Bruce Wayne is either really bad at Twitter, or really, really good.

The Sith Lord Darth Vader lived his life. He probably didn't live it well, but he lived it as well as he knew how. At the end there, he'd even managed to woman up and kill Sidious. But he was dying, and at peace with the past. The past wasn't at peace with him.

Jim has a couple different lies he likes to tell about how he got his Jolteon, depending on his audience.

Sometimes the other Vulcans wonder how Spock managed to obtain such an exotic bondmate, and sometimes Spock wonders himself.

Prompt from the Star Trek XI Kink Meme on lj. Prompt: K/S. So, this idea kind of hit me out of nowhere. Pretty much following the tradition of aliens-made-them-do-it [only kind of inverted], in which Kirk and Spock end up at a planet where they are not allowed to touch each other [due to religious issues, politeness protocol, whatever]. Summary: Anticipation was not an emotion Spock had intended to allow himself to feel; yet, it made itself known despite him, and that it was never satisfied made it harder to suppress, each time the Captain walked past or stood near and conscientiously avoided even the brush of their sleeves.

Turns out Jim Kirk's more than meets the eye, genetically speaking. There are a lot of consequences, mostly for Spock and his sanity.

“Give me a minute. Or five." Keith had totally planned it from the beginning, and Shiro didn't mind. Not at all.

For Jillian, looking directly at Erin felt like staring into the sun, something that had left her with a pretty heavy prescription for color corrective lenses as a kid. It was dangerous, and it hurt, but it was just so beautiful it made everything worth it.

cosmictuesdays: Leverage meets the new Ghostbusters team.

Salty parabolas ain't got nothing on cheese and gravy. Or, Abby and Holtzmann's first meeting.

"I used to lie under my bed and wonder what it was like to be dead," Erin says, lying in the back of the hearse. Even with the rails taken out, it isn't very comfortable. The clattering stops. Holtzmann leans back, still halfway out the window with one socked foot hooked under the steering wheel, to look at her. "How did you die?"

Science isn't everything. Times Patty's historical knowledge helps the Ghostbusters.

In the name of family bonding, Roxy, Rose, Dave, and Dirk play a game of truth or dare. (They may regret this plan.)

Keith can't have nice things. That's it. That's the story. (Or, in which Keith slowly learns that sometimes the best family is the one you make, Pidge has strong feelings about peanuts, Lance has a secret but would've spoken up sooner if he'd known it would break Keith's brain, Hunk is the actual best, and Shiro is just relieved he didn't have to give anyone the Talk.)

or alternatively titled "The Space Power Rangers Try to Figure Out If Shiro Has a Natural Winged Eyeliner Look Going On Because He's Fly Like That or Not and End Up Failing"

Of course, someone has to disturb the peace. “Hey Pidge! About the Blue Lion, could you-OH MY GOD YOU’RE BLEEDING!” Pidge looks down and finds that yes…they are. Huh. There’s a dark line of red running down their leg…hey when did that happen? Pidge doesn’t remember doing anything that could-OH. MY. GOSH. THEY’RE BLEEDING! IT’S BLEEDING BUT NOT THAT KIND OF BLEEDING.

The day the rest of the team found out Keith is a former K-Pop idol.

"Well, you can't ALL be the space prostitute." Coran protested, then appeared to muse it over. "Although..."

I received a request to write an AU wherein humans were marked by their lifetime bonds with patterns on their arms. Romantic love, family, friendship, and enemies are all fair game, but Keith has gone his whole life without a single mark. That is, until he got stranded in space with the members of team Voltron and Allura and Coran. Romantic Klance +platonic ot5. Follow me on tumblr @lissa-molloy for more Voltron fun.

Lance can knit sweaters for people as well [Gen, MAJOR SPOILERS for up to episode 6]

Slumped in the common room, sweaty and gross, it started simply with: “No offense guys, but right now I’d kill you all for a chocolate bar.”

It was supposed to be an easy mission: a Galra base that was, for all intents and purposes, abandoned on a primitive planet. Get in, download the base's info logs, get out. Simple. Of course, when Lance realized he was going to be put together with Keith on this mission, simple went out the window.

Keith pinches his eyes shut, slamming the book down again and swiveling to face Lance. “Oh my god,” he groans, standing up and crossing the two feet between them before Lance can get out a word. He grabs Lance’s face between his hands (perhaps a bit rougher than needed, but hey, he’s always wanted to slap Lance’s stupid face) and the last thing he sees is an expression of pure surprise before he leans down and presses his lips against Lance's. It’s a peck, and it lasts a second, and then it’s over. Keith leans back, releasing Lance’s face, and hisses, “There.”

"The first time it happens, Pidge is just a moment shy of passing out."

What happens in the lion stays in the lion. Shiro needs some down time, and the lion thinks he's too stubborn for his own good.

Keith stood under the hot spray of the shower head, his eyes closed as he focused inward, trying desperately to regain some sense of composure. He wasn’t quite certain what was wrong with him today; he was the one moving out of sync in their training exercises, he’d run himself into an invisible maze-wall so hard he was dizzy for a quarter hour after it, and he swore he could still feel the static jolt under his skin. When Shiro had touched his shoulder, eyes concerned, his touch was like a fresh electric current and Keith had yanked himself away.

