Listening to his dad play when he thinks Dylan is asleep makes Dylan kind of sad and worried. His dad is good, that’s what everyone says. But no one ever gets discovered in Arkansas. Alfie says even Baltimore is better if you want to be famous, but he still thinks that city kind of stinks, so he doesn’t recommend it to Dylan. He says they need to move to Los Angeles. That’s where all the famous people live. And Alfie has an Aunt Madeleine there, and he can totally come and visit sometimes. Dylan doesn’t have his own computer, but his dad lets him use the one in the living room. He even has his own account there, with his very own user picture (Batman) and password (robinsux). So he already looked Los Angeles up, and he’s pretty sure Alfie is right about this. Because Los Angeles is where Adam Lambert lives, and if his dad is ever going to make an album and give concerts and stuff, Adam Lambert is the guy to help.

"What's with the dress?"

"It's your bachelor party, and you're making tea!"

One-night stands are not for everyone.

One-night stands are not for everyone.

That's not how fate works.