It was supposed to be just an assignment. Falling for the person she was supposed to protect wasn’t really in the plan. But when do plans ever stay the same?

Where Darcy gets a day job.

From a prompt on Avengerkink. Thanks to a magical spell by invading aliens from another realm, Tony Stark becomes a woman...for three months. Obviously there's no way he's not going to take his new body for a test drive. And who better to help him with it that our very own Captain America, Steve Rogers, the straighter-than-a-ruler guy he's been falling in love with totally against his will and who's finally noticing him now...

Clint moves into Avengers Tower, and promptly takes up residence in the air ducts, including the one above Bruce's lab. It soon becomes clear that this isn't just a cracky, quirky behavior.

“If you don't turn your life into a story, you just become a part of someone else's story.” -The Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents, by Terry Pratchett In which Darcy Lewis works for SHIELD, dates Spider-man and his issues, is roommates with Jessica Jones and her issues, befriends the Avengers she hasn't met yet, and generally manipulates the situation around her to better suit her expectations. Because that's how she rolls.

Clint is really bad at being single. Fury hands Coulson a mission: Find Clint Barton a boyfriend.

"Why is Bruce Banner still in New York?" Fury asks, in a tone that suggests he is barely managing to exercise patience.

Excitement is the last thing to cross Bruce’s mind when the teacher announces there will be a partner project and the teacher is picking the partners, thank you very much because everyone would pick their friends and no one would expand their minds at all. Bruce doesn’t know a single person in this class and he is extremely self conscious about being the only sophomore in the class. And then the teacher says “Bruce Banner and Tony Stark” and Bruce’s heart constricts. Tony lazily turns his head and figures out who he is based on the fact that he’s the only person in the room he doesn’t know. Tony saunters across the room and slides into the seat in front of him. “Are you some kind of nerd?” Tony asks him. “You’re not a junior because I know all of them so you must be a sophomore or something."

"It's a great idea," Tony said. "Fabulous," Pepper said. "I'll file it with all your other recent great ideas, like stealing cars from the Stark Formula One team and buying me a strawberry farm for my birthday."

After the events of The Avengers movie, Bruce Banner moves into the new Stark-Potts tower in downtown Manhattan. Then things take a turn for the sexy/awesome/kinky. Tony/Pepper/Bruce. Not exactly PWP, but very smut-heavy as it goes along.

Steve bit his lip, staring at the floor. Here they were, two grown men both in their pajamas, looking at a box of a friend’s sex toys in a closet in the middle of the night.

Still getting used to the twenty-first century, Steve comforts himself with memories of long-gone friends. But Howard Stark, the man Steve remembers, is nothing like the man he sees in the newsreels.

The villain of the week pours acid onto Tony Stark's eyeballs. Life proceeds.

It's Darcy's first day as Tony Stark's new personal assistant. Only one thing in her closet suits this occasion.

Sometimes, you really can go home again.

So here I am again, more fan art for another one of astolat's amazing story's. This one is Loki with Thor at his mercy!

Bizarre alien peace rituals, drunken debacles, Jim Kirk's pornography, the phrase 'bet your sweet ass' taken way too literally, bar fights, everyone's favorite Orion and super advanced sex toys of the future you wish you had now. A love story.

Antonia Carter Stark takes no shit and no prisoners.

It's not all bad when Jim and Leonard awake in a strange room containing a large pool of water - until the tentacles start appearing.

Gerard was only thirteen when his mom dumped him and his brother off at the local group home. His mom was under the delusion that if she placed them with a foster care system, then they would go to a family that would actually be able to care for them. Yeah, it wasn’t the brightest plan. He felt like an idiot, because he felt like he was too old for this place. Surely, they would find him a place to be with Mikey. But it didn’t work out that way. Four years passed and even though people thought about adopting them, they never did. Gerard made sure of it, if only because it was the only way he would never be separated from Mikey. He knew why his mom didn’t want them. It was because she hadn’t known that she was having sex with a werewolf until her oldest son had shifted for the first time. After that, it had been a downward spiral of fights between his mom and dad, his dad walking out, and then his mom deciding that she didn’t even want her own kids, based solely on the fact that they were werewolves.

A world in which werewolves and magic thrive within the shadows of modern society. The night of his party, Dom is attacked by a werewolf. Colin finds himself coming to Dom's defense in a fight that results in Colin killing the werewolf. Mortally wounded, Colin tries to save his friend by any means necessary—including embracing Dom as his cub. However, Colin quickly discovers something is drastically wrong. Dom’s been marked by an older alpha, one with magical powers. It’s a race against time as Colin’s Alpha and several of the fellowship are drawn to save Dom. Secrets are uncovered, and they find themselves in a standoff with another pack—one that wants revenge against the one who killed their brother and pack member.

Karkat and Gamzee cuddle on the meteor road trip to nowhere.

You are watching Dave Strider make out with himself, and now you understand why people stand on the beach and take pictures of an oncoming tsunami instead of running for high ground. You physically cannot look away from this, let alone leave.

After three years out of contact, John and Karkat can finally talk again. The conversation doesn't go quite the way they were expecting. Now the three weeks it will take the golden ship to match velocities with the asteroid seem like three million. Why are the laws of physics so unkind to desperate teenaged boys? [an antidote to sadstuck! if this is not the fluffiest, most sentimental xenoporn ever written, i will eat my writekind specibus.]

Karkat has been acting strange lately -- calm, unflappable, and sometimes even smiling dreamily at nothing -- and while it's something of a respite from his usual yelling, it's gone on long enough the others are concerned. They make vague plans to find out just what the hell is going on, but John, as the only person who can still get under Karkat's skin, decides on a direct approach... and discovers some very interesting things indeed about his favorite shouty troll and his unnerving moirail.

