This is an AU in which the elemental countries are modern nation-states locked into an uneasy regional standoff. Sakura, Naruto, and Sasuke (and others!) meet at a summer camp as children, and later end up working both to create a more lasting peace and to move their country away from a clan-based oligarchy toward a true democracy. Or something like that. I was just trying to write a 'camp counselors at a lake' thing, but the sociopolitical background took me hostage and ran away with my writing mojo. *wry*

Madara lied about the eye transplant's effects. Captured and brought back to Konoha, Sasuke must adjust to blindness and his unexpected survival. (One main story with two sidefics.)

In which Cap makes new friends, becomes an accidental Internet troll, swaps a lot of stories, and gives Bucky Barnes a hug.

Derek can handle this. He can. “You can do this,” he says, to his pale and pinched-looking reflection, to the faint bags under his eyes and the tension creases at the corners of his mouth. If he says it enough times it’ll stick sooner or later.

Movieverse. Speed's a brilliant engineer and athlete. He could have such brilliant futures ahead of him, but "your son seems to be interested in only one thing."

Rukia and Orihime have some soft, quiet moments together. Written for Porn Battle, with the prompt: Rukia/Orihime, grooming as foreplay/a sign of affection.

Everyone is concerned about Sidney and Geno. It takes awhile for Sidney to figure out what everyone is talking about, though.

Rukia and Orihime decide to make Ichigo shared property: Genderswap edition

Closet 'verse sequel (what it says on the tin)

Team Girls shall be victorious! Or, Rukia and Orihime decide to make Ichigo shared property.

It’s not even a big deal. Frankly, Derek doesn’t understand what Laura’s problems is when she’s the one who used to tease him so much about his compulsive gym rat routine.

Derek comes back to Beacon Hills for a number of reasons. The most important one, though, is the result of a one night stand in Vegas. He's knocked up and Alpha, and Cora won't stop playing Papa Don't Preach whenever she gets to pick the music in the car. This shit just keeps happening to him. Or, in which Derek gets the D, Stiles gets the D, then Derek gets Stiles's D.

When Trish Barnes walks into the Dreamatorium and becomes Constable Reggie, it doesn't seem like anything's going to go any differently than it had the other times she and Abia became the Inspector and Constable. Until Abia tells her that to release the bonds keeping Inspector Spacetime the prisoner of the Floobidians, all Trish needs to do is tell Abia a huge secret. And only one secret comes to mind.

Abed made the rules.

Jeff has a weakness for adorable and Abed knows it.

Troy and Abed film the Kickpuncher sex scene.

Greendale receives two last-minute transfers and Jeff doesn't get jealous. At all.

“Okay,” Troy says, “I am not a Magical Negro. I just happen to have special abilities that I use to heal a large number of white people and oh.” “See?” Britta says. “Fight the power, Troy!” (Or, the one where Troy being the Truest Repairman turns out to be way more trouble than it's worth.)

Troy leaves. The group adjusts. Abed is selfish.

Mid-season three, Abed discovers and addresses Jeff’s ongoing depression using Twitter, Batman analogies, media analysis, buttered noodles, and shadow puppets.

Graduation day should ideally include two hook-ups, a thrown punch, a massive secret, and a proposal, but apparently they’re all going to have to settle for Britta’s eyebrow piercing and the revelation that Jeff’s a Brony.

"If we're going with the whole pack dynamics thing, I nominate Pierce for omega," Abed said.

The first time Troy dreamed about Abed, it was weird. And that's just the beginning.

Abed finds a little bundle of joy on his doorstep. A montage happens.

Abed's attempt to foster room-mate bonding via TV shows doesn't work as well as he would have hoped. Is there anything he, Troy and Annie can all agree on?

Annie has put a lot of time and effort into being a normal person. Troy and Abed, not so much.

Annie didn't plan to act on her feelings, of course. But then Britta went on her rant about porn.

But she would be damned if she would let Andre take her legs out from underneath her.

Troy and Abed and Annie in the bedroom! (Or, how Troy and Abed asked Annie to join them, and how she figured out that it was okay to say yes.)

Annie still can’t believe she’s even asking the question.

Nadir’s body of work has been examined before—and in much broader and deeper contexts than this blog!—most notably in 24 Hours to Live, the collection of essays edited by Rachel Baxter, and his own What I Thought About the Movies I Made: The Abed Nadir Story—but for those of you already saying tl;dr, here’s an abbreviated summation of how auteur theory lets us realize the true brilliance of Nadir’s filmmaking.

A kiss for each member of the study group.

Annie, Abed, and Troy have a close encounter of the threesome kind in the Dreamatorium.

Things aren’t going according Annie’s plan. The gang graduates.

Troy and Abed roleplay a sex pollen scenario in the Dreamatorium.

Troy and Abed are in a relationship. This offers Abed the opportunity to explore a classic entertainment trope from porn videos.

"Troy/Abed- faux bodyswap smut." Requested by biohazardgirl on easternepiphany's fic meme.

GDI BECKY HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FUNCTION But yes Stiles totally does this.

Abed introduces Troy to Firefly. Troy starts crying when Book dies in Serenity. Abed's not sure why.

"We should get beds," Abed commented, as he shifted to make himself the big spoon. "It probably wouldn't be so cold if we weren't on the floor." "That's some grownup shit," Troy said sleepily, and stuck his cold toes between Abed's freakishly long calves. "We could be ready," Abed said, and he settled his hand on Troy's hip. Troy didn't say anything at all.

Annie isn't jealous of Abed and Troy having sex at all.

So, yeah. This is longer than 500 words. I started writing and immediately got sucked into (super basic) world-building and (minimal) scene-setting, which is exactly what this exercise is supposed to prevent. When I realized what I was doing I said well shit and skipped straight to the porn, which, unsurprisingly, also didn’t limit itself to 500 words. And then that little scene-setting bit was up there just looking accusingly at me, so I finished it off to some extent, and that’s what you have here: a little chunk of set-up and a little chunk of smut, extremely sloppily stuck together. Maybe I’ll make this less sloppy some day. It was terrific fun to write. This is a post-Sburb universe reset where the game made a little mistake and accidentally swapped the players’ species on the way out. Whoopsies! There’s possibly some body-dysphoria business going on if you’re sensitive to that, but nothing too extreme.

Abed realizes that Troy has been the most supportive friend ever, and decides to do something awesome for him. Things don't go exactly according to plan. Includes faux-telepathy, secret gay thoughts, and a guy who sounds just like Morgan Freeman.

Tim, apparently, really likes peppermint. Much to the detriment of others around him when he gets his hands on some.

Tim never was one for sharing his plans with others.

Tim doesn't expect his time in the hospital to be very eventful.

Jason had thought that putting Tim in a dress and forcing him into the public would be a good show. He's right. Just not in the way he'd thought.

He teams up with Red Hood Tuesday nights for patrol, and while it's not quite the date Tim could want it's what he'll take.

Tim sleeps in the attic every Christmas Eve. It doesn't really mean much, it's just habit by now.

The request for help was coded enough that it was understood exactly how deep Tim and Cassandra were undercover. Dick's still surprised by how far under they are.