It starts with a curse, Jin Guangyao’s last revenge, seeking to tarnish what he could never touch. Lan Xichen is prepared to die from it, if he must, taking the shame of it to his grave. He doesn’t expect his brother’s lover to figure out the situation, let alone that Wei Wuxian might be their best hope of dealing with the curse in a way that leaves all three of them with their self-respect intact. And he certainly doesn’t expect being slowly, carefully drawn into their relationship, and learning how to live again.

the power of dick saves the cultivation world SAY HELLO TO MY DUAL CULTIVATION AGENDA

Saving people, hunting things: the family business. Modern AU: the Nies are hit by a demon's death curse, which is NOT fuck or die - it's fuck AND die, a kind of reverse cultivation curse that's usually directed against cultivation partners, destroying their golden cores little by little every time they fuck. NOT a clever curse to use against brothers! ...except that the curse comes with a chaser: its targets share blisteringly horny sex dreams every night, as a way of encouraging them to go ahead and give in to the whole fuck-and-die schtick. Awkward. So it makes sense to search for a cure to the curse, right? Especially since the cure might actually help stabilise Mingjue's golden core. Obviously they have no intention of actually boning once they've got rid of the whole fuck-and-die curse... (...for the life of me I can't remember who suggested a Fuck AND Die trope on Twitter many weeks ago - evidently it has been living rent free in the back of my head ever since, though, and so here we have some Niecest.)

“Sect Leader Lan,” he said. “Please help me.” Lan Qiren stared down at him in horror, quickly crouching to pull Nie Mingjue up again. “Me? You can’t be serious!” “It has to be you,” Nie Mingjue said. “Sect Leader Lan, please. Please. It can’t be Wen Ruohan. It can’t.”

“You’re going to stay in this cave,” Jiang Cheng says, arms spread wide to block the mouth of it, “or i will beat you until you are physically incapable of leaving it!” Jiang Cheng does, in fact, beat a Liu Qingge weakened by sex pollen. Then he beats... his meat (jk they smash)