In which young Church ward Gamzee Makara is finally old enough to be officially initiated into the ranks of the subjugglators.

Karkat comes to the Derse Dreamers as a gift. Not under the best of circumstances, but they make the best of it.

Pornstars Derek and Stiles work for the same company. Derek only shoots with werewolves and Stiles only shoots with humans. That's not going to change after they meet. It's really not. (It might.)

The South is a wilderness of warring barbarian 'kings', raiding bands, bandits and other such creatures. Like every good citizen of the Imperium, Dorian Pavus despises the very thought of the place and all those savages who inhabit it, probably all sweaty and half-naked and... sorry, lost his train of thought for a moment there. Of course, most good citizens of the Imperium haven't just been captured by a group of said southern barbarians. (AU in which Hawke leads a raiding band, Dorian is the prize all his men are fighting over, Varric stands to make a lot of money off the betting pool, and Trevelyan is not the Inquisitor, he's a very naughty boy)

At the age of thirty-seven, Dorian of House Pavus could now say that the worst day of his life was his wedding day... After a failed blood-magic ritual from his father, Dorian's body is forever changed. However Halward isn't about to let that get in the way as he offers his only son up as a bargaining chip for peace in Seheron. Dorian, son of one of the most powerful Magisters in the Imperium, is now being forced to marry a Qunari. And to add to the man's frustrations, he must be pregnant within a year.

"Fifty for an hour," Steve tells her. "Sixty for my mouth." Steve sells the only thing he’s got left and Natasha's buying. She’s not the only one.

“Geno? Are you okay? Physically,” Sid asks, which is good, because Zhenya doesn’t think he can put into words how he’s feeling emotionally. He imagines saying, The person I’ve loved for ten years finally took me to bed last night, but it turns out he didn’t want to, and now I can read his mind. No, thank you. “Feel fine,” Zhenya answers. “Even head feel fine.” And suddenly he realizes how fucking odd that is: he was concussed, and the room is brightly lit – he should be hiding under a blanket right now. He narrows his eyes and asks, “Sid, why head feel fine? What happen to concussion?” Sid takes a halting step closer to the bed and says, “Our bond, it’s—it’s a healing bond.” “Holy mother of God,” Zhenya breathes. So. They’re definitely not breaking the bond, then.

Keith stood under the hot spray of the shower head, his eyes closed as he focused inward, trying desperately to regain some sense of composure. He wasn’t quite certain what was wrong with him today; he was the one moving out of sync in their training exercises, he’d run himself into an invisible maze-wall so hard he was dizzy for a quarter hour after it, and he swore he could still feel the static jolt under his skin. When Shiro had touched his shoulder, eyes concerned, his touch was like a fresh electric current and Keith had yanked himself away.

In a world where Omegas far outnumber Alphas, a dowry system is in place. The Omega’s family offers a dowry in order to secure a respectable Alpha match, with the highest dowries netting the “best” Alphas. Aunt May struggles to secure an Alpha for her Omega nephew’s first heat. All her meager savings can afford is a butt-ugly (by his own admission) Alpha without much experience to speak of. Peter would rather go unmated than lose his virginity to a guy that can’t go five seconds without making a Monty Python reference. However, it seems Peter has no choice…

Zoro is a cambion, which means he feeds on sexual energy. A small crew like the Strawhats, its not normally enough to keep a cambion satisfied, but Sanji happens to be an abnormally sexually driven cook so it usually works out okay for Zoro. At least, it works out alright until Sanji finds out that Zoro's been taking energy from him through his dreams. For Sanji, he's trying to wade through the confusing mess of emotions for a certain marimo after a surprise kiss on the battle feild. It's not easy to do on a normal basis. It certainly isn't any easier when the man he has deeper feelings for is a cambion. Then everyone learns how important it is to keep their local cambion fed, for if they don't, someone might get eaten. literally.

Saving people, hunting things: the family business. Modern AU: the Nies are hit by a demon's death curse, which is NOT fuck or die - it's fuck AND die, a kind of reverse cultivation curse that's usually directed against cultivation partners, destroying their golden cores little by little every time they fuck. NOT a clever curse to use against brothers! ...except that the curse comes with a chaser: its targets share blisteringly horny sex dreams every night, as a way of encouraging them to go ahead and give in to the whole fuck-and-die schtick. Awkward. So it makes sense to search for a cure to the curse, right? Especially since the cure might actually help stabilise Mingjue's golden core. Obviously they have no intention of actually boning once they've got rid of the whole fuck-and-die curse... (...for the life of me I can't remember who suggested a Fuck AND Die trope on Twitter many weeks ago - evidently it has been living rent free in the back of my head ever since, though, and so here we have some Niecest.)

Proud Immortal Demon Way's fanfic selection is vast, terrible, and filled with things much worse written than the original work itself, and that's saying something. Shen Yuan was just enough of a masochist to willingly, after another stupid update where Luo Binghe has to papapa another sister for some ludicrous reason that doesn't even make any sense, decide to delve into that lurid cesspool of creative death and unbeta'd pornography far more explicit than anything Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky had ever written. Which is how he finds himself in a fanfic called Proud Immortal Demon's Milky Way.

"Hi, I'm Wei Wuxian. I'm a Career Omega and this is my fourth season on the show. I like spicy food, archery and alphas who are funny. Or maybe I don't, I haven't rolled over for one yet." On-screen, Wei Wuxian winks at the audience laughter. Hot or Knot is the world's most popular reality TV show. Part dating show, part survival show, Hot or Knot is everyone's guilty pleasure - and Wei Wuxian is a fan favourite. - The Love Island/Hunger Games reality dating tv show A/B/O au