John is far too open about his exclusive interest in females, and Equius takes offense. Sweaty offense.

The kids and remaining trolls stop by Jane Crocker's house to meet up with the new players and end up getting more than they bargained for when she realizes how much they could use some time to recuperate.

For PB&J: Take one part well-aged longing, one part awkwardness, two parts enthusiasm, and a dash of possessiveness. Mix well. Season to taste with the presence of a crabby moirail in the next block. Part of Miracle Child 'verse

Things you are capable of doing that nobody knows about: * An acrobatic fucking pirouette off the handle, and not out of rage. * flipping yourself, not just your shit. * pas de poisson. aka The Fic Where Karkat Does Combat Via Ballet (with the work-inspiring art by elanorpam).

AO3 port of Brainbent, a reader-driven Homestuck AU on Tumblr. Warning for mental illness themes. Major updating in progress as I move the story posts here from Tumblr for an easier archive bingeing experience.

Wherein the four beta!kids are and always were trolls on Alternia, Sgrub/Sburb does not exist, and Troll Jade Harley is on a quest to keep her friend Aradia from dying. Things will almost certainly get more complicated, but that's a good place to start.

John beats a thunderstorm home, Rose has melted all over the bathroom, and they make do despite the absence of their other two pieces.

In which Natasha gives the thumbs-up to Tony Stark and the Iron Man suit, the Avengers Initiative starts a little differently, and Tony finds himself spending a lot of time with assassins and/or spies.

In which Cap makes new friends, becomes an accidental Internet troll, swaps a lot of stories, and gives Bucky Barnes a hug.

Bruce isn't sure he wants to use a credit card Tony gave him. Steve isn't sure he even knows how.

There are some staff changes going on at SHIELD.

The alternate title to this story is, ‘How Pepper Got Her Groove Back (Not That She Ever Lost It To Begin With): A Story in Cocktails’: In which Pepper rules Stark Industries with an iron first in between drink breaks, there is way higher than Level Seven clearance at SHIELD but Phil trusts her with a lot more than that, and the Avengers really have no idea how much work has to be done to keep them afloat when it doesn't directly involve explosions.

In which xeno/inflation/mpreg/egg-laying is taken entirely too seriously, compulsive world building is showcased, and I pretend really hard that Gamzee might ever be a sympathetic character again. Originally found at: http://homesmut.dreamwidth.org/8447.html?thread=39867903

Steve had body-modesty trained out of him in boot camp, and apparently his attitude is infectious.

Being an adult is hard, it is hard and no one understands. Particularly when your only child starts polyamorously dating aliens.

Dave doesn't always understand the nature of troll romance, but most of the time he doesn't need to.

Tony begins to notice that things are going missing from his workshop... and discovers that his bots have been hiding a very, very big secret from him. Or rather, a very, very small one. In which Dummy is a kleptomaniac, You is painfully shy, Butterfingers is a programming genius, JARVIS is a sarcastic sonofabitch, Pepper takes care of Tony outside of the workshop, Bruce is Tony's boo, Thor is Tony's favourite, Clint is actually kind of smart, Steve has terrible timing, and problem-solving is never simple or easy.

Stiles is in the sparse woods on the slope beside Beacon Hills Cemetery, which wasn’t where Scott said he’d be at all, which is why it takes Derek an hour and a half to find him by following the grease-boy-whiskey scent of the Jeep’s meandering path.

Gyzym's not!fics are addictive, I swear. So here are four more, kinda-sorta in the Bedtime Stories 'verse, but this time with bonus Teen Wolf! The titles are pretty self-explanatory, the links are to the texts on gyzym's tumblr, and I haven't linked to their individual downloads because that made the page really confusing - the files are clearly labelled, so if you don't want one, you can just delete it from the group folder.

Come Now, We're Children (Let's Play A Game): He has no idea what you're supposed to say when you find one of your...werewolf acquaintances, completely out of their mind, growling like they're about to see what your insides taste like. There's no handbook for this. Stiles is thinking that if he survives he might write one. Totally Not A Meet-Cute: "Gerard has had a crush on Train Guy for a while, but just going up and talking to him would be weird. He needs a reason, right?" In the Belly Of: "Because space whales…fish…are a thing. In multiple universes. (Look, Todd asked and I said Okay, and this is what happened. I don’t know either.)" Turn Your Head: "Written for the genderplay square at kink_bingo's April 2012 "gift baskets" challenge." Apple Bottom Jeans (And Other Love Songs): "Or, how Steve Rogers--kind of--learns to dance."

Choices: "Sylar's on a quest for powers, but Gerard just wants to help." You Know These Words (Like an Old Country Song): "Movieverse. The one where Clint Barton used to be a Hunter. A crossover of sorts with Supernatural." Spin and Rinse: "Set in the early van days, Brian forces the boys to stop at a laundromat."

The dark powers have some... particularly interesting applications.

