“He thinks I have stigmata,” Frank said, because what the fucking hell, it couldn’t get any worse. He might as well just lay it out. “Oh, well,” said Brian into his hands. “Of course.”

"not!fic about Gerard the teenage failboat superhero: a Kick-Ass AU. Once upon a time, there was a group of teenage comic nerds, who were invisible to girls and sometimes got beaten up by the bigger kids. One of them had a thing about saving people, became a masked vigilante and got involved with an Italian mobster's son, and it all went downhill from there."

Gerard's fat fucking birds have fat fucking asses.

"Exactly what the title sounds like: a My Chemical Romance not!fic, featuring Frank Iero as the Prince of New Jersey's thriving Vending Machine Business."

After getting expelled from Queen of Peace, Frank realizes that this could be the best thing to ever happen to him and formulates a plan. A plan to use his new life at his new school as an opportunity to cross-dress, full-time as the boy he knows he is, unbeknownst to the students and administration of Belleville High School.

Set in 2006. "Smokes," Mikey reads aloud. "Likes dogs in case ever get one. Likes rock music. Likes loud rock music. Is interesting. Does not hog bathroom." He looks at Frank over the top of his glasses. "Dude, it's like you're meant to be."

Totally, of course. A sex alien named Gerard dropped out of the sky to watch him jerk off. No way is his brain making this shit up.