When Tyrion neglects to impregnate Sansa with the heir to Winterfell, Tywin decides to take matters into his own hands. But Sansa is no longer a little Northern dove; she is a Lannister with nothing left to lose.

The common folk whisper about the Council of Kings and Queens that rules over Westeros. They whisper that they are the Seven reborn.

A super-cracky modern!AU where Akatsuki is a group of quasi-reformed terrorists and former suicide squad now (nominally) on the side of the angels, saving the planet their own way. Mostly accidentally. Or through recycling. (That's entirely Obito's fault.)

Brienne looks like the perfect portrait of a knight, kneeling in supplication before her lady.

plotless pointless, not quite full blown first time smut, Renly centric character bit

Steve didn't know you could go to college to study movies.

"What gives?" he says then, as he shrugs his way out of the gi and you watch the changing shadows under his collarbone. "Some chump at this party still has a turtleneck on." "Yeah, well, some asshole around here doesn't know how to shut up and let himself be spoiled," you say. "Get in the goddamn tub, Strider."

How the Princess Kanae fell in love with the young knightling Hotaru.

After they're captured by Red Templars, Vivienne saves Blackwall from rape.

A snowstorm forces Cullen, Bull, and Dorian to confront the history they share. Together they find a new way forward.

In order to save his home, The Iron Bull returns to work as a professional Dom for a company known only as Inquisition. Dorian Pavus, known by the code name of Urthemiel within the Inqusition's carefully guarded walls, is considered a difficult client, and placed with The Iron Bull in the hopes that he can help. Together, they build something better than they were before.

Vanessa comes home to find Wade in a world of pain. She helps him take it over the edge to something he can deal with.

Wade and Vanessa have a Real Adult Conversation. With nudity!

You’re alone, you’re on your own So what? Have you forgotten what you have and what is yours? The thing that he expected: Kicking Hotaru off the team for his own safety. The thing that he didn’t prepare for: Literally everything else that happened in the next twenty-four hours.

Kanae had never wanted a friend as badly as she wanted Hotaru. She had strong, platonic feelings towards her. (Problem is, they’re not platonic. Problem is, she doesn’t realize it.)

Hotaru has dreams about Matsuoka and Yukimura. They’re totally platonic. Up until they’re not, and Hotaru ends up wondering what they’d all be like together. Even that totally wouldn’t happen. Because they’re not dating her. Y’know. Yet.

Once upon a time there was virginal, chaste Kagome. And then there wasn't.

Kmeme prompt: Zevran and Alistair are in a room. There weapons are gone and neither of them can pick locks. The room has only one door very heavy door, no windows, a bed and a jar of oil on the nightstand. Not too odd yeah? Only problem, they have both been dosed with a strong aphrodisiac. Started as a very simple PWP and then ... grew. Like kudzu.

From a prompt on the kmeme: Two DA characters of your choice roleplay two other DA characters.

From a prompt on the kmeme: It seems to this OP that Isabela's gender often becomes an overwhelming aspect of her character. Not necessarily a bad thing, but it got OP to wondering about how Isabela would be both different and the same if she were a man. How would her companions and the world around her respond? Could be an AU in which Isabela was always a man or a magical accident that turns her into a man. Sweet, serious or utterly cracktastic fine by OP. Any, many or no LI just dandy. Artfill or fic would be excellent.

Dear god, I just needed to write some PWP. The ever-lovely flutiebear suggested this prompt. Seamus gets deflowered by either Hawke or Anders... The one not deflowering...assists.

It was just Rodney's luck that the guy with the strongest expression of the ATA gene on Earth was some lanky alpha who couldn't follow an order as basic as "don't touch anything."

Oberyn Martell knows how to handle a spear, say the whisperers; he is a vicious fighter and his blade is always poisoned. It’s hardly surprising, then, that poisoned, too, is his invitation. (Missing scene set during A Storm of Swords)

“Now about that gift I got you, remember how you’ve been all wistful about your concupiscent quadrants? Well I got you something to fix that.” “What,” Karkat said blankly. “Gamzee no, tell me you didn’t get me sex toys.” The good news is that it's not sextoys The bad news is that it's a person.

