometimes all I can think about is rubbing my dick all over your tits. It's not meant for Jonny, but maybe he wishes it were.

Aizawa didn't expect to enjoy HeroCon this year. Especially not being on a panel with All Might -- whose bright idea was that? Meeting Yagi Toshinori changes everything. He's funny. (Oh no.) He's unapologetic. (Oh no.) He's interesting. (Oh shit.)

“So--what’ya say? Make a deal with me?” “Only fools deal with dragons lightly.” “Guess I’m a fool.”