A lighthearted romantic comedy that lampoons the adult film business, the mainstream media, and the natural vanity of actors while exploring the earliest stages of a brand new relationship.

“He thinks I have stigmata,” Frank said, because what the fucking hell, it couldn’t get any worse. He might as well just lay it out. “Oh, well,” said Brian into his hands. “Of course.”

"The castle is sweltering in the midsummer heat, stones breathing damply under the sun's height when even the air lies still."

I was saying something on Twitter about how much easier it is to write really dirty-hot fic when Adam Lambert is involved, because while, eg, fanon!Ryan Ross may think he's a sex god, fanon!Adam actually is. ... and then someone said something about Adam/RyRo, and this happened.

"So what's the problem?" Elizabeth asked. "They won't talk to us unless we sing first," John said.

Vampires Will Never Hurt You: Gerard clenches his fists tighter. "It's a disease," he says defensively. You Only Hear the Music When Your Heart...: Frank has high school figured out. His mom has given up arguing about the amount of time he spends in Gerard's basement, and he doesn't actually care if people think it's weird that he and Gerard hold hands in the hallways and go to the bathroom together. The only thing Frank cares about is figuring out why Gerard's suddenly avoiding him -- because what's the point of losing your virginity on Prom Night if you can't tell your best friend about it in the morning?

Jared centeric-if you see Cupid, bitchslap that little motherfucker for me, will ya

Jared was raised as a girl.

So not how Tim had planned to spend his three days off in Athens. Really absolutely NOT ho he planned on that.

Their friendship is hard to explain.

"Things started going to shit as soon as they entered Bruce Wayne's mind." Inception/The Dark Knight crossover fic. (Not as crazy as it sounds, I swear!)

Darcy should have seen it coming. She couldn't hang around the spandex crowd forever and not end up with a great big target painted on her back eventually. She was just surprised it took Loki so long.

His best friend keeps cockblocking him, his relationship guru is a computer, and he might be gay. The future is very complicated.

Terrorists develop a riot-inducing spray that has unexpected effects on America's only Super Soldier.

"The fifth season of Supernatural, CW's paranormal drama, is scheduled for a return to our screens in autumn. Show creator Eric Kripke is reported to be "thrilled" with the news that show stars, Jared Padelecki and Jensen Ackles, have confirmed they'll be returning as brothers Dean and Sam Winchester. CW sources confirm that shooting is due to start soon with the first episode due to air on September 20th, 2012." It's been nearly three years since the war against the alien race known as the Others changed the world and nearly four months since they were beaten back by Earth's natural superweapons, the dragons. Jared's looking forward to reconnecting with his best friend and picking up life where he left off. It doesn't seem much to ask but after three years, how much has really changed? And are the secrets Jensen's hiding better left alone?

Six events in Derek and Stiles' life where Stiles does something to make Derek growl at him and they choke those around them with all of the UST. Then finally Derek explains to Stiles why he's been acting like this.

For the prompt, "Blowjobs are super helpful for calming people down."

Doktor Karl Scmidt(Sesbastian Shaw) worked closely with other Nazi scientists such as Johann Schmidt, the Red Skull. It is in his care that the Doktor leaves Erik for further "experiments" and "training" when he cannot continue the work personally. Being in the grip of the Nazi's nightmare subdivision, HYDRA, puts Erik in place to be found by a recently made Captain America on his first rescue mission. Now instead of being trapped by his tormentors, Erik finds himself cared for by a different sort of human in the forms of Howard Stark, Peggy Carter, and Steve Rogers as he discovers his powers and himself.

Insta-fic! Inspired by the vid of emo boys kissing so generously linked to by ladycat777 and ros_fod, my version of kissing on a dare with a high-school aged Spike and Xander.

"What's with the dress?"

Stiles and Lydia never should have become friends, for Derek’s sake.

Megamind still has some important life lessons to learn. Roxanne is once again here to help.

Sequel to Serpens Armarem! The Dark Lord has risen, and Harry soon finds out that his absence from Hogwarts doesn't excuse him from the coming war, while back at school Neville realises that not all evil takes the form of Death Eaters. AU, slash

Hardison built a robot to fight, but he gave it artificial intelligence to win. He didn’t expect it to come to life and for it to become such a big part of his life.

Arthur's known since he was young that he has a knack for cooking and baking, and beginning culinary school only makes him more certain. But no matter how good he is, it seems Eames is better – which does not endear him to Arthur in the slightest. Eames, however, is quite determined to get Arthur to open up and stop being so uptight and prickly by any means necessary. While each hones his skill in the culinary arts (and Arthur desperately tries to convince Ariadne that the desired structural integrity of her cakes violates basic laws of physics), they increasingly find themselves drawn together, inside the classroom and out. Given such close quarters in the kitchen, and the amount of sensory stimulation involved with preparing all manner of food, it starts to become difficult for Arthur to retain his customary level of distance and detachment. And, as Arthur will find, when it comes to unsatisfied appetites, hunger is often the best sauce of all.

