Pepper didn't want to know how Natasha had access to a camera overlooking the gym showers. She just wanted more margaritas.

"Why is Bruce Banner still in New York?" Fury asks, in a tone that suggests he is barely managing to exercise patience.

Clint is really bad at being single. Fury hands Coulson a mission: Find Clint Barton a boyfriend.

“If you don't turn your life into a story, you just become a part of someone else's story.” -The Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents, by Terry Pratchett In which Darcy Lewis works for SHIELD, dates Spider-man and his issues, is roommates with Jessica Jones and her issues, befriends the Avengers she hasn't met yet, and generally manipulates the situation around her to better suit her expectations. Because that's how she rolls.

Clint moves into Avengers Tower, and promptly takes up residence in the air ducts, including the one above Bruce's lab. It soon becomes clear that this isn't just a cracky, quirky behavior.

From a prompt on Avengerkink. Thanks to a magical spell by invading aliens from another realm, Tony Stark becomes a woman...for three months. Obviously there's no way he's not going to take his new body for a test drive. And who better to help him with it that our very own Captain America, Steve Rogers, the straighter-than-a-ruler guy he's been falling in love with totally against his will and who's finally noticing him now...

Where Darcy gets a day job.

It was supposed to be just an assignment. Falling for the person she was supposed to protect wasn’t really in the plan. But when do plans ever stay the same?

Steve had to admit that he had some reservations about how the New Century handled the social balance between alphas and omegas.

Steve hasn't always had this ridiculous crush on Tony Stark. (Or, the one where Steve is his polite old self and doesn't really hate Tony Stark (unfortunately), Tony is a child progidy and apparently a cab driver now, too, and high school is still high school, even when you are the son of a billionaire.)

She never understood Phil, but she was always proud of her brother.

It's Darcy's first day as Tony Stark's new personal assistant. Only one thing in her closet suits this occasion.

“So, physics,” Darcy says when they leave the office. “New Mexico,” Mel counters, equally dubious. “Scientists,” she shudders. Mel shrugs, a gesture that sits oddly on her heavy shoulders, “Can't be worse than theater majors.”

The most popular rumor in SHIELD was that Agent Phil Coulson was created in a lab. The rumor was unproven. It was also true.

“Barton has clearly imprinted on you,” Fury starts, and keeps talking right over Phil’s knee-jerk, horrified, “He has not,” to seal Phil’s doom by saying, “so I’ve decided that you’re going to take primary responsibility for him from now on.” “Oh, god,” Phil says, faintly, before he can stop himself. // Otherwise known as, SHIELD: The Early Years.

In which Phil Coulson prepares to take on the entire universe, plays dead, has a series of tiny adventures with Clint Barton, and solves a problem of his own making.

She's born breech, feet kicking out before the rest of her screams free; she's born breech, and never stops running. (Rule 63!Tony)

From Still Officially Lost by pollyrepeat: “Barton has clearly imprinted on you,” Fury starts, and keeps talking right over Phil’s knee-jerk, horrified, “He has not,” to seal Phil’s doom by saying, “so I’ve decided that you’re going to take primary responsibility for him from now on.” “Oh, god,” Phil says, faintly, before he can stop himself. // Otherwise known as, SHIELD: The Early Years. (PODFIC!)

A whump art meme filled with Tony Stark.

Darcy watched the Avengers defend New York from over two thousand miles away. She could look out her window if she wanted to watch the aftermath. She watches the news instead, and realizes one very important thing: the Avengers have a bit of a PR problem.

"Trust me, and I'll give you something better than a Mockingjay. I'll give you the Avengers." "What's that supposed to mean?" "Trust me, and you'll see." Avengers/Hunger Games fusion crossover/AU.

Everyone knows what happens to the District One girls who win. Natasha Romanov knows, and she knows what she has to do to survive. At least she has Clint to help her through it. That changes when she meets Glimmer, a girl who doesn't have that luxury. Spinoff of The Avenger Games. (NOTE: the rape/non-con/dub-con/underage/forced prostitution warnings are tagged to be safe, but are NOT graphically depicted. Talked about, dealt with, yes. But not in real-time.)