This is how Sidney Crosby ends up in Alex Ovechkin's living room, one wolf cub in his lap and another gnawing on his Reeboks.

“Ith not,” you stutter, glaring at your hands. “M’ Noth a-a freak,” you squint at your shaking fingers, trying to make a spark, to catch a glimpse of either red or blue. There’s nothing.

Equius grew tired of the solitude of his workshop and decided to venture out to the castle that appeared in his bubble in search of the company of another. What he found was far from what he could have ever expected.

Karkat has more secrets than just his freakish blood, but he can't hide forever.

Oh, huh. There are breasts at the other end of that poking stick. Bare ones. "She says, she does not care if you look at the wrong places that don't make words, but if you think you don't have to answer with words she may let me eat you." Right. So. The shadow. That's a dragon's wing.

GC: 1F YOU GUYS FORC3 M3 TO FL1P 4SH3N 4ND TH3R3FOR3 D3PR1V3 M3 OF 4LL TH4T 4CROB4T1C S3XU4L CONGR3SS W3 S1GN3D ON FOR *TH3 PUN1SHM3NT SH4LL F1T TH3 CR1M3 3X4CTLY* GC: BY WH1CH 1 M34N MY C4N3 H1D3S TWO R3C3NTLY-SH4RP3N3D BL4D3S 4ND 1T S3R3ND1P1TOUSLY H4PP3NS TH4T B3TW33N TH3 TWO OF YOU YOU GUYS H4V3 TWO BON3BULG3S GC: WH1CH M1GHT NOT ST4Y TH3 C4S3 LONG -- Okay, good! Terezi, Dave and Karkat have finally figured out this quadrant dating thing. Now to figure out which twosome gets to hook up first.

Jade and Tavros invite Dave for his first xeno experience.

When you ask if you can tie Karkat up tonight, he’s basically not surprised at all. It’s not an all-the-time-always thing, but it’s pretty standard! So he’s not surprised, no, but he still goes bright red and shrugs with one shoulder and says sure, he guesses he doesn’t have a problem with it (like you can’t totally see just how hard he’s blushing). It’s pretty dang adorable.

Prompts from my blog, cleaned up and organized by pairing. This one is for Davekat. Hope you enjoy!

Life may suck but at least Dave still owns a copy of Grease.

Dave and Karkat have storytime with the trollmance novel. -If Dave isn’t going to get jolly over some fantasy troll getting eaten out, he is maybe going to get a little jolly over Karkat getting jolly over some fantasy troll getting eaten out.-

Equikat, everyone's a dom or sub AU. -- The thing with Equius is, he's huge, and he's ripped, and he has a low, carrying voice, and he's bossy as fuck. Before he started wearing Karkat's collar he let people who were not directly concerned assume whatever they wanted out of his hearing, and he never came back home weary, never went straight to Karkat's desk to kneel there at his feet, silent and drawn in and waiting for a hand to caress his hair like he was a statue on the verge of crumbling into dust and only Karkat's touch might ward off that fate.

He felt like the naked girl who'd just been a white wolf and the half-naked guy who'd just been a mangled corpse dragged into his barn by a wolf completely deserved his screaming. The ~magical~ turd-licking fence-fuckers masquerading as his classmates had been sneak-flirting with him for weeks. "Is my life actually a shitty supernatural romance?! Am I going to develop more special than you powers that somehow never matter half as much as who I fuck? Am I supposed to arbitrate your little game of which one of you is the sexiest alpha male by gracing them with my boy cooch?" -- now with sequel pesterlog silliness.

"It's okay! We're just seducing you for better grades!" Poor Karkat, accosted by jailbait. What a tragic life a TA leads.

"Double-check the wards properly! Dying of awesome sex would be a good way to go if we have to, but I'm not keeling over before I get my diploma, okay?" John rolls his eyes. "Yeah, yeah." Jade keeps watching him from the corner of her eye for a few seconds; he seems to be doing it seriously, at least, even if he's still huffy. "Bluh. I get why you'd need to pass demonology, but not why I need it if my major is weather magic." -- Anonymous asked: John/Jade/Karkat - John and Jade are demon summoners (for reasons) trying to call up an incubus/succubus (for reasons). They get Karkat.