'There was only one thing worse than Dave Strider's smug motherfucker act, and it was his smug motherfucker act after he'd won a bet.' In which Karkat has lost a bet to Dave and turns paying up into payback.

IT HAS RECENTLY COME TO MY ATTENTION THAT INTERSPECIES RELATIONS ARE RAPIDLY DEVOLVING INTO SLOPPY MAKEOUTS THAT THREATEN TO BECOME DISGUSTINGLY MORE INTIMATE. IN AN EFFORT TO KEEP YOU IDIOTS FROM FREAKING THE FUCK OUT OVER WEIRD XENOBIOLOGY AND EMBARRASSING EVERYONE IN THE WORST WAYS POSSIBLE, I HAVE COMPILED THIS GUIDE, WHICH SHOULD BE SHORT ENOUGH THAT EVEN THOSE OF YOU WITH THE ATTENTION SPANS OF SMALL INSECTS SHOULD BE ABLE TO READ IT ALL IN ONE SITTING.

Your moirail is something of a shambling disaster -- his hair is a tangled, frizzy mess, his clothes are tattered at the hems and grimy, and he could stand a wash or five himself. But it isn't, you've realized, that Gamzee doesn't want to care for himself, it's more that he doesn't know how to take care of himself well. You're not sure why, since he had access to the same schoolfeeding as everyone else, but maybe it was because he was alone too much for so long. Maybe it's hard to care, or know to care, when there's no one to fuss over you.

You're still Dave Strider, and you're pretty sure a certain troll is burning up your lifetime supply of chill. Dave has convinced himself that the thing he has with Karkat is about lust and only lust -- yet when the curiosity of his his closest friends forces him to examine it in more detail, he's acutely uncomfortable with what he finds. --- Sequel to Lousy Stupid Goddamned Pretty Troll Boy.

John introduces his best human friend to his best troll friend. Maybe the three of them sit down to watch romcoms, maybe they're just hanging around a lab in the veil, but whatever the circumstance, Dave has trouble paying attention to the conversation at hand. Karkat is good looking and distracting and it's just not fair. Naturally, he begins distracting Karkat while John's talking. Little touches, lip licks, etc. Karkat gets flustered, Dave is thrilled, John is oblivious. It turns into a competition to see who can flirt the most without alerting John to their UST-fueled game.

EB: WHEN I SAID OKAY FINE JADE LET'S TRY TO **DISCREETLY** PUT OUT FEELERS I DIDN'T MEAN GO RIGHT UP TO HIM AND ASK HIM POINT BLANK IF HE'D LIKE TO STAR IN HIS OWN KINKTASTIC ALIEN PORNO!!!!!!!! GG: >:/ oh yes because "btw do you have a gf" totally means "hey do you wanna be the yummy filling in a twin sandwich" in normal people land. dont be a buttface, john!! >:( Sequel to Adventures in Collaborative Storytelling.

-- gardenGnostic [GG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 23:45 -- GG: hey john, i thought you were going to bed early! EB: nd she kissed him full on the mouth with lots of to EB: GAH GG: :O ??? EB: damn it jade, you and your ninja windows! pretend you didn't see anything okay.

Dave has a thing for large breasts. Jade discovers she does too.

The thing about Karkat Vantas is, he might be a pompous, noisy windbag with an inflated opinion of his own importance, and if he was suddenly struck down by some kind of vicious troll laryngitis the universe's total amount of chill and quiet would suddenly go up three levels... But turns out he's also a great fuck.

What do you do with your own cadaver? Not to mention the bodies of your friends and guardians? A story of the first days traveling the yellow yard.

He's not cute anymore, is the thing. He's not small and scrawny and bug-eyed with shock, standing there like a tool as a water-holding device plummets down to become his new hat. He's… He's… Prowly.

There are certain expectations in troll society about taking in a freeloader with no place to go, as Dad Egbert finds out when he offers to host two of his son's stranded friends post-game.

AU. In the aftermath of October 31st, 1981, Severus Snape, Remus Lupin, and Sirius Black try to set their differences aside to keep Harry safe.

The tale of Thor, Loki, a magical horse, and abandoning youth in favor of wisdom. Or the story of how Loki gave birth to Sleipnir and how Thor learned how to be king.

The future may be different, with electric lights and telegrams, but the world still needs the Avatar. The Avengers set in the world of Avatar: The Last Airbender. I really can't be more direct than that.

There was always a chance the mission would go wrong.

such_heights prompted me with "some combination of Natasha, Pepper, and Maria, weapons training." This is what happened.

Making a dick joke was a strategic error. You put the subject on the metaphorical table. You're now thinking about troll dick.

Everyone has a part of themselves that others don't always get to see.

This is not happening. He's not chained up in the back of a van driving through the desert to fucking Arkansas of all places. He definitely hasn't been kidnapped by some tiny adorable dude with a gun babbling about how Adam is his mate. And there is no way in hell he's a werewolf. Except for how the first two things are very clearly true, and he's starting to worry about the third.

"The first watch keeps the correct time. Always. Terezi tried starting out of sync the third time they played this game, but without that one thread of the right beat to cling to, the grating wrongness of the other watches knocked Dave out of the mood long before he could hit trance state." Terezi/Dave, idiosycratic forms of bondage.

Prompt: Let's have a thing where going God Tier has made the humans' genetic material and other bodily fluids sparkly and rainbow colored. Then let's take that thing and make it into another thing where we see the reactions of all the trolls to this. GOGOGO!

Wherein the beta kids have an agreement to form a sedoretu once they're old enough, as told in a series of standalone pesterlogs. Part 1 - Dave, Rose, Jade, and John meet in a chat room on Jade's thirteenth birthday to talk about nothing in particular. Sequel here: http://homesmut.dreamwidth.org/38154.html?thread=39650570