Sid is smitten. He was smitten from the start, he thinks. The first time he saw Zhenya's dark eyes and hair and smooth skin. The way his cheeks flush the same color as his mouth with exertion, or passion. Sid knows that people make comments about his own mouth, the way it would be more suited on a childbearing male, but he thinks that they can’t possibly have seen Zhenya's. The perfect, sweet cupid's bow of his upper lip and the plush, fat pout of the bottom one.

Sid peers down at the human who was shoved at him – a young man, as far as he can judge. “What is going on?!” Sid asks, feeling as unmoored as a dragon ever can. The human looks nearly as confused as Sid does. “Uh, you heard the village headman,” he says tentatively. “The crops are… bad. Worse every year. We know you protect the valley, so we figured you must be mad at us if you were letting the crops fail.” “I protect the valley from things I can bite,” Sid huffs, still thoroughly confused. “I don’t know what you expect me to do about… blight, or insects, or poor crop rotation."

“Sid, need you to pay attention to me,” Alex says firmly. “You have bond crisis. You sick, Sid. Very sick. Need somebody to touch you to stop you being sick.” “I didn’t know you could get sick from being lonely,” Crosby mumbles. Zhenya makes a noise that sounds like he’s been punched. “I guess it makes sense, though.”

And then Furiosa has a Citadel. Not just a Citadel, but all the people inside it - the Wretched, the War Boys, the Milk Mothers, the Wives, the two remaining Vuvalini… and Immortan Joe's men. That last group are first in her thoughts. The threat there is most obvious.

“What kind of pleasure do you want to offer the Lover?” Sid asks. People usually want sex, of course, but not always – Sid’s had supplicants who just wanted to make out, or cuddle, or flirt… and one memorable supplicant who wanted to give him a massage, which was awesome. She confessed to Sid afterward that she’d gone in intending to have sex, but “when I saw those muscles, I was like, damn, I need to get my hands all over that!”

Zhenya checks everything one last time: the artificial slick goes in the pocket of his jeans, and yes, the bottle of wine for Sid’s collection is nestled in a wood box in the back seat. He’d actually gone out and bought cream cheese to make a cheesecake on autopilot before he’d remembered – food is an alpha’s courting-gift, not an omega's. He'd thrown the cream cheese out, and bought the wine the next day.

There are six new bug reports in Jira since Sid checked last night at 10PM. An open-plan workroom over, Richie is giving the coworking space tour to the new guy. "There's Flower from NetProfit… and there's Sidney Crosby," Richie says. "He's with Penng now, but he was at Facebook early." "Facebook, wow," says the new guy. Sid resists the urge to climb under his own desk.

She puts the number into her phone as Phil's friend. Phil has a lot of friends, more than Amanda knows. For all that the media shits on him, he's easy to like away from the camera. He's always meeting up with old buddies during the summer to shoot the shit and grill out in someone's backyard. This guy could be anybody, really, except for Bozie, because Amanda already has Bozie's number in her phone.

It's not like Phil goes around telling people that his old team bought him his best friend like some people buy hookers. He can't really talk about it with Bozie, either, because Bozie will just say something like, "Come on, I provide the full girlfriend experience," which is so much worse than actually being offended.

Sid already has a stand mixer, a $400 blender, and one of the nice waffle makers you can flip with the handle, the kind they have at waffle bars in hotels. Geno has two magnetic racks of chef knives. Do they really need a wedding registry? Do they really need a registry at Williams-Sonoma?

Kissing and dentata.

Over the years, Mario has become accustomed to Sidney's many idiosyncrasies, but he has to admit the spontaneous de-aging is a bit unexpected.

Sid and Tyler come together at Worlds to win gold, commiserate about falling for unattainable teammates, and comfort each other with their dicks. However, when they come home those teammates might not be as unattainable as they thought and are getting the wrong idea.