When Derek finally realizes that there's nothing left for him in Beacon Hills, he goes back to New York, gets a life, falls in love and finds his home. (A podfic/fanfic collaboration)

Kink meme fill. Stiles knows he isn't attractive to gay guys or straight girls. He decides to check in with Derek on the straight dudes thing. Scott wants it known that his only problem with this is that he had to be there to hear it.

Sollux Captor is 22 years old, a successful freelance web designer, and an avid player of the wildly successful MMORPG, Grubquest. Karkat Vantas is 19 years old, a cranky CS-major freshman, and an avid player of the wildly successful MMORPG, Grubquest. Sollux and Karkat are the worst best friends and one of the top player-pairs in the game. In a month, they're meeting for the first time and it's exciting... and terrifying.

You get culled.

Episodes From the Lives of Twelve Trolls From Various Castes From Low to the Very Highest (and One Pariah Who Fell Out the Bottom of the Spectrum) Who Band Together to Challenge the Rule of Her Imperial Condescension. Featuring Romances in All Four Quadrants, Heretical Philosophies, a Dangerous Amount of Revolutionary Fervor, Regicide, Ancestor Worship and More to be Added Later.

Terezi Pyrope is a Neophyte Legislacerator looking to lease an administrative assistant. She was not expecting to find Dave Strider, a secretarial asset with a sense of integrity as strong as her own. Dave Strider is a secretarial asset with "personality problems" that would have gotten him culled if not for his otherwise exemplary administrative abilities. He finds himself drawn into the quadrants of the would-be social reformer who leased him. He finds he is surprisingly Okay with this. Both their lives become interesting (in the curse sense) when the Heiress retains Pyrope and her team.

He could gag himself with how deep in this he is. In which Dave and Terezi share in sweet interspecies lovemaking and realize that being born universes apart lends itself to some discrepancy in the biological department.

Because Loki is a contrary asshole, he gifts Clint Barton with wings, of all things, during battle. The wings in and of themselves are one thing, but the way they react to Phil is another.

In which young Church ward Gamzee Makara is finally old enough to be officially initiated into the ranks of the subjugglators.

Your wriggling day is in three days, and while you normally celebrate this event with the apathy it deserves, this particular sweep is different. That’s because it will be your eighth sweep, and it happens to coincide with the arrival of the imperial drones. This is a milestone that every troll looks forward to with a heady combination of excitement and terror. For most trolls, when they reach their eighth sweep, they become adults. Not you. When you reach your eighth sweep, you will die.

When a second Tony Stark slips through from an alternate universe, Steve suddenly finds his hands very full.

Stiles learns that even with werewolves, giant lizards and psychopathic hunters on the loose, life can still find other ways to screw with you. Case in point: everyone keeps assuming he and Derek are a couple. What the hell?

“Okay,” he says, “Do it again.” “—————,” replies Karkat.

When demons are involved things are always bad, so when someone sabotages the protections on the rink for a charity gala things go downhill fast, but when Johnny saves Evan from a fate worse than death the balance completely changes.

Voldemort has captured Harry and for his own twisted reasons has chosen not to kill him outright. Revenge in the Dark Lord's mind requires a fate worse than death and Harry is about to find out what that is.

THEN: Dave shacked up with a Crossroads Demon, sold his soul, brought Rose along for the ride, and they killed a hipster water demon. NOW: Roadtrip. The worst roadtrip.

In a discarded reality, a clown once made a promise to a poet. But trapped in the Veil with a vicious subjugglator, his life rewritten and his team falling apart, can Karkat Vantas find his way along a path marked by dreams he can never remember?

In an alternate universe where the kids came from a world with daemons, what's different? And what's the same?

Tony's life is almost perfect. He lives in a converted warehouse full of friends (and one frenemy), has a job that leaves him plenty of time to think about other things and a regular Friday night campaign. If his best friend, Steve Rogers, hadn't moved away to New York and left him behind, then perfection would've been achieved. Tony can roll with the punches though and he's almost all the way over that little bump in the road (shut up Bruce, he totally is) when Steve moves back, looking taller and broader and more confident than ever and Tony's left with a converted warehouse full of friends (and one frenemy), a job that leaves him plenty of time to think about other things, a regular Friday night campaign and the uncomfortable realization that maybe he's in love with his best friend and has been since he was sixteen.

The first month after he wakes up on the meteor, WV spends most of his time alone.

*wife *actnion *actino *action Roxy and Tavros roleplay as husband and wife. It goes about as well as you'd expect. Written for the kink meme!

He's always hidden it. Them.

There's a pattern Sheriff Stilinski just can't ignore.

“I think Bond’s trying to be your friend,” Eve tells him. “…well,” Q says slowly, “this is a new and disturbing development.”

Karkat introduces Dave to some of his quality literature; Dave is more ok with this than he expected to be.

It was so much easier to be celibate when you were dead.

What if the universes collided and a bunch of Steves ran into each other. And for whatever reason, they all had sex. As one does when meeting several of your alternate universe versions.

"Once there were two hockey players. One had great hair. One had a lot of brothers. This is their story." Or, Kris Letang gets a hug and Marc Staal meets a nice boy. Inspired by Morning to Wake You