"Stiles is Brian, Derek is Dom and Scott is Mia. That's where it gets weird."

"The thing is, Stiles has no interest whatsoever in going on a TV dating show. Deep down, in his heart of hearts - and publicly, to anyone who is foolish enough to bring up the topic - Stiles thinks it's kind of pathetic. Because it's all fake, for starters, like all "reality" TV is fake, but also he thinks the people who go on those shows are more interested in attention than love, so what's the point? It's like narcissistic masturbation with some television exhibitionism thrown in for good measure. And letting the entire nation - nay, the world - mock your lack of pick-up prowess? Noooo thank you."

Derek smirks at her, eyes hooded as he leans closer still, until his lips are brushing her ear. His breath fans hotly over the curve of her neck and Stiles shudders, knuckles going white as she clasps them together between her legs. “Touch yourself,” he whispers, the curve of his lips a shade too wicked.

So Artemis Crock is a princess now, apparently. (A Princess Diaries AU.)