Jonny's not expecting his heat to come on so suddenly. And he's definitely not expecting to be in a broken elevator when it does.

It’s been decades since a Switch was of enough importance and interest to society to be documented so no one cares much anymore. But also, no one really knows how to handle it. All the doctors he’s ever been to just caution him to be careful as he grows and learns.

Dylan squeezes Jack’s arm. Jack opens his eyes again, not even realising he’d let them slip shut. “We’re saying you should call us when your heat hits.”

“You’re an investment,” Pat had told Sid over and over. “You’re a talent, and we’re not letting the league freeze you out for this.” The NHL demands omegas be bonded to play. Sid, unwilling to lose hockey, agrees to enter into a bond with the Penguins' draft prospect Evgeni Malkin. It does not go as they planned.

Wilson and Latta and an omega in heat.

Connor won't be able to go back from knowing the way this sounds. He'll remember all the whines and groans that Dylan made, how desperate he felt. Connor wonders what tomorrow is going to be like, for all of them. For Dylan, maybe, especially.

Connor honestly doesn’t mean to snoop.

Zhenya rode the Pens charter plane with the rest of the media crew: Michelle and Sam and the ROOT team. He went to bed too late and woke up way too fucking early. “Good thing you’re behind the camera instead of in front of it,” Michelle said one morning. She had a donut from the continental breakfast. Zhenya had two. “You look like me, too, if you don’t have all that makeup,” Zhenya told her crankily.

There was a kid in Geno's yard.

“Sidney, what did you do?” Gonch sounded a little upset himself. Sidney goes to pick Geno up for breakfast before they go to watch practice and finds a tiny, curly-headed Geno who can't speak any English and doesn't know who Sidney is instead. Luckily everyone Sid knows is completely helpful and supportive of his attempts to keep Geno happy until he gets back to normal. Right. (Sid needs better friends).

Crosby’s Biggest Secret! For years, Crosby has been famously quiet about his personal life. But now sources close to Crosby have confirmed that the secretive star has been keeping an even bigger secret than we thought! Meet the heir to his hockey throne—a son! Geno almost drops his phone.

It was hot, and Sid felt kind of weird about thinking it was hot. This guy was screwing himself on camera for money. That wasn’t really Sid’s scene. He closed the browser window. Fine for other people, but not his thing.

Patrick is in heat.

Flower is looking out at the balcony, and he’s got a wrinkle of concern between his eyebrows. “Are you on your pills, Sid?” “Bud. I’ve been on the pills since I was twenty years old, of course I am. Also, still really, really single.” “Maybe,” Flower says slowly. “Maybe you should have been upping your doses.” “What—” Sid says, before following Flower’s gaze to the balcony. And his heart stops.

The only place he doesn’t feel alone is the moment after a goal at home. The rest of the time, all Zhenya can seem to feel is the ways he’s disconnected from everything else, English a yammering cadence he fishes scraps of meaning from like an exhausted prospector. I’m smart in Russian, he wants to tell them. I’m funny, in Russian. I’m all kinds of things.

The new second officer is cute, alright? Geno can’t be blamed for taking one look at him across the crew’s mess, and deciding then and there that he was going to get to know Commander Crosby.

King Evgeni has a problem. A very, very big problem, because the new guardsman from the Outer Islands is driving him to absolute distraction.

Magnitogorsk doesn’t hold much for him. He stares down the barrel of his future there: toiling away at a factory job, living and dying streets away from where he was born. He rubs the water-smoothed stone in his pocket, and thinks of the thunder of the waves. He knows that staying here will kill some essential part of himself. And so, he leaves. For PatriciaKoiFish, I hope very much that you like it :)

It hits Sid first, because of course it does. He’d been talking with Phil, discussing their first power play unit, when he gets distracted by Geno’s ass in spandex. “I don’t know why everyone’s always going on and on about my ass, when you’re around. Fuck, man. It’s fucking incredible.” “Whose ass, now?” Tanger shrieks gleefully and Sid realizes with a dawning horror that— “Did I say that… out loud?”