CG: ANYWAY, I’VE BEEN TALKING TO HIM ABOUT SOME STUFF BECAUSE IT’S MARGINALLY BETTER THAN SPEWING IT INTO THE SCORCHED WASTELAND THAT IS THE NOOKSCRAPING MEMO SYSTEM. CG: AND THEN HE SAYS STUFF AND IT KIND OF. CG: MAKES ME FEEL BETTER. GA: That Does Sound Upsetting GA: I Can See Why You Came To Me Karkat and Dave stumble into moirallegiance.

John Egbert is totally the master of hateflirting.

Some days she maybe secretly wishes a tiny bit she didn't have to climb a rope to get home, but today she landed a miscreant in human jail to reflect on his crimes and she feels grimly victorious, enough to combat the fatigue. "Hallo the den of iniquity! I'm home!" she yells when she makes it to the landing, after she has spat her briefcase's handle out of her mouth. (The serrated corner almost gets her in the foot.) -- Terezi, Karkat and Dave do the totally ordinary suburban married life thing, with great success.

Naruto is hot. Kakashi is losing his mind.

Morality and logical limits are not Orochimaru’s strong point, even as a loyal Konoha shinobi. Thankfully, it seems that parenting actually is.

He pushes off the bed in one smooth motion, and your bloodpusher skips a beat as he takes a step towards you. “Really.” “If, if you’re trying to imply anything lewd—” “Lewd? Seriously? You sound like Zahhak.” Another step. Your voice is too shrill when you ask, “But are you?” He braces one hand against the wall over your shoulder, tilts his head to the side, and smirks in that infuriating, awful way. “What do you think?”

AC: :33 < *ac wanders over to her furrends hive and carefully places a purresent of a freshly killed cluckbeast on the ground* AC: :33 < *she scratches tentatively at his door and asks if dave is home* AC: :33 < *she thinks that if he isnt she can find other ways to spend her evening but that it would be much more fun to spend it together* TG: *dave types sup on his keyboard* AC: :33 < booo thats cheating!!! TG: *dave types how is this cheating on his keyboard* TG: oh wait TG: *akwete purrmusk types how is this cheating on his keyboard*

CRONUS: vwhat i'm trying to say here is that i vwant to engage in a mutual stimulation of erogenous zones vwith you, perhaps in a starbucks hygiene block, and then make a wvery humble request about possibly getting you to hop on the bandvwagon for my nevwest project. CRONUS: but i really can't emphasize enough the part vwhere i blovw you to obliwvion vwithout any expectation that this vwill affect your decision vwith respect to my musical endeawvors, because that's just the kind of selfless guy i am. CRONUS: vwhat do you say?

Rose needs peace and quiet to get on with her writing. You'd think that'd be easy in the limitless void of deep space, but no.

Your first mistake is when you spot the shirt with 'daddy' written on it in sparkling pink letters... and somehow fail to leave. You're thinking about it, you're definitely thinking about it, it would be so easy to just toss a twenty on the table and make a run for it-- But then he spots you and waves. Trapped. He tucks his hands into his pockets, ah yes, accidentally pulling his leather jacket wider open, just in case you managed to miss his shirt before. As he weaves his way through the tables, he gives you a nod that seems far too studied to actually be casual, and looks you up and down in a way that makes you grimace.

Prolly if the two of you had handled this on your own, it woulda turned bloody real fast. You're guessin' neither of you woulda been willin' to let it go without the other one dead, and who the fuck knows what that coulda done to your two groups of friends. Now, you ain't gonna fuck shit up for everyone else if you can help it, but like fuck are you just gonna let Feferi Peixes have her own way. Not over your dead body, necessarily. But... maybe over hers. Lucky for the two of you, lil' Vantas McNubs is way too nosy for his own good. An' way too persistent. An' way too fuckin' precious to ever, ever hurt. It was gettin' real coddamn ugly the first time he jumped in between you. Feferi was just about ready to go for you, an' like shell were you lettin' her get away with that bullshit, an' both of you were there with your tridents out an' all, an' there's Karkat, just jumpin' in the middle like it ain't no thing.