Steve Rogers is a capable leader, a kind and cheerful man, a good friend, a strong role model, and a loyal soldier. He's also teetering on the edge of suicide.

"We should probably go soon, anyway," she says. "There's an unconscious man in the ladies' bathroom with 'wanker' written on his forehead – people are going to start asking questions."

You should totally write something about Darren and Chris relieving the tension of shooting this episode (3x05).

Hope was a professional, and somehow anything of this nature seemed just a few pegs lower than professional. NoelxHope, office sex.

"The first time Steve meets Toni is about a week after he wakes up."

Scorpius has a stutter. Al has a way with words. Draco discovers their unlikely relationship.

Author's choice; author's choice; "It was sex pollen, I swear!"

Steve is adapting well to the new millennium, and he has the dictionary to prove it.

"I saw this and thought of you," Brad tells him, voice shaking with the effort not to laugh. & Musical Tour AU. The one where Kris is almost painfully clueless but Adam wants to date him anyway.

When Johnny comes back from the Negative Zone, he needs all the support he can get. He wants it from his lover and his ex-wife. Peter and Lyja want what's best for him.

Unorthodox Methods: "AU from original premise of SPN – Sam goes to law school and eventually joins the FBI, where he gets assigned as Peter’s probie, and the New York FBI office staff are amused, and eventually, slightly traumatized." pockets full of stones: "This is a trick." my favorite view: "The one where Jon is a fetish photographer." It Is Written (aka The Brave Knight Saves the Handsome Prince From a Fate Moste Untenable): "Fairy-tale AU, wherein Kris is a knight, and Adam is... a unicorn." How Becky Totally Saved the World Without Becoming a Mary Sue or: PLEASE R&R OR I'LL NEVER WRITE: "The upside of living with a prophet was the fanfic. And the forewarning of the apocalypse. But, mostly the fic." A Sam Adams Moment: "The clutch of seven ZPMs they find on Dedahr's rocky third moon results, in rough chronological order, in a brief fainting fit on Rodney's part; a message back to Atlantis that creates near hysteria amongst its scientists and startles a truly blasphemous exclamation in Czech out of Zelenka; a fully-powered city whose midnight glow is refracted through its shields; five destroyed hive ships and one very raucous, ruus-wine fuelled celebration; wormhole travel back to Earth, which is soon protected once more by the Ancient weapons platform in Antarctica; and the IOC declaring that the expedition's brief can be expanded from defence to broader exploration."

Tony has a point system for the times he can get Steve to be less than perfect.

Five times Beijing 2008 Olympics Gold Medalist Tony Stark thinks it's going to be no more difficult a job to get ready for London 2012, than what he has just achieved. That is, of course, before Coach Fury comes to visit, and offers him a once-in-a-lifetime chance to be a part of something much bigger than himself. Swimming AU.

Taking care of Tony is a lot of work. Especially when you’ve only got one arm. And your code dates back to the 1980s.

Tony Stark has once again engineered something that might well lead to the downfall of Western Civilization. No one's really surprised. This time, however, it might just be the lesser of two evils. Clint and Phil hate playing pickup, but damn, Clint loves the Roombas, and damn, Phil loves Clint, though he's not really sure why sometimes. It's time to play Hide-And-Seek with hostile robotic AIs in the SHIELD home office.

... Tony tells Bruce about Afghanistan.

"Let's say that Loki is Laufey's youngest, a useless runt except for how his small stature, shifting abilities and royal blood makes him perfect for a political marriage with Asgard."

It doesn't matter who you are; eventually, everyone's past catches up to them. This is Steve's side of the story Ready, Fire, Aim; you should probably read that before you read this.

There's no "I" in "Avenger."

Tony Stark has once again engineered something that might well lead to the downfall of Western Civilization. No one's really surprised. This time, however, it might just be the lesser of two evils.

What it says on the tin.

As good as you get: "The problem was, really, Kris Allen was a tease." If You Can't See Where It Keeps Its Brain: "The Sorting Hat has its own agenda." I Woke Up In Love This Morning: He was hazy, half-asleep and incredibly comfortable and still half-lost in the most amazing dream. Five Reasons Xander Harris Hates Pete Wentz: If the Bandom'verse and the Buffy'verse all occupied the same 'verse, this is exactly what would have happened. red, red, gold: "Her name is Tasha Stark, and you won’t break her."

Tony struggles to deal with his synaesthesia most of his adult life. Can he ever find somebody who understands what he’s dealing with?

AU crossover. Tony Stark has known Charles Xavier since Tony was eight and Xavier was his Uncle Charles. Now that Tony’s all grown up, Charles vets his dates. Well, most of them. Except for the ones where Charles brings someone who should really be in jail, not a fancy restaurant.

Phil Coulson has spent half his life working toward the Stanley Cup. The Malibu Avengers might finally be the team to take him there.