When he takes the checker job, Zhenya doesn’t do much thinking about where the Giant Eagle he works at is located. What really drives it home is looking up from the quinoa, brussels sprouts, salmon, and box of Captain Crunch cereal on his belt late one night straight into the eyes of Sidney Fucking Crosby. For malkinmecrazy. Inspired by all the random fan photos of Sid in grocery stores.

This is not the Sidney he has come to know. This is the lord of the underworld, in his robes of office, heavy, rich, pitch black as night save the ornate embroideries of gold at the hems. There’s a diadem of onyx on his brow, flashing in the light, pointed shards of stone that make Sidney’s face underneath them look all the more stern and alien. Geno shivers. Anonymous asked: Mythology AU pls? Light angst in one scene (child’s death alluded to, not mentioned or described at all)

Sidney is late making his Soulgift. Anonymous asked: Soulbond AU for Sid and G please?

Sid knows, okay. He’s known since he was 13 what he was and wasn’t going to be able to have. Anonymous asked: lonely, touch-starved sid au

The hydrophones have been picking up nonsense for the past three days and Zhenya has had it up to here, honestly.

It had started at a promotional event for the Pens at a sporting goods store. A little boy with bright eyes had handed his new skates over to be autographed and said, very politely, “Will you please sign it? It’ll be super lucky if you do, and I can skate really fast and score a bunch of goals like you.”

Alex Ovechkin talks dirty to Sidney Crosby, and then gives Zhenya some much-needed advice. Because he’s a nice guy like that.

The first time he catches Malkin’s scent after he makes his way to the United States at last, Sid's almost bowled over by it.

“So I’ve noticed something,” Sid says, and Zhenya makes a face. Sid is using his Serious Captain Voice and he is using Personal Discussion Introductory Phrase No. 3. Fuck’s sake.

Geno ends up with red, white and blue hair after the Caps game, so he’s the first person sent to the new cursebreaker when they make it back to Pittsburgh. Sid is in the lounge when Geno comes back out. “I’m know her,” Geno says despondently. “She’s cursebreaker on staff for media at Sochi.”

Magnitogorsk is a city of iron, and so is Metallurg’s will. They will not be thwarted, they do not let go of what is theirs. So when one of their own, born, bred, and molded, tries to run? To spit in the face of all that they’ve given him? Metallurg does not give up what it owns.

The entire building is decked out for Christmas. Sparkling lights, the rich, glowing reds and greens of masses and masses of poinsettia flowers. It’s not hard to realize what’s going on. It feels like every titled, unmarried man between the ages of 20 and 40 who likes other men is here. Unbelievable. They’re marrying the King off with a fucking Cinderella-style ball.

“They asked me, today, in an interview with Sid right next to me, about that thing I said last year. About leaving the Penguins, being a big star somewhere else.” “And you’re, what? Afraid he’s going to be angry with you?” Zhenya squirms. He feels hot and prickly, his emotions a soupy mess he can’t grasp in order to make sense of. “I think… I think I’m afraid he won’t be.”

They make a point of it, always, telling Zhenya how beautiful Sidney is.

Zhenya is re-looping the hair elastic around Alina's braid when he becomes aware there’s someone standing in the doorway. He glances up, and his hands freeze in place. Sidney fucking Crosby is standing there, looking hesitant, with a half-empty water bottle dangling from one hand.

RainyForecast)

Geno only lets Alex make him a Grindr profile that summer because Alex is still upset about Maria, because Alex's grin has a kind of manic, brittle quality that makes Geno sigh and hand over his cell phone with only a token protest.

Of all the new things going on this season, Sidney Crosby wearing panties before and after a game is not something Geno could’ve anticipated. And being interested in Sidney Crosby wearing panties before and after a game is not something he could’ve prepared himself for.