Maybe it's alright to take what you can, when you can. It isn't perfect, it might be wrong, but soon enough you'll end up alone anyway. Series of loosely connected ficlets.

Sakura spends a year in Narnia. Susan watches, and does her best to help.

It’s not like it’s rare at his gigs for someone to sidle up to the booth and go, “Hey! Nice music!”, grinning and interested. "If you’re hitting on me, queue’s on your left," Dave replies, and then he looks.

bkprsn101 (18:16:50):I had, like, five minutes bkprsn101 (18:16:57):and then there was Dave/Naruto Askerian (18:17:04):i’d say i’m sorry but i’d be lying

"Holy crap", the guy says, sprawled on Dave’s bed with arms akimbo. Dave swallows a smirk, and pushes his hand off so he can lay down beside him, side by side. No contact though, they’re both too warm and sweaty.

Ten facts about three Hogwarts students.

When Kakashi first began to see people's souls manifested as animals, he naturally assumed he had lost his mind. (Using HDM themes, but not a true crossover.)

Tobirama comes down to breakfast on the first day of classes to find the Great Hall full of snickering, his husband conspicuously absent, and his brother face-down in his eggs.

"If you're hitting on me, queue's to your left," Dave replies, and then he looks. The man has nice arms. Solid shoulders, strong biceps. Baby face still, baby-blue eyes in the white strobe lights and friendly dimples. Someone got him with funny cat-whiskers paint that's just subtle enough to tickle Dave's funny bone, but with a body like that he's got to be at least twenty. "What, no!" The man blushes so hard Dave can see his face darken even through the flashing lighting and dim of the dance floor. He actually honest-to-God flails his hands, what a dork. "I just -- argh, and you totally know that, don't you?" -- Anonymous asked: Dave/Naruto, hooking up at a house party (papabrostrider is to blame for this one)

“Are you sure I can convince him?” Madara asks dubiously. Hashirama nods. “Only you can convince him,” Hashirama says. Then, solemnly, “Madara, you’re our only hope.”

In which Tobirama is sort of Obi-Wan, Madara is Anakin but not quite, and Obito and Kakashi don’t quite fit the roles of Asajj Ventress and Luke Skywalker but try their best regardless.

Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs and Gryffindors, oh my. (Or, Tobirama has a date. He will probably live to regret it.) Prequel to It’s Witchcraft.

Inuzuri, 78th District of the Rukongai, is dry, featureless, and hot, filled with thieves and murderers. It's probably just about the closest someone can get to Purgatory while still keeping to Soul Society. Fitting, Obito thinks wryly, that this is where he woke up.

For a prompt on my Tumblr: TOS!Sannin. Tsunade McCoy the grumpy, compassionate alcoholic with a heart of gold, Jiraiya Kirk the cocky and intelligent leader and womaniser, and finally, S'chan T'gai Orochimaru, the 'non-emotional' genius scientist with a not-so-hidden soft, gooey emotional centre.

For a prompt from the lovely Holly: The Free! anime featuring Tobirama as a swimmer, with a water addiction like Haruka - and the same penchant for undressing at the first sight of water. Cue Madara blushing and flailing, while Tobirama gives zero shits.

When Gokudera died, taking a bullet for Tsuna, he expected to go to hell. Not wake up as a pink haired girly-boy in a world full of ninja. How's he meant to be the Jyuudaime's right hand in a world that doesn't even have a mafia? Clearly, he'll have to clean this place up before Tsuna gets here. REINCARNATION, Gokudera-as-m!Sakura.

“Kid, this is Kurosaki Ichigo,” Kūkaku says, and there's something crafty in her expression that makes her look far too much like Urahara for comfort. “Ichigo, this is Uchiha Obito, resident ninja.” “Ninja?” Ichigo repeats, dropping the attempt at politeness in favor of incredulity. “You mean like a ninja ninja?”

Maes wakes up in the Elemental Countries after his death, and promptly gets into trouble. Genma gets him out of it.

The irresistible troll vs. the immovable hothead - fight!

Greed is definitely not where he used to be, and the fact that he’s alive was a big clue there. Not like there’s been any research done on what happens to a Homunculus when they die, but Greed had rather been expecting nonexistence. “Well, fuck,” he says, and hopes that Father’s end was as painful as Edward’s imagination could make it.

Takeshi has absolutely no idea what’s going on, but that’s never stopped him before.

Shikamaru squints at him out of one eye. “Omoi,” he says, exasperated. “I'm going to be the first Avatar to ever throw the world out of balance,” Omoi says. “I'm going to cause—” “—me to go prematurely bald,” Shikamaru interrupts, and reaches up to grab his wrist, dragging him down onto the blanket next to him.

Kakashi has a lot of work ahead of him if he wants Tsuna to survive, but at least the company is agreeable. And cute.

“What is that?” Tobirama demands incredulously. “Your way out of this system,” Kushina says cheerfully, and Tobirama suddenly understands far better why she’s hanging on his arm like she’s going to physically pin him in place.

“There you go,” the voice says, and the hand on Omoi's shoulder loosens. “Okay, how’s the rest?” “Awful,” Omoi mutters, but he drops his hand, lets his eyes slide further open. “I'm going to be the first Sentinel to zone out on dewdrops and then B will be so ashamed of me he’ll shave his head and move to Kusa.”

Edward, Tobirama, some accidental dimension travel, and questions of methodology. Plus snark.

Obito turns himself into the Whomping Willow. It goes great, right up until people start making a nuisance of themselves under his roots.

Obito glances over Sakura, sprawled out on the couch painting her nails, and raises a brow. “I thought Kakashi told you to leave?” “Ha.” Sakura checks her nails, then starts applying another coat. “He has like three hundred sports channels. I'm not moving an inch.”

A what if, of a what if... What if the Vongola Tenth Generation were to be raised by Uchiha Madara and Senju Tobirama? Well, for one thing they don't even bother with pretending to be nice people. For another, Madara is born into the Hibari family. Yes. Madara. Also yes. Those Hibari.

Shūhei is in the middle of trying to figure out how to tell his captain we don’t do things that way anymore because that system is outdated and also wrong when the whole world lurches under his feet.

Twenty is probably too young to die, even for a shinobi, but if anyone can kill Sakura with sheer attractiveness, it's Kori.

The Akatsuki are hired to separate a certain prince from a certain homonculus. It doesn't go quite as planned for anyone involved.

Obito meets a version of himself from another world. And another, and another, and another.

“There’s a Lantern out here?” Hal asks incredulously.

“Why does the paper say you're dating?” Dick asks, waving the Sunday edition in Bruce's face. Bruce doesn’t let his expression so much as twitch. Dick can sense blood in the water the same way a shark can, and he knows Bruce far too well. “Does it?” he asks mildly.

Jason wrestles the crazy, half-feral ninja to the ground ten blocks from the building he blew up with magic, which means it’s probably a Thursday in Gotham.