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but you’re not my father.”

Five times Clint was painfully aware that he was the 'dumbest' in the group and one time his brains saved the day.

After what Clint did while under Loki’s control – and he remembers every detail, every decision, every twitch of muscle – Clint burns with self-loathing. He never counted on Natasha’s unwavering, unconditional support, nor did he imagine that he’d ever have someone who cared enough to fight Clint himself for his forgiveness.

Bruce and Tony are working in the lab when Bruce happens to glance at Tony's screen...

Tony is trying very hard to be the perfect boyfriend. Maybe too hard. But that's okay because Pepper has a simple solution to get Tony to relax and nurture his other relationships too. "Hello, Captain. What can I do for you?" "It's about Tony," he says immediately, his soldier's efficiency not allowing for any dallying. "We - the Avengers, that is - have some concerns."

Ronon watches over Bruce and Logan because Sheppard asks him to do so. Bruce and Tony like having Ronon around. Smut ensues, lots of slashy smut.

Phil Coulson is miserable, distrusted by most of SHIELD, and still doesn't remember why. It's only going to get worse before it gets better.

"Okay. So. Kids. It can't be too hard, right? People dumber than us raise kids all the time. Not much to them. Just feed them, water them, distract them with shiny things and make sure they aren't unsupervised for too long. Speaking of which, how long has tiny-spawn been alone in your kitchen?" Steve and Tony (and The Avengers!) from the movie!cast + child!Peter Parker with a very AU backstory involving genetic experimentation aboard an abandoned space station (but that doesn't--strangely enough--feature all that heavily).

Steve goes on a road trip to clear his head, but the other Avengers won't leave him alone.

Steve is the best cuddler. There is no doubt. They don't even take a vote; there is no point. Steve wins.

Darcy's never been too excited about being born on the Fourth of July.

In which Coulson is his frighteningly competent self, but this time, the Avengers notice.

Natasha has reconciled herself to the past in ways he can't yet, in ways he might never be able to.

When he was younger, Clint wished really hard for someone. This fic is the prequel to 'you're the one who sees the darkness on the edge of town', which I've previously podficced here.

Six times Steve and Thor hang out.

So there's this project Tony has been working on since he was ten years old which is only marginally less awesome than the specs for the TARDIS he totally could have built if Fury would've just let him had the Tesseract for a couple hours longer.

"I am hugging you," Thor explained. "That you may know I love you, despite your madness."

"How was I to know?" Thor demanded. "Surely a 'Justice of the Peace' is meant to sentence evildoers! And why did he not say otherwise, if it was not so?"

"Experience has taught Natasha that bonding over shoes is a sure way to win over women when you're undercover. She didn't realize that for Pepper, shoes were a little more important than that."

Tony Stark says very important things all the time but no one ever takes him seriously, not even when they really should. So when Tony says he's going to buy an island, sure, no one listens to him because apparently they think that kind of "hyperbole" doesn't need a response. The thing is though, Tony Stark actually can buy an island so he does and now the Avengers have an island that they can use as needed. Do they ever thank him for it? No. They don't even treat it as a learning experience for the next time he says something a little off beat but definitely right. So when Tony Stark says, "You know what Loki really needs is a Xanax," everyone except Steve ignores him. "Tony!" Steve says. If he had pearls, he'd be clutching them. "He is actually trying to destroy the world." "That's what I'm saying," Tony says as he loads a vial filled with green liquid into one of his wrist-guard missiles. "Does that sound like the action of a calm, rational, non-neurotic person to you?"

Sometimes, you really can go home again.

So here I am again, more fan art for another one of astolat's amazing story's. This one is Loki with Thor at his mercy!

Clint has OCD. They work with it. After all, this is the Avengers; everyone's got quirks. (This fic is Part 1 of the Mindset 'verse.)

Chairing some guys to death, please hold