Damn puberty. Lance blames space. Space puberty. Space puberty is making life super difficult for him--especially since now, he can't STOP looking at Shiro and his buff arms and his great thighs and his great actually everything. [Lance, due to the wonders of Space Puberty, is super into Shiro. Only problem is, he's not exactly sure what else to do besides desperately obsess over how hot their leader is.]

Keith just wants to spend some quiet time outside. But then there's Hunk and rain and an offer of a dry shirt to replace his wet clothes.

The paladins introduce Allura to the age-old Earthling game of truth or dare. Keith shares unwelcome knowledge about his sex habits. Hunk may or may not eat a sock. Somehow, sexual tension and relief ensues. Also, there are jokes.

Lance has an epiphany and Keith makes a confession. Also, they fuck.

Being away from Earth means going without heat suppressants. This proves to be a problem for Lance who has been avoiding his heats since puberty. Lucky for him Shiro and Keith are willing to help. “I thought that was why you were being such a jerk.” Keith’s feet shuffled over over the carpet. “You know. Another omega in your space?” “No, I just really find you annoying.”

"Hot space catboy Shiro, please. Just hanging out with his tail and ears sticking out of his uniform, or going into heat, or maybe affectionately head-rubbing all of the crew. Anything with catboy!Shiro."

Five Times Shiro couldn't be knocked off balance, one time he was, and one time he trusted the team to see. Or, when sibling bonding goes wrong. (Standalone story: You do NOT need to read the previous in the 'series' for this)

Five times that no one was thinking of Shiro as a dad.

Wade naked was a sight to behold; something akin to the traumatised beauty of broken glass, a burnt out forest, a dilapidated building. Or so Peter thought as Wade stripped away his costume and headed to the bathroom.

Sollux has been looking at you at least once every five minutes for the past hour, and you can tell by the way he's worrying his lip, hardly listening as John bullshits him about some shitty tech job he did last week, that he's just not going to last the night. You bet the fact that the buzzing between his legs is at a different tempo than the one playing over the speakers is really wearing thin on his patience.

Homestuck Vid

They were in another timeline. It happened occasionally. Who even knew how Wade got involved. He was just trying to show Darcy how many tacos he could fit in his mouth (six), and then blammo: Big flash of light, whirling space vortex, the indescribable sensation of the universe contracting with you inside it to the size of a single electron, and then everybody was spat out in a heap on the sidewalk of a place that looked like -- but probably wasn’t -- New York, and all of Wade’s tacos de sesos were lost to the interdimensional void. “Nooo,” Wade whispered, heartbroken. “Tacos.”

Something strange happened to Wade. Well, something strange always happens to Wade. But this type of strange involves an alien ray, Wanda (aka Lady Deadpool), and some slight errors with his regeneration in another universe. Luckily, the Merc with the Mouth has an Ultimate Amazing boyfriend and a newly adopted sister/doppelganger to help him through. Or Deadpool is atomized, and comes back home with lady parts.

The name’s Deadpool, and I’m here to tell you about how me and the great Steve Rogers hooked up. Spoiler alert, it was banging hot.

Every Tuesday, Head Auror Harry Potter gets a new secretary, until one day he hires Draco Malfoy, who is oddly determined to find out why.

The diagrams are maybe Dave's favorite part.

Dirk has come to terms with sharing his famous brother with the world, but there are some things he wants to keep for himself. (Heads up for nsfw art right in your face)

'cause we make a great team Boredom's a real killer when you've topped your resume by taking down an international criminal organization. Wade's been in the market for a new pet project, and who should happen to come along but our friendly neighborhood Spider-Man? Peter's understandably a little shy of our charming Merc with the Mouth, but luckily for him, he happens to know a certain damsel not-so-much-in-distress that's willing to serve as an excellent character witness. From there it's just a short hop, skip, and one huge leap for spiderkind into a whole new world of trouble for our web-slinging hero. Good thing he's starting to learn to like trouble. Featuring: stalking (for justice and otherwise), showtunes, a series of increasingly improbable dinner dates, the Apartment of Doom, a judicious amount of mad science, homoerotic fight sequences, highly sexual tai-chi, musical montages, and a truly sickening amount of domestic bliss.

Peter and Wade try out one of Wade's kinks.

The strap-on was Wade's idea in the first place.

In another time and place, Wade would have gone back to Weasel’s bar and met the love of his life, Vanessa. However, in this life, predicated by a squeaky skateboard wheel, he met Peter instead. Between robot invasions, mad scientists, and civil disagreements, they have their work cut out for them. Many Princess Peach references are made.

So this story is about the time I fucked up— [ONE of the times you fucked up] —and pissed off Shiklah, my wife. She decided to punish me with the help of a couple of her henchdemons, and kinky fun was had by all.

Usually I’m not the kinda guy to end things prematurely, but you may have noticed that a certain scene in my movie (I know you know the one I mean) got cut off before it really had a chance to get started. So here it is, for all your perverted pegging pleasure: my full-length, uncut account of International Women’s Day.

What is it about Spidey that gets me so worked up? The sassy banter? The lithe physique? The skin-tight spandex? The bondage? [Bingo.] {It’s totally the